Monday, January 18, 2016

When Push Comes To Shove In The House Of Representatives

The new Speaker of the House has his House upset at him. He is trying to get the members to pay attention to what is going on in the House. It has become apparent that these Dedicated Long Serving Public Servants are pushing back.

Many have started calling him (behind his back) “Pushy” after he delivered a memo to the House entitled, “Enough with the lollygagging”.

One of the most often spoken words in the House for some time now has been “Sanctions”. Putting Sanctions on Iran is something that will certainly get their attention...Or will it?

The Speaker last week started nudging the chamber to get a bit more efficient when voting. His message must not have sunk in, because so many lawmakers missed the vote on the high-profile Iran Sanctions Legislation that the voting ended up being scrapped because of lack of interest & had to be rescheduled for later this month.

I got into my car & drove to Washington, D.C. a few days ago to see this situation played out for myself. Yes I get in my car & drive up to Washington a lot. Actually my car has started to rebel against these frequent trips. As I neared Washington on this trip a message popped up on my GPS Screen that said, “Why don’t you just move to D.C.? It would be a lot easier on me!”

I talked to many members of the House who were really upset with Pushy Ryan...

Ø Representative Leghorn was very open with his opposition to what the Speaker is trying to do. He told me that when Ryan first arrived in Congress he had gone out of his way to take him under his wing. On several occasions he took Ryan with him on Coffee Breaks & showed him how to turn a 20 minute Coffee Break into a 75 minute discussion about Football.

Ø Representative Whiplash told me how he tried to educate Ryan about how long one could sit absolutely still at his desk before cobwebs started to form between his arms & his upper body.

Ø Representative Swindle told me how he had once hoped that Ryan might have what it took to break his long-standing record of missing more votes than anyone else in the House but Ryan disappointed him by not showing any interest in going after this milestone.

Representative Igotmine (has been in up there so long that he can’t remember which State originally sent him to Congress) was not bothered in the least by what the new Speaker was trying to do. He said he intended to be present on the floor of the House whenever Pushy directed he should be there because he has developed the ability to sit at his desk with his eyes wide open while being sound asleep. He seemed particularly proud as he explained to me how he had even developed the sleep mannerism where he periodically scratched his nose while still being in Deep REM Sleep.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella