There once was a time when Losing Weight was all about Deprivation, Sacrifice and Sweat. You had to Bite the Bullet.
Now the diet plans that we see on TV are all shouting at us about...
Ø How easy it is to lose weight.
Ø We hardly have to pay any attention to our efforts to lose weight and we will lose weight.
Ø It’s almost free because they give us vast quantities of their losing weight food at no cost.
Ø We don’t have to count calories.
Ø We don’t have to measure anything.
Ø We don’t have to go to meetings.
Ø We are required to eat lots of food (provided we eat the Diet Plan’s Food).
Ø We can eat up to 6 times a day (provided we eat the Diet Plan’s Food).
Ø If it were not for the fact that we have to sleep some, we could eat more than 6 times a day (provided we eat the Diet Plan’s Food) and lose even more weight.
Yesterday I was at the track jogging and that beautiful lady (who used to be fat and used to be a kid and used to sing with her brothers) was on the other side of the fence that surrounds the track shouting at me. She was shouting, “Stop that! Are you seriously thinking that exercise will make you lose weight? Go home and eat my Diet Plan’s Food!”
I think she would have jumped the fence (she could not do that when she was fat) and come at me, if it were not for the fact that she was afraid that just being on the track surface would cause her to gain weight.
Would I kid u?
Smartfella
Lagniappe: The latest fad diet out there is the Floss and Spit Diet. It is really simple. All you do is spit out the food you get from between your teeth from flossing rather than swallowing it.
I apologize for this bit of silliness. I admit I made this one up...Or did I?
