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I read an article about an actress I never heard of on a hit TV show I’ve never heard of who got hit on the head by a piece of Set Equipment. The Set Equipment was sent flying into her celebrity head by a large gust of wind.
She was taken to the hospital but is now recovered to the point that she is issuing statements to the press and to her breathless, worried and adoring fans. Here is what she had to say... Thanks to everyone for their prayers and good wishes.
The Smartfella is highly trained in deciphering and analyzing celebrity statements. Here is the part of the statement that was not stated... I am feeling much better. I am doing so well that I will shortly be filing a series of lawsuits that ought to make me richer than a whole mess of other adored celebrities who have a lot more talent than I have.
The Smartfella is also a sneaky person. I disguised myself as a potted plant (one of my favorite disguises) and stationed my potted self in the corner of the celebrity’s flower filled hospital suite. Here is what I heard her discussing with her team of lawyers...
- How much should they sue the Television Network for?
- How much should they sue the Director of the hit TV series for?
- How much should they sue the Sponsors of the hit TV series for?
- How much should they sue the manufacturer of the Set Equipment for for not putting Velcro Attachments on all of their Set Equipment pieces so these dangerous thingies would not go flying with the wind?
- How much should they sue God for for allowing the wind to become gusty?
It saddens me to have had to burst your bubbles, my dear readers, about celebrities. I know you all admire them so.
I just feel I have an obligation to tell all of you, as they say in southwest Louisiana, How The Cow Eat The Cabbage. I can hear your minds mulling over what How The Cow Eat The Cabbage means. I can’t help you out because I never have fully figured this one out myself.
I am ready to reveal to the world what I recorded in my leafy looking recorder in the corner of that hospital suite.
On the other hand, if she will cut me in for a piece of the action, I will be glad to ForgetAboutIt.
Would I kid u?