Sunday, July 05, 2020

It’s Worse Than Even I Ever Thought It Could Be

Here is a snippet from a Blog Posting that Fella released on June 1, 2011. In it Fella explains how Dr. Jonas Salk would never have invented his Salk Polio Vaccine if he had been Constantly Interrupted by his Constantly Interrupting Smartphone...

“Now we are demanding that they tell us news over and over and quicker and quicker. We don’t want to wait for anything. We install apps on our phones to notify us immediately when something is happening that we mistakenly think we can’t do without.

I saw where there is an app that will notify you when a High Speed Pursuit is live on TV.

Can you imagine if Doctor Jonas Salk had been one of these High Speed Pursuit Junkies? Every time he started to make headway on his Polio Vaccine his phone would play the silly little tune he had carefully selected. He would have stopped his research and ran to his TV to watch the latest chase in progress. When he got hack to his work bench, he would have been heard to say, ‘Now where was I?’

If this obsession had been his obsession, we would still have Iron Lungs all over the place. (For those of you who don’t know what an Iron Lung is, Google It!)”

Without his wonderful Vaccine young people would be trapped inside all those Iron Lung Machines instead of running around the Good Ole USofA Burning and Protesting everything in the Good Ole USofA. That would be terrible...Or would it?

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Why have I pulled up the above information from 2011? It’s because I turned on my Smartphone this morning and was greeted by an invitation from a News Outlet to be constantly notified about darn near anything and everything you can imagine about anything and everything.

If the Inventors like Dr. Salk sign up for all of these Interruptions, it won’t be long before we will be Googling, “Inventors” and “Inventions”.

Here are the Notification Opportunities my Smartphone offered me this morning. They call them “Notifications” but I’m of a mind to think they ought to be called “Interruption Opportunities”....

Notification Settings

Make sure you never miss any important news. Use the options below to customize the Push Notifications you receive.

Ø Breaking News Alerts
Get up-to-the-moment alerts on Breaking News and Major Stories.

Ø Programming Alerts
Never miss Exclusive Programming, Historic Events, and Live Programming.

Ø Watch Live
We’ll alert you when a new Live Stream becomes available for viewing.

Ø Coronavirus Alerts
Keep up with the latest COVID-19 News.

Ø US
We’ll alert you whenever major News Breaks in the United States.

Ø World
We’ll alert you whenever major News Breaks around the World.

Ø Opinion
We’ll alert you to compelling Opinion and Analysis from our Top Columnists.

Ø Politics
We’ll alert you when major Political News breaks in Washington and around the Nation.

Ø Democracy 2020
We’ll alert you to all the latest developments in the 2020 Presidential Race.

Ø Entertainment
We’ll alert you to all the latest news and feature stories from the Entertainment World.

Ø Lifestyle
We’ll alert you to our best coverage of Lifestyle and Leisure.

Ø Media
We’ll alert you to stories about the Media and how it covers your world.

Ø SciTech
We’ll alert you to compelling stories about Science and Technology.

Ø Health
We’ll alert you to our best coverage of issues that could affect your Health.

Ø Sports
We’ll alert you to all the latest news and feature stories from Sports.

Ø Autos
We’ll alert you to our best coverage of news from the Automobile Industry.

Let us not forget that these Interruption Opportunities, if accepted, would be added onto the many other Interruptions you have already fallen prey to like... Text Messages, Emails, Facebookers Facebooking you about what they think you cannot live without, Reminders, Alarms, Instagrams, Tweets, Snap Chats, etc.

Oops! I almost forgot Phone Calls. I don’t know if it is true but I also read recently that some people who own Smartphone (that’s everybody) are actually still using their Smartphones to make Phone Calls.

Father to Starving Children, “I’m sorry, starving children, I can’t Bring Home the Bacon or Put Food on the Table because I’m too busy being Constantly Interrupted by my Chosen Interruptions.”

Would I kid u?

Smartfella  

Lagniappe:

Ø Interruption Industry
This is exciting news! 
Now you can rest assured that you will not accomplish anything of importance your entire day! You no longer have to wait to be Interrupted! The Interruption Industry has come up with the technology necessary to Interrupt Interruptions while the Interruptions are still in the process of Interrupting.