Smartphones Make Your Life Better...Or do they?

This Blog Posting will attempt to lay out for you some of the reasons why God called Steve Jobs off of his cloud and sent him somewhere else.

In many ways Smartphones have made our lives more difficult to live...

Ø Many of us feel a dramatic need to always be connected. 

Ø Many of us are compulsively checking our phones multiple times every hour.

Ø We are so obsessed with our phones 63% of us sleep with our phones in or next to our beds.

Ø This percent jumps to 73 percent among Millennials.

Ø Notifications are a constant source of interruption and tension.

Ø 28% of us feel annoyed when a notification goes off.

Ø 22% of us get anxious when a notification comes out of their phones.

Ø Still 65% of us say smartphones have made their quality of life better.  

Ø 42% of us would still prefer to communicate in-person but they don’t.

Ø 21% of us choose texting as the next best way to connect.

Ø 16% of us would prefer picking up the phone to communicate but they don’t.

Ø 51% (67% of Millennials) are convinced they could not live without their Smartphones.

Ø 27% percent feel worse about themselves after spending time on social media.

Ø Most young people see social media as a time-suck.

Ø 59% think that the Federal Government ought to make it all better by passing regulations. Can you say Pandora’s Box?

Wherever he is, I wonder if Steve Jobs is sorry for what he has done to us.

Fella Opinion: We should not blame Steve. He only created this modern marvel for us but he did not force us to take off running with it and, don't kid yourself, we are running down hill.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

 

Here Is A Story about A Record That Never Was But It Almost Was and If It Was It Would Be Unbreakable

Some of you don’t care about Football and because you don’t care about Football you may be tempted to not read this Blog Posting but if you are intrigued by What If’s read on because this is a Great What If.

This Blog Posting is about a Football Touchdown Passing Record that could have been, and if it had been, it would be Unbreakable because it would be Unbreakable.

First, let’s talk about the record that is not a What If Record but an Actual Existing Record.

Drew Brees holds the NFL record (54 games) for consecutive games with at least one touchdown pass. He set the record on October 7, 2012, when he surpassed the streak of 47 consecutive games by Johnny Unitas which had stood since December 11, 1960. Yes, Unitas had held the record for nearly 52 years after surpassing Cecil Isbell's streak of 23, which had been established as the record in 1942. Brees' record streak ended on Thursday November 29, 2012.

Tom Brady, at 52 games, is in 2^nd place. Brady was in 2^nd place to several Brees’ records (Brady was drafted 1 year before Brees). Now that Brees has retired and Brady is still playing that is changing.

Here are some interesting facts about the game where Drew Brees came up short which is something that did not happen to him very often...

Ø Brees almost had it to 55 games in a row late in the second quarter.

Ø He connected with Darren Sproles for a touchdown pass that would have pulled the Saints within three points at the half.

Ø Instead, tight end Jimmy Graham drew a penalty for offensive pass interference that negated that touchdown.

Ø Lance Moore was known as a Sure Handed Receiver.

Ø Moore had a very good game that day (7 receptions for 123 yards with the ball being thrown to him 11 times).

Ø Moore led all Saints in receiving that game.

Ø Moore’s 123 receiving yards was a season-high and just his third 100-yard game of the season. 

Ø  In the 4^th quarter Moore was wide open and uncovered when Brees threw him a short pass for what looked to be a sure touchdown but Moore Dropped the Ball!

************

That’s the end of the Record that is the Record. Now I am going to tell you about the Record that isn’t a Record...

Ø The next game that the Saints played Drew Brees started a New Completion Streak.

Ø This streak lasted from December 9, 2012 through November 29, 2015.

Ø I save you the trouble of trying to figure out how many games that was...This streak was 45 games!

The bottom line is, if Sure Handed Lance Moore had not dropped that short pass in the end zone while he was uncovered, Brees’ Consecutive Regular Season Games with a Touchdown Pass Record would be 55 Games plus 45 Games or an Even 100 Games!

Now do you understand why I said above that Drew Brees would be holding a record that would be acknowledged as an Unbreakable Record for the very good reason that it would be an Unbreakable Record!

Where is Tom Brady in all of this? He is still in second place at 52 Games.

If you are one that has no interest in Football, Football Records, Drew Brees, Tom Brady, the NFL or even Johnny Unitas, I am sorry you read this Blog Posting. Go back to the top of this Blog Posting and not read what you just read and that will make it all better and save you a lot of time...Or will it?

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

 

I’m Not Smart Enough!

 

I just read a news article that convinced me that I am not smart enough to understand what the heck Congress is doing. I don’t feel too badly about my admission of Not Smartness because I am also convinced that most members of Congress are not smart enough to know what most members of Congress are doing either.

Here is the News Article that caused my most recent consternation. If you do read it, I caution you that Confusion Will Result...

Seven Dems vote for GOP amendment, forcing Democratic scramble (msn.com)

If You Took the Time to Read This Foolishness, did you understand what you read?

If You Did Not Take the Time to Read This Foolishness, that may be Time Well Not Spent.

************

An alternative course of action would be to FaGetAboutAllOfTheAbove and read my very old Blog Posting about Congressional Smarts (first published in January 2010). I guarantee it is a lot more fun than the News Article above...

Too Many Members Of Congress Can’t Handle Numbers

Lots of numbers are being thrown around our 9% Approval Rating Congress these days. I watched in amazement recently on CSPAN as one of our elected "leaders" said the following …

"My good friend from the other side of the aisle has just voiced strong opposition to my proposal to spend $10 Billion to convert all states that are using Paper Ballots to Electronic Voting Machines and to convert all states who are using Electronic Voting Machines to Paper Ballots. I continue to be amazed at the short sightedness of the Opposition Party and their ongoing inability to handle basic arithmetic with regard to a mere $10 Billion price tag."

"I am sure that the folks back home have no problem with spending $10 Billion for such a worthy project. They understand that 10 is not a big number. 11 is bigger than 10 and so is 12. If I were asking for 18, that ought to give pause to the taxpayers as to how their money is being spent but 10 is only 10.  It is hardly more than 9."

"Beam me up Lord. I can no longer stand being around these penny-pinchers who are not smarter than a 5th grader."

Ok, I admit I made up all of the above … or did I?

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

 

This Just Does Not Make Sense!

I once lived high up on a mountain in a log cabin 8 miles from Dahlonega, GA and 8 miles from Cleveland, GA. That’s where I learned that Scorpions were not so bad because we had Scorpions inside the cabin but we did not have Roaches. I speculated that the Scorpions must have been eating the Roaches and I really don’t like Roaches so I thanked God for the Scorpions each night as I got down on my knees to pray (after I made sure I was not about to kneel near a Scorpion).

When one lives out in nature one’s mind can wander and here is where my mind wandered...

Ø This was about the time when the news shows started really warning us about China.

Ø We were told that China was our enemy because it wanted to do real mean things to us like: kill us all, blow us all up, invade us and take away our smartphones.

Ø My wandering mind wandered all around these issues and it stumbled into this line of thinking...
>Cleveland, Georgia and Dahlonega, Georgia were very close to each other (still are).
>One day the mayor of Cleveland called his City Council together for a meeting at which he laid out this proposed plan of action...
>>Cleveland gets 75% of its retail business activity from the people who live in Dahlonega.
>>He said he was not sure why Dahlonegans were so infatuated with coming to Cleveland to shop but Cleveland’s Chamber of Commerce has shown him the statistics which documented that this had been the case for the last 20 years.
>>He then proposed to the Council that Cleveland set up its Guided Missile Battalion tonight and first thing in the morning send enough Ballistic Missiles to Dahlonega to wipe Dahlonega off the face of the Earth.

Having heard the Mayor’s Plan of Action the Council held a short discussion and voted 100% to approve what he had proposed.

Do you get my drift? Why would Clevelandites want to kill all the people who are contributing so much to Cleveland’s Economy?

It is not a quantum leap to then ask why does China want to be so mean to the Good Ole USofA a country which is contributing so much to the Economy of the People’s Republic of China.

Time for the Yea’s...

Ø Yea I know this is Silly.

Ø Yea I know it is Foolishness.

Ø Yea I know I don’t know what I am talking about...again.

As Silly and Foolish as this Blog Posting is, can any one of you explain to me why it is not Mind Wandering Worthy?

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: Isn’t it strange how Communists Countries insist on naming themselves as if they were not Communists Countries...

Ø China ... People ’s Republic of China

Ø Soviet Union ... Union of Soviet Socialist Republics

Ø East Germany ... The German Democratic Republic

Who Do You Believe?

There once was a TV Show called, Who Do You Trust?  This Blog Posting will tell you how to find someone you can trust.

Many might advise you to go to Experts in whatever field you are seeking to be informed about. How do you find a Field Expert? The simplest way is to ask to see their Business Card. If the card says “Expert”, you know you can believe anything and everything that guy will tell you. (Is there a difference between “anything” and “everything”?)

Having said that, I now say this...Don’t believe me.

I once read a Book entitled, ''Nothing Like It in the World'' by Stephen Ambrose. It is about the building of the Transcontinental Railroad. What an Awesome Undertaking!

The book told me there were Experts back in the 1850s (with or without business cards there have always been Experts). Having read the book I now know (and you are about to know) what some Experts were saying back then that was not right about the high speed travel of Railroad Cars vs. the Horse and Buggy. The Experts of the late 1850's were on record as saying...

The Human Body Would Be Harmed If It Were Subjected To Traveling Faster Than 60 Miles Per Hour

Around where I live my fellow travelers go almost this fast as they zip through Stop Signs.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: All Capp (I’ve blogged about him before but if you forget who he was, Google him) said of himself that He Was an Expert on Nothing with an Opinion on Everything.

Very Likely the Only One in the Entire Good Ole USofA!

 

Alan Alda was the most prominent member of the MASH TV Show, so I’ll blame him for this deception...

For 11 Seasons Alan Alda Lied To Us

Alda portrayed Koreans as uneducated shuffling creatures that looked like they came from the distant past who had been left back there in the past by the rest of civilization as everybody else progressed into the present day. We were Really Cool and Koreans were Awfully Not Cool.

I know something about Koreans as they really are (not as Alan Alda said they were) because I am surrounded by Koreans here in the part of the State of Georgia where I live. I don’t know why so many Koreans chose where I live to immigrate to but I know for a fact that every time I turn around There They Are. I even stopped turning around for a week and They Were Still There.

Don’t get me wrong. I am not saying that is a bad thing that there are Koreans all around me. I am simply stating the fact that they are all around me.

We often go to a nearby park to walk a very pleasant trail that goes in a loop for about a mile and a half. On any of our walks we might see Rabbits, Copperhead Snakes and/or Deer. On every one of our walks we are certain to see Koreans walking the opposite direction. If we see 30 humans beings coming at us, 27 of those approaching humans will be Koreans.

************

This bit of Foolishness has gone on for 265 words before the strip of asterisks above and I have yet to say How Alan Alda Lied To Us For 11 Years.

OK here it is...

Alan Alda Always Portrayed Koreans as Poor and Therein is the Lie...They Are Definitely Not Poor!

I wonder what a bunch of American Automobile Tycoons somewhere back in time would have had to say about the proposed shift from European Immigration to Asian Immigration. Would have said through their cigar smoke, “Hell yea! Bring them there Asians in. When they get here they are going to need transportation and they will buy a whole bunch of American Made Automobiles!”

If they had said that, they would have been as wrong as wrong can be. I am The Noticer and I have been Noticing for decades that Asians do not buy American Made Cars. That’s a fact, Jack!

What they do buy are Toyotas, Nissans, Hyundai’s, Kias, Subaru’s, Hondas, Isuzu’s, Mazda’s, Mitsubishis, etc. More specifically they drive the High End Asian Cars...Infiniti, Acura, Lexus.

A small number of them drive German Cars (again the expensive German cars)...BMW, Mercedes-Benz, Porsche or Audi.

There is the Alan Alda Lie...Koreans Are Not Poor! Koreans Are Rich!

************

It finally happened. Within the last month I saw my first Asian driving an American Made Car. Actually I saw my first 2 Asians Driving American Cars. They were both driving Cadillac’s.

Hold on, Fella, did you not take note that both of the 2 Asian Driven American Made Cars were Expensive American Made Cars and were Both Black Cadillac’s. That probably means I saw the same car twice!

Do you remember the Title of this Blog Posting?...

Very Likely the Only One in the Entire Good Ole USofA!

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: During my Mediocre Automotive Career I worked for a time for American Motors Corporation. AMC’s main assembly plant was in Kenosha, Wisconsin. I had a brilliant plan about how we could vastly increase our sales output but no one paid me no never mind. If we had changed the name of our company to Kenosha Motors Corporation, the American Buying Public would have thought we were a Japanese Company and sales would have shot up like a rocket.

 

The first great part of my great day was the fact that I played tennis and I hit 2 or 3 good shots.

Before I tell you about the best part of my great day, allow me to set the scene...

Ø At home I feed the Birds, Chipmunks and Squirrels.

Ø Actually I do not intend to feed the Chipmunks and Squirrels.

Ø They climb up pole that holds the Birdfeeder and Feed Themselves!

When I see them eating the bird’s birdseed I often charge out the back door and shout at them as if I am doing something useful and teaching them a lesson but I am doing no such thing. I know they are laughing as they scramble away thinking I am not as smart as they are smart. Today I proved I was smarter than the average Georgia Backyard Chipmunk or Squirrel and, in a moment, you will agree that I am that smart.

I proved my smarts by oiling the Climbing Up Pole with Canola Cooking Oil. Yes my day was made perfect when I watched the Chipmunks and Squirrels try and climb up the Climbing Up Pole only to slide back down to the Bottom of the Climbing Up Pole!

I knew it! I knew I was smarter than a Chipmunk or Squirrel and deep down you knew it too!...Or did u?

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

 

Don’t Look Back Because Your Back Might Be Back There and That May Be Major Problems for You

 

Here are the things my chiropractor warned me about. Can’t believe I recorded all of this? I've got nothing else to do...

In about 2003 I was on the ground in my back yard chipping dead branches off of a low tree I had recently transplanted and then I stood up. That was all it took to throw my back out, as they say.

For the next 5 days I did as directed by whoever was the last person I discussed my back situation with:

Ø Put cold on it.

Ø Then I changed to putting heat on it.

Ø Then I changed to putting cold on it.

Ø Then I lay on the floor a lot.

Ø Then I changed to putting heat on it.

Ø Then I lay on the floor and arched my back a lot.

Ø Then I changed to putting cold on it again.

Ø Then I sat on frozen peas.

Ø Then I repeated all of the above.

After 5 days it felt better. I went to play in the Golden Senior Olympics Doubles Tournament. We rolled along singing a song for 12 games. We were headed for a gold medal. I glided up to the service line and reached for a simple back hand shot and my back exploded in two violent shocks and I was on my hands and knees moaning (my partner said my whole body was quivering). I was done for the day and for weeks thereafter. Guess it was not much of a tournament because after only playing 12 games we had won enough games to get a Bronze Medal.

My daughter talked me into going to a Chiropractor. I have always thought of Chiropractors as kooks. I still may but this Chiropractor has helped me. I have a reoccurring problem but it is under control and I am back on the tennis court.

I'm doing quite well. I sit on peas a lot.

************

My Chiropractor gave me a lot of advice. I am going to now pass this advice onto each of you. This is another demonstration of how nice a guy I am.

Chiropractic-Don't Do's To Protect You from Your Back

Ø Tension is bad. If something terrible happens and you get really sad, your back could attack you

Ø Tension is bad. Good tension is also bad. If something great happens and you get really happy, your back could attack you.

Ø The Vacuum Cleaner is bad. It should be moved by walking forward and backward but not by bending your back to and fro. If you move to and fro using your back to do the toing and froing, your back could attack you.

Ø If you are in a squat down position and you reach forward and you then stand up, your back could attack you.

Ø If when you get up from a squat down position you don't look up as far as your neck will allow you to look up, your back could attack you.

Ø If when you sit in a chair, you do not do it with your back straight, on the edge of the chair and then slide into the chair, your back could attack you.

Ø If when you get up out of a chair you don't slide forward to the edge and stand up with your eyes looking at the far wall/horizon with your back straight, your back could attack you.

Ø If you use artificial sweeteners of any kind, your back could attack you.

Ø If you intake caffeine, your back could attack you.

Ø If you intake certain kinds of tea, your back could attack you.

Ø If you don't hydrate your body by drinking lots of fluids the day of exercise but especially the day before exercise, your back could attack you.

Ø If you don't hydrate your body everyday by drinking lots of fluids, your back could attack you.

Ø If you sleep on your side without placing your knees one on top of the other, your back could attack you.

Ø If you twist around in your car to get something out of the back seat, your back could attack you.

Ø If you lay on the floor to watch an NBA Basketball Game with your legs fully extended, your back could attack you.

Ø If you reach too far when cleaning your windshield with a squeegee, your back could attack you.

Ø If you drink straight Gatorade, your back could attack you.

Ø If you don't put cold on your injured back (she recommends using a 5 pound bag of Wal-Mart Frozen Peas to put the cold where the cold should be put), your back could attack you.

Ø If you put heat on your injured back too often, your back could attack you.

Ø If you don't put one foot on something so it is higher than the other when you bend over the sink to rinse your face, your back could attack you.

Ø If you are standing up straight, you should have one foot in front of the other. If you don't have one foot in front of the other, your back could attack you.

So you see, if you have a bad back, everything you have been doing your whole life has been bad for your back. If you had just stayed in your baby crib and lay on your side with your knees one-on-top of the other until you went away to college, your back would not have attacked you.

Taking care of your peas.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: This comment came from a Vietnam buddy...

BTW, how the hell could those little lumps (frozen peas) help your back ???? Tee hee. I'm not sure if this was a serious question but I'll answer it anyway. She believes in putting COLD on the problem. The peas mold to the back and 5 pounds covers a wide enough area. Of course, you have to keep working at the peas to keep them from becoming one big frozen lump cuz you keep taking them in and out of the freezer. This means that when you take them out of the freezer you sometimes pound on 'em with your fist OR put 'em on the floor and walk and stomp all over them. You have to be careful doing this cuz, since it is 5 pounds high, you could fall off of the peas and hurt your back. 

 

Do What I Tell You To Do Now. The Consequences Of Doing What I Tell You To Do Now Will Be Addressed Later. Trust Me.

 

I did not write this...

Warning About ‘Environmental Danger’ of Solar Transition: LA Times

The LA Times published a report Thursday detailing the “environmental danger” of expired solar panels on the environment.

“California has been a pioneer in pushing for rooftop solar power, building up the largest solar market in the U.S.,” the article began. “More than 20 years and 1.3 million rooftops later, the bill is coming due.”

The Times’ Rachel Kisela reported that many solar panels that were purchased beginning in 2006, when the California government “showered subsidies on homeowners” to inspire a transition away from fossil fuels, are now reaching the end of their lifespan.

“Beginning in 2006, the state, focused on how to incentivize people to take up solar power, showered subsidies on homeowners who installed photovoltaic panels but had no comprehensive plan to dispose of them. Now, panels purchased under those programs are nearing the end of their 25-year lifecycle,” Kisela reported.

The problem is, when solar panels end up in landfills, “components that contain toxic heavy metals such as selenium and cadmium can contaminate groundwater.”

This is an example of how environmental policies can have unintended consequences. “The looming challenge over how to handle truckloads of contaminated waste illustrates how cutting-edge environmental policy can create unforeseen hazards down the road,” she said.

The Times reported that “as California barreled ahead on its renewable-energy program, focusing on rebates and — more recently — a proposed solar tax, questions about how to handle the toxic waste that would accrue years later were never fully addressed.”

“Now, both regulators and panel manufacturers are realizing that they don’t have the capacity to handle what comes next,” she continued.

Toxic waste from solar panels is not just a Californian problem, but a problem nationwide. “About 140,000 panels are installed every day in the United States, and the solar industry is expected to quadruple in size between 2020 and 2030,” Kisela said.

But there are difficulties surrounding disposal of solar panels, “Recycling solar panels isn’t a simple process. Highly specialized equipment and workers are needed to separate the aluminum frame and junction box from the panel without shattering it into glass shards.”

“Specialized furnaces are used to heat panels to recover silicon. In most states, panels are classified as hazardous materials, which require expensive restrictions on packaging, transport and storage,” she continued.

“A lack of consumer awareness about the toxicity of materials in the panels and how to dispose of them is part of the problem,” Kisela wrote.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

The Dutch Are On The Verge Of Approving Work At Home As A Legal Right

The Dutch House has passed a bill to make Work at Home a Legal Right in the Netherlands. The Dutch Senate has yet to concur in what the Dutch House has passed but it appears to only be a matter of time before the Senate follows suit.

There are many other articles being published that are speculating that, if the Dutch do make Work at Home a Legal Right, the rest of Europe, Canada and others will follow.

Yesterday I put on my Potted Plant Outfit and slithered around a major local corporation and overheard this phone conversation. (Yea, I do have the ability to hear the person on the other end of the line even when that person is not on speaker phone.)

Sad Work at Home Employee: “No one cares about me”.

Concerned Human Resources Manager: “I have been told you were feeling this way. That’s why I called you to see if there is anything I can do to alleviate your distress”.

Sad Work at Home Employee: “I have no day to day in person contact with my best friend any longer. I tweeted him and tweeted back saying he felt the same way. We miss each other’s camaraderie greatly!”

Concerned Human Resources Manager: “Please tell me more. I need to feel your pain.”

Sad Work at Home Employee: “You know I just don’t feel connected to my company any longer.”

Concerned Human Resources Manager: “I think I’m beginning to better understand where you are coming from. I have proposal that...” (Concerned Human Resources Manager was interrupted in mid sentence by Sad Work at Home Employee.)

Sad Work at Home Employee: “I simply feel no one at my company cares about my professional development.”

Concerned Human Resources Manager: “The picture is coming through crystal clear and I now see how serious your situation is and I believe we must take the bull by the horns and nip this one in the bud before it is too late. I always say, ‘A stitch In Time Is Worth Two In The Bush!’”

Sad Work at Home Employee: “I’m glad I have gotten your attention. Before you propose what my company will do to fix my issues please allow me to sum it all up by saying, the Bottom Line is I no longer have any Team Identification with our company.”

Concerned Human Resources Manager: “I now feel your pain! The now see the only way to fix all of your complex issues. I recommend you start coming to the office 2 days a week.”

Sad Work at Home Employee: "No!"

************

While I was overhearing what was reported to you above, I saw the Concerned Assistant Human Resources Manager brought to tears as he pleaded with another Work at Home Employee to come back into the office.

As I was slithering out the door I asked him about his frustration. Specifically I asked him what position this other Work at Home Employee held. I felt his pain when he replied, “Front Office Receptionist”.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: If you care to read about what’s happening in Holland, click here...https://www.deseret.com/u-s-world/2022/7/14/23190318/netherlands-enshrines-work-from-home-as-a-right-elon-musk-tesla-office-covid-pandemic

 

 

But It’s Only A Butt

It won’t hurt anything. It’s very small. Drop it on the ground. Everybody else does. No one will pay it no nevermind.

Imagine how bad it would be if millions and millions of people had not given up smoking in the last 58 years...

Fella Disclaimer: Heck if I know if the above shocking picture is true but I did find it on the Internet. That fact might give you the confidence to believe it...Or might it not?

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe:  The bullets below are from a report issued in 2014 on the 50^th Anniversary of the 1964 Surgeon General’s Landmark Report on the Dangers of Smoking...

Ø Although smoking has decreased over the 50 years—from 52% to 25% of adult men, and from 35% to 19% of adult women—the decline has slowed over the last two decades.

Ø It is estimated that half a million Americans die from smoking every year, and this number has not changed in a decade.

Ø Smoking costs the U.S. economy about $100 billion per year, including direct medical costs and the indirect cost of lost productivity from employee sick time due to smoking-related illness.

Ø The Surgeon General cautions that current efforts to reduce smoking are not getting as much support as they need. 

Ø While many states have received substantial funds from settlements with tobacco companies which were intended for tobacco control programs, this funding is frequently been spent elsewhere. 

Ø In 2013, Alaska was the only state to fund their tobacco control programs at the level recommended by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC).

Why isn’t the Underlined Part above a crime?

The Supreme Court Got It All Wrong...Again!

There they were again. Marching up and down again. Holding all sorts of signs again. Shouting out rhyming chants over and over again.

I had the feeling that I had seen and heard all this before and I had because I had seen and heard all of this yesterday and the day before yesterday and last week and the week before last and last month and the month before last. If the late Yul Brynner were not late he would probably say... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1JHH6iwgIek

Somehow this one was different. Not only am I the Noticer but I am the Curious Noticer so I started trying to get to the bottom of this protest...

Me: Tell me exactly why you are demonstrating today.

He: I am demonstrating because the Radical Out Of Control Supreme Court just announced their latest decision.

Me: I’m confused.

He: Tell me why you are confused. There is nothing demonstrators love to do more than to disburse confusion wherever we find it. Confusion is a terrible thing. It’s so confusing.

Me: I have been listening to your rhyming every day chants every day for months now and I am certain that what the Supreme Court announced today was in complete agreement with what you were rhyming chanting yesterday that you wanted them to decide today. You got what you were demanding. In other words, You Won!

He: It makes no difference what we were chanting we wanted. If this Radical Out Of Control Supreme Court has announced a decision that is in agreement with what we were demanding than what we were demanding must not have been what we wanted and we must take a stand and change our demands to be in opposition to what this Radical Out Of Control Supreme Court has decided.

Me: It is going to take a lot of retooling to change your long held position and stop on a dime and turn around and be against what you were in favor of only yesterday.

He: Believe me it is not a problem. Our organization is nothing if we are not flexible. Our Sign Painting Department does this all the time. Our Rhyming Chant Guys are top notch professionals. They will be cranking out new Rhyming Chants before you know what hit you.

I told him I understood perfectly but I did not. There are not many times when Fella is speechless but this was certainly one of those times.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

 

Don’t Feel Bad If You Don’t Know Who Eratosthenes Was

If Eratosthenes was not so Late (he died in 194 BC), he probably would not know who you are either.

Eratosthenes was a very smart guy. He had nothing else to do one day so he started to think (he did that a lot). He thought to himself, I wonder what the circumference of the Earth is.

He became obsessed about knowing the answer to this question. The problem was he did not have any technical gear like calculators, smartphones & such. All he had was a stick. He said to himself, “That will do”.

He stuck the stick into the ground and measured the moving shadow of the stick on the ground for awhile. He came up a Circumference Estimate for the Earth that later proved to be over 98.5% accurate. The year was 200BC.

You probably have plans for today but I bet there isn’t a shadow of a doubt that you plans won’t shake a stick to what Eratosthenes did that day.

************

Sixteen hundred and ninety two years later Columbus decided to ignore what Eratosthenes and his stick had come up with so long ago. By doing this Columbus proved to all the world for all time that he was not as smart as Eratosthenes was smart.

The sad thing is he had actually studied what Eratosthenes had written about the size of the Earth. Nevertheless, using a map by that had been worked up by a guy named Toscanelli, he chose to believe that the Earth's circumference was 25% smaller than the size Eratosthenes and his stick had come up with.

If Columbus had accepted Eratosthenes's larger value, he would have known that the place where he made landfall was not Asia, but rather a New World.

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In today’s world, if Eratosthenes had been in the opposition party to the party of the Talking Head who was Talking His Head about Eratosthenes, it would have been reported that Eratosthenes had lied.

It would not be that Eratosthenes was close or made a pretty good guess. Because he was not exactly right on with his calculations it would have been reported on the Nightly News he had lied because he had said the circumference of the Earth was 39,425 km, which is 1.5% less than the real circumference, 40,008 km.

If Eratosthenes were not so dead, he would probably say, “I sure am glad I am as dead as I am”.

On the other hand, if Eratosthenes were in the other opposition party the Talking Heads in that party would come to his defense by saying, “Everybody lies about the circumference of the Earth”.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mw30CgaXiQw