Monday, September 27, 2021

The Immune System Is In Vogue

 

I am The Noticer and you are not but have you noticed that the easiest way to sell darn near anything in the Good Ole USofA today is to claim that whatever you are selling is Good for Our Immune Systems?

Ø Vitamins that we have known and taken for years which used to claim to be good for something or other inside our bodies now claim to be especially beneficial to our Immune Systems.

Ø Foods we once ate because they tasted good now purport to Benefit Our Immune Systems.

Ø I heard a Talking Head at the end of his news report tell me that Sunshine contributes to a Robust Immune System. He finished up with, “Oh yea, it is also gives you Vitamin D and Skin Cancer”.

If our Congress were not so busy doing Silly Crazy Stuff, I would write them a letter and draw this to their Divided Attention but, I am also an expert on Wasting Time, and I know that would be a Big Waste of Time.

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Here Comes the Serious Foolishness Part of this Blog Posting

I do think that these claims are getting out of hand...

Ø Automobile Manufacturers are pitching to us, “If we ever get enough Semiconductor Chips to start making cars again, be sure to come into one of our cobwebbed covered dealerships and buy a car or two. An independent test by independent testers has shown that each mile you drive in one of our cars boosts your immune System 3 times more than any of our competitor’s cars will boost your Immune System”.

Ø This one bugs me...“Our bug killer does not work that well when it comes to killing bugs but inhaling the bug spray while you are spraying it in the direction of those bugs smiling back at you will Boost Your Immune System”. (Bet you did not know that bugs can smile.)

Ø Pandemic Obsessed Fearful of Everything People had stopped going down to the Bottom of the Grand Canyon. The National Park Service reversed this trend by claiming that the air you breathe at the bottom of the Grand Canyon is “Perfected” by Mother Nature. This perfection comes about because of a combination of River Water Evaporation, Pine Tree Excretions, Bear Poo Odor and Hiker Sweat. This natural process turns the air down there into an excellent way to boost even the most Anemic of Anemic Immune Systems.

LexisNexis reports that “Immune System” has forged ahead of “Transparency” in usage by those of us who once lived happily in the Good Ole USofA but who are now too uneasy about everything going on around us to be as happy as they once were.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: If you search the Internet with a phrase like “products that deliver immunity”, you can then spend the rest of the day Reading All About Them.

Here is how some of the manufacturers described their products...

Ø Vitamin C Daily Immune Support, Pink Lemonade

Ø Absolute Nutrition, Immunity, Zinc with Vitamin C & Vitamin B

Ø Advanced Immune Defense, 6-in-1 Powerful Blend of Vitamin C

Ø D3, Zinc, Elderberries, Garlic Bulb, Echinacea - Supports Overall Health, Provides Vital Nutrients & Antioxidants

Ø More Vitamin C than 10 Oranges with Other Key Antioxidants

Ø Enhanced Immune Support Formula

Ø Delivers Vitamin D, Antioxidants and a Proprietary Complex with Wellmune, Betaglucans and Arabinogalactans

Ø Daily Immune Support and Botanicals

Ø Immunity Power + Vitamin C

Ø Immunity with Elderberry, Zinc, & Vitamin C – Supports Respiratory Health & Immune Defense

Ø Immunity System Booster Supplement USDA Organic Immune Support with Vitamin C, Oregano, Moringa, Plus Potent 4:1 Extracts: Elderberry, Astragalus & Ginger

They must be selling well because a whole bunch of the products are listed as, “Out Of Stock”.

If you were to take about 10 of these products and drank them in a kind of Immunity Cocktail, after you died your attending physician would have to remove your heart, put it on the floor and beat it to death with a stick.