Last week I put on my Potted Plant Outfit and went slithering around our Transportation Department in Washington D.C. to see what’s going on in the world of Transportation. It just so happened that I picked an action packed day to go slithering about.
It was absolute chaos! The office was full of advocates from People for the Advancement of the Right to Take Any Animal Anywhere who were busy advocating their cause.
You may not be aware that our Airlines are under assault by this and 32 other organizations of a similar persuasion.
Here is one of the conversations I overheard...
Ø Animal Advocate (AA) said, “Peacocks are not that big! An Ostrich is big but a Peacock is only large and large is not big”.
Ø Beleaguered Transportation Official (BTO) said, “Looks pretty big to me”. (What the BTO should have said, “That’s silly! Get the hell out of my office!”)
Ø BTO said, “Innocent passengers have been injured by Peacocks on Airline Flights”.
Ø AA said, “That’s an exaggeration! There has not been an Airline Peacock Attack since last week!”
Ø BTO said, “You may have a point. I’ll take that fact under advisement but first I will need to talk to that passenger who was attacked by that Peacock”. (What the BTO should have said, “That’s silly! Get the hell out of my office!”)
Ø AA said, “You will have to wait. He will not be out of the hospital till after Labor Day”.
Ø AA said, “I’ll bet you are not going to take the feelings of the Peacock Community into consideration, are you? Peacocks are people too. These proud sensitive animals have been raised to care for their emotionally challenged caregivers. Your preventing them from fulfilling their mission in life takes a very hard toll on their psychological makeup”.
Ø BTO said, “I never thought of that. I’ll be certain to call an emergency meeting of our Rules Committee right after lunch today to consider the very cogent point you just presented me with”. (What the BTO should have said, “That’s silly! Get the hell out of my office!”)
Ø BTO said, “While you are here, we should discuss Pooping by Birds on our planes. Our Janitorial Union has filed a grievance against this new rather unpleasant responsibility”.
Ø AA said, “Well I never! I am of a mind to file a counter grievance against their grievance with my Congressman. You may be aware that he is a proud owner of 2 Dogs, 1 Cat, an Iguana and a growing Baby Elephant. Just yesterday he told me he is planning to take a trip to his Tiny House on Lake Tahoe. You think you have trouble with my single Sensitive and Caring Peacock. You just wait!”
Ø BTO said, “Oh, my gosh and here I am only weeks before retirement!” (What the BTO should have said, “That’s silly! Get the hell out of my office!”)
The Bottom Line: As soon as our 9% Approval Rated Congress gets back from vacation it ought to pass a Federal Law that a BTO ought to be allowed to say to an AA, “That’s silly! Get the hell out of my office!”
Would I kid u?
Smartfella
Lagniappe: If you want to know more, read below but I warn you there is a lot of Silly and Frightening in this article...
Pets-on-Planes Crackdown by Airlines Gets Boost from U.S. Agency
By Alan Levin and Mary Schlangenstein
May 16, 2018
Regulators are making it easier for U.S. airlines to limit the growing number of dogs and other animals being brought onto flights by passengers saying they are needed for emotional or psychological support.
The Department of Transportation Wednesday said it won’t penalize airlines if they refuse to let passengers take aboard more than one support animal, demand assurance that a passenger has a disability or require proof of an animal’s vaccination and training. The agency also will allow airlines to impose “reasonable restrictions” on the movement of emotional-support animals in a plane’s cabin.
Service animals including seeing-eye dogs won’t be restricted under the proposed changes.
“The department has heard from the transportation industry, as well as individuals with disabilities, that the current regulation could be improved to ensure nondiscriminatory access for individuals with disabilities, while simultaneously preventing instances of fraud and ensuring consistency with other federal regulations,” the agency said in a release.
The DOT’s actions come as the three largest U.S. carriers have altered their policies on animals since the start of this year in reaction to soaring numbers of passengers claiming they needed them to provide emotional support. Those increased numbers also led to at least two incidents in which passengers were injured, including a man who suffered severe facial wounds from a dog last June on a Delta Air Lines Inc. flight.
Delta and United Continental Holdings Inc. in March began requiring 48-hour advance notice to travel with an emotional support animal, along with documents that could include proof the animal is trained and vaccinations are up to date, and a letter from a doctor or mental health worker on the person’s need for an animal or identifying the disability involved.
American Airlines Group Inc. said May 14 it will adopt similar policies July 1. The carriers have not changed policies for trained service animals used by people with visual or hearing impairments, seizures or mobility issues.
“Delta supports regulatory reform to further ensure the safety of all our customers and employees while supporting the rights of customers with legitimate needs for service animals,” said Ashton Kang, a spokeswoman.
Delta said in January it was flying about 700 service animals daily, a 150 percent increase since 2015. The company also reported an 84 percent rise since 2016 in “animal incidents,” including urine, feces and aggressive behavior.
United noted a 75 percent jump in animals on board from a year earlier, and a “significant increase” in onboard incidents involving them. American and United are banning certain animals totally from traveling in the cabin, including hedgehogs, ferrets, insects, rodents, snakes, spiders, amphibians, sugar gliders and non-household birds. American also barred those with tusks, horns or hooves, except for trained miniature horses acting as service animals.
The Transportation Department is also seeking public comment on possible new regulations to restrict the use of support animals.
The government should issue clearer guidance as soon as possible to deal with the “exponential increase” in passengers claiming the need for such animals, said Sara Nelson, international president of the Association of Flight Attendants-CWA.
“Flight attendants and passengers have been bitten, attacked and inconvenienced by animals that are not properly trained to be in a confined public environment,” Nelson said. “This is interfering with the rights of our veterans and people with disabilities who legitimately need these animals to travel.”
