Protecting Our Children Can Be Dangerous To Our Children

The first time I saw a baby being strapped into a car seat backwards and all alone in the rear seat, I said to myself, “Self, this can’t be good.”

We now have had a decade or so of this experiment in Childhood Confusion and the chickens are coming home to roost.

I just read an article which is reporting a serious Children Behavioral Abnormality (otherwise known as CBA). It seems children are doing things backwards and we, as a society, don’t seem to know what to do about it.

Here are a few CBAs that demonstrate how serious this situation is...

The Alphabet...

• First Graders are now unable to recite the twenty-six letters of the alphabet starting with A B C.
• They start with Z Y X and end up at the letter A.
• The good news is they can recite their Backwards Alphabet very well and the ole A B C Jingle that we know and love is alive and well, but backwards.

 The Great American Pastime...

• Baseball Little League coaches are having a very difficult time getting their pitchers to throw the baseball from the pitcher’s mound to home plate.
• They want to throw to second base.
• Tom Hanks said in that girlie baseball movie, “There’s no crying in baseball.”
• Actually crying is rampant in Little League Baseball nowadays but it is the coaches that are doing the crying.

Basketball...

• There is a Pee Wee Basketball player in Indiana, of all places, who keeps shooting on wrong end of court.
• He does alright in practice and for much of the actual games he plays in but, when the game is on the line and his adrenalin gets to flowing, he starts putting the ball into his opponent’s goals.
• The Coach is, however, hesitant to try and turn him around. Sports Illustrated quotes the coach as saying, “The kid is really good. He makes a very high percent of his shot attempts.”

There was some speculation that our 9% Approval Rated Congress would get involved but most of them are having trouble understanding what the problem is. Senator Foghorn Leghorn said yesterday, “Son, I say son, what’s wrong with doing things backwards?”

Would I kid u?