More About Rest of Life Mask Guy

 A few days before I saw Rest of Life Mask Guy in Walmart I am now convinced I saw him driving past me as I was waiting to pull out onto Highway 120.

It must have been Rest of Life Mask Guy. Who else could it have been!?

Ø Every time I see a person driving in a car all by Himself with a Face Mask on I think to myself, “What is he afraid of? Is he trying to prevent himself from catching COVID from Himself?”

Ø As I was waiting to merge onto the highway I saw a car zip by going about 45 miles an hour with a Single Occupant Driver in it who had a COVID Face Mask on but this driver was different because his car was different.

The driver was driving a Convertible and the Convertible Top Was Down!

It must have been Rest of Life Mask Guy. Who else could it have been!?

************

I could stop this Blog Posting here but I’m going to Silly Analyze the Rest of Life Mask Guy a bit more...

Ø Is he going 45 miles an hour because he believes he is outrunning COVID Germs because he read on the Internet that COVID Germs travel at only 40 miles per hour?

Ø Is he terrified because he believes COVID Germs are going to envelope him if he ever has to stop because he caught a Red Light?

Ø Is he running all Red Lights that catch him?

Ø Is it his plan to open his garage door at the maximum range of his Garage Door Flicker and close the garage door as soon as he screeches to a halt inside his garage?

Ø To pull this Garage Screeching to a Halt Maneuver and have enough time to get the garage door closed is he planning to increase his speed through his sub-division above 65 miles an hour?

Ø Is he not worried about children playing in his sub-division because he knows children have not been allowed to play outside since March 12, 2020?

This is exhausting! I am so glad I am not Rest of Life Mask Guy!

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

It Was Amazing! Right After I Heard About Him On My Car Radio I Saw Him In Walmart!

I was driving on my way to Walmart a couple of days ago and the Talk Show Host told of a previous caller who told the Talk Show Host that, even though he had been vaccinated, he was going to wear a COVID Mask for the Rest of His Life.

It was like a Miracle! After I got into Walmart I actually Saw That Guy! Don’t doubt me. At first I thought my mind was playing tricks on me, but after you read this Blog Posting, I know you will agree with me that It Was Him!

To illustrate my belief I have a picture of him. I know some of my Dear Readers are Blog Skimmers and they might miss seeing the obvious (obvious to me anyway)...

Magnify the picture if you have/want to...

Ø Notice that the Rest of Life Mask Guy is wearing a Plastic Face Shield.

Ø Notice it is not just any Plastic Face Shield but it is a Deluxe Plastic Face Shield because it covers His Face and it Covers the Top of His Head.

Ø This protects Rest of Life Mask Guy from COVID Germs attacking from the front and from COVID Germs being Coughed at him by COVID Infected Birds Flying Over His Head.

Ø Obviously it would also prevent Rest of Life Mask Guy from being infected by germs that were coughed at him by NBA Basketball Players walking by him.

Ø In addition to the benefits already mentioned about the Deluxe Plastic Face Shield notice that Rest of Life Mask Guy is wearing a Regular COVID Face Mask.

Ø Notice that he is holding his Regular COVID Face Mask away from his face at the time I snapped his picture because he was having difficulty breathing because air was having a hard time getting through his Protective Barriers.

Ø Finally, he was wearing plastic gloves to make sure his hands were as well protected as his face was well protected.

I could kick myself for not having my Home Depot Contractors Tape Measure with me. If I had had it with me and I measured the distance between his mouth to the mouth of the person in front of him, I bet you it was Exactly 6 Feet.

My final proof it was Rest of Life Mask Guy is I followed him out of the store and for several miles as he went about going about. He always drove with 6 Car Lengths Between His Car and All Other Cars.

It must have been Rest of Life Mask Guy. Who else could it have been!?

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

 

Not That Good

If you are a long time Dear Reader of my Blog you will know which link in the list below made Fella say out loud, “Aw chit. Why does anyone care about this link?!”

TheHealthSite.com ... https://www.thehealthsite.com/

Apple Cider Vinegar ... Arthritis ... Ashwagandha ... Asthma ... Baby Names ... Brain Tumour ... Breast Cancer ... Cancer ... Celebrity Fitness ... Chickenpox ... Chikungunya ... Cough and cold ... Dengue ... Dengue ... Depression ... Diabetes ... Diarrhoea ... Ebola Virus ... Goitre ... Heart Attack ... Heart Failure ... Hepatitis ... HIV/AIDS ... Hypotension ... Intermittent Fasting ... International Yoga Day ... Keto Diet Tips ... Malaria ... Pneumonia ... Skin Care Tips ... Swine Flu ... Tuberculosis ... Type 2 diabetes ... Typhoid ... Weight Loss

Those of you who picked “Celebrity Fitness” (International Yoga Day came in second) will be awarded Fella’s Not Worth Much Award for Noticing Useless and Silly Stuff at the next (really the first) Foolishness...Or Is It Convention.

************

As I looked this site over I was surprised to see that it comes to us from Mumbai, India. Now I really don’t care about these Celebrities’ Plans of Action to Stay Fit because I never heard of a single one of the Celebrities. If they told me how Rhett Butler or Hopalong Cassidy or Howdy Doody kept in shape that would be interesting!

To get even further out into I Don’t Care Land I see where the site brags about their being the...“Most popular health and wellness website in India in 2012 at the Website of the Year Awards”.

Or are they saying...

In the Interest of Full Transparency We Are Compelled To Point Out That We Have Not Been A Good a Web Site for the Last 9 Years and Counting

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Little Fella Never Saw the End of The King and I

 

My family was living in a combination House and Grocery Store on Bienville Avenue in New Orleans, LA when Little Fella (me) was born in 1941. 

In 1955 our family moved to Uptown on Magazine Street. The reason for the move was so my Father could take over ownership of my Grandfather’s Grocery Store and Grandpa could retire.

Less than 2 months after we moved my Aunt Josie (also my Godmother) announced that she was going to take Little Fella and his Little Cousin Henry to see Yul Brynner in The King and I in a fancy downtown theatre.

I certainly appreciated Aunt Josie’s Birthday Gift but I was confused by her choice of Movies. I kept thinking, “Where are the cowboys?” Henry was probably confused also but he would watch any movie chosen by any aunt of ours as long as he got free popcorn.

We were watching and munching our way deep into the movie when Aunt Josie jumped up and announced that we had to leave right away! Little did we know she and we had to be someplace at a time and place which we did not know about and she and we were running out of time to get there on time.

Little Fella was a little shocked because we were only about 15 minutes away from the end of the movie and he was sure the cowboys would be riding into the movie any minute now. 

Aunt Josie was not to be deterred. She ushered us out in an agitated state and the next thing I knew she had paid the required 21 Cents for the 3 of us to ride on the Street Car and we were on our way to my new Uptown House.

Shortly after arriving home I found out the reason for Aunt Josie’s agitation. A Surprise Birthday Party had been arranged to take place in Grandpa’s Back Yard and friends from the Old Neighborhood had been imported to fill up Grandpa’s Back Yard.

I acted surprised because I was surprised.

The Late Paul Harvey is visiting with me today and he just shouted out in his late booming voice, “And Now You Know the Rest of the Story!”

The Bottom Line of the Rest of the Story is, to this very day, Little Fella Has Not Seen the End of The King and I. I have often wondered if King Yul and Anna lived Happily Ever After.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

 

Lagniappe: A Fella Wow Fact ... Yul Brynner played the role of the king in The King and I 4,625 times...Wow!

 

Grandpa’s Big House Was Across The Street From Little Fella’s Little House

My Small Self Used To Get Really Mad When This Happened

 

Little Fella to his Mother, “Mama, I want to go swimming so far out that I won’t be able to make it back and I will drown”.

Mama to Little Fella, “Fella, you can’t do that”.

Little Fella to his Mother, “Aw, Mama, why can’t I do that?”

Mama to Little Fella, “because!”.

If you were raised by a Mother like mine, the above “because!” response from her was a great stumbling block to all kinds of dangerous or stupid things you wanted to do.

************

Today Our Rulers control us and shut us down by simply telling us...

You Must Do As You Are Directed Out of An Abundance of Caution

This stops us just as short as our Mama’s “because!” used to stop us. No one today wants to be seen as being Incautious.

The latest Abundance of Caution to be thrown at us is the stopping of the use of the Johnson & Johnson Vaccine. This quote comes from a CNBC News Article...

The Food and Drug Administration asked states on Tuesday to temporarily halt using Johnson & Johnson’s Covid-19 vaccine “out of an abundance of caution” after six women in the U.S. developed a rare blood-clotting disorder that left one woman dead and another in critical condition.

If you want to Read All About It, click below...

https://www.cnbc.com/2021/04/13/us-regulators-reportedly-call-for-pause-in-use-of-johnson-johnson-vaccine-due-to-clotting-issues.html  

************

Time for some Center for Disease Control Bullet Points...

Ø There have been 6 cases a rare blood-clotting disorder out of 6,800,000 million people who have been inoculated with the Johnson & Johnson Vaccine.

Ø The blood clot incidents all occurred in women between the ages of 18 and 48.

Ø Those odds amount to 1 in 1,130,000 million, which is comparable to your annual chances of being struck by lightning (1 in 1,220,000 million).

************

Time for some Fella Foolish...Or Are They? Bullet Points...

Ø If only Women were attacked, why did they stop giving shots to Men? At a minimum they should have waited until Dead Men have a chance to catch up with Dead Women.

Ø Johnson & Johnson said in a statement that “no clear causal relationship” has been identified between the blood clots and the vaccine. This statement was immediately labeled as unconscionable when it was revealed that Johnson & Johnson’s Head of the Do Something And Do It Quickly Department got the Formula for the Vaccine by saying to that Dot on his desk, “Alexa, do you have any ideas about what would go into the makeup of a pretty good COVID Vaccine?”

Ø Is the FDA jumping to conclusions? If it had waited a couple of years would they have uncovered a disturbing trend from a Former Very Reliable Source (until it was uncovered that he did not know of which he spoke) that 129 people who had been given the Pfizer Vaccine had developed Extra Ugly Ingrown Toenails?

We would know that the FDA has figured out how to shut down the Press when we see their spokesperson respond to a pesky reporter’s pesky question about ToeNailGate by saying, “because!”.

 

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Going Round for Round and Toe To Toe with Your Insurance Company Is Permissible but Don’t Expect To Win Any of the Rounds and You Might Lose a Few Toes

 

In October of 2018 my car creped forward at a stop light and made gentle contact with the Lexus in front of me. My car has a tendency to creep because the brakes bleed off. (This issue had already been reported to my dealership service department but they said they had never heard of that happening. I let it drop because I am still sharp enough that I can tell when my dealership service department thinks I am not as sharp as I once was.) The movement was so slow that it was hard to even notice that it was happening. The contact with the Lexus was so gentle that I falsely assumed that it was a gentle bumper tap but I was wrong. The contact made 2 small marks on the Lexus that really jumped out at you if you got about 2 feet away and stared real hard with your magnifying reading glasses on. The lady who was driving the Lexus was hysterical. The facial expression on the face of the police officer indicated to me he thought she was over-the-top hysterical. The damage to my car was never repaired because I would have had trouble getting the body shop write up guy to see where it needed to be repaired. I was not ticketed.

In March of 2019 my wife was backing out of a parking spot at the Post Office to go find a better parking spot and her rear bumper made gentle contact with another car that was backing out from the adjoining spot. He got there first, so it was determined that she hit him. She did not know she had hit the other car. She got into her new spot and went into the Post Office and stood in line. The driver of the car she had “collided” with followed her into the Post Office and told her she had hit his car. She thought he was kidding. My wife was not ticketed.

************

As a result of these accidents our Insurance Rates started shooting up. We have been told that we will be under this Collision Cloud for 3 years...

Below are my car’s 6 month percentage increases since my “accident”:

Ø +40%

Ø +74%

Ø +5%

Ø +10%

Ø +14%
Total percentage increase is 119%.

Below are my wife’s 6 month percentage increases since her “accident”:

Ø +67%

Ø +7%

Ø +10%

Ø +21%
Total percentage increase is 138%

My Insurance Company tells me that at the end of 3 Years without any further accidents we will see a substantial reduction in our rates. Below I will peck out why I question their use of the word “Substantial”.

I just finished humbly crawling to my Insurance Company over the telephone. During the call we tried to work out a way to adjust coverage to save me some money. We came up with raising the Deductibles for Collision from $500 to $1,000. I was told was the highest deductible I could get.

After we finished our search for lower premiums, I asked, “How much money have I saved?”

My crack insurance representative did not blink an eye (I could tell her eye did not blink over the phone) when she told me, “The 6 month premium will go down $2.93.”

I was waiting for her to say, “$2.93 may not seem like a lot but remember that is for a 6 Month Premium. Really you are saving, $5.86 on an annual basis.”

So my Insurance Company considers $2.93 over 6 months a big deal. Remember my use of the word ‘substantial” above. I now have misgivings about the Substantial Reduction they are telling me I can look forward to after 3 years without an accident. Will they say to me without blinking an eye, “Hey, Fella, your premiums went up 119% and 138% respectively when you and your wife were so careless that each of you had 2 miniscule collisions. We are pleased to tell you that if you and your wife can drive for 3 years without an accident your rates will come down 11% and 12% respectively! If that does not get your attention, nothing will!

We got to that decrease the fairest way we know how. We added 119 and 138 across!”

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: A couple of days after talking to the $2.93 Representative I contacted my insurance company and found out that the saving was more than $2.93. It is actually $20.99. I told them . I’m back to 500 Deductible. I can afford the $20.99. It’s the rest of my Car Insurance Premiums I can’t afford.

New Category On Job Application Forms

 

When we apply for jobs we have to fill out forms. There is always a section that asks about your past or your present work history. The usual categories are always there. The one I have been using for the last 23 years is “Retired”.

There is a New Category on Job Application Forms today. It is “Resigned”...

Ø Texas Officer Resigns After Video Shows Him Toppling Teen

Ø Principal Resigns After Footage Of Him Shoving Student Surfaces

Ø Entire School Board Resigns After Getting Caught Mocking Parents

Ø Belfry Middle School Basketball Coach Resigns After Brawl

Ø Leader Of The UPF Resigns After Video Posted Mocking Him

Ø Florida High School Deputy Resigns After Not Engaging Shooter

Ø Argentina Minister Resigns After Vaccine Scandal

Ø Texas Mayor Resigns After Refusing To Help With Snowstorm

Ø Eli Lilly CFO Resigns After ‘Inappropriate’ Communications

Ø Lincoln Project Co-Founder Resigns From Board Amid A Deepening Crisis

Ø Indiana Republican Resigns Weeks After Winning Reelection

Ø Georgia Police Chief Resigns After Video Of Racist Conversation Surfaces

Ø White House Deputy Press Secretary Resigns, the Day After He Was Suspended For Issuing A Sexist And Profane Threat To A Journalist Seeking To Cover His Relationship With Another Reporter

Ø Controversial Jaguars Hire, Resigns

Ø Capitol Police Chief Resigns After Turbulent DC Protests

Ø Dodge County Attorney Resigns

Ø GOP Aide Resigns While Lashing Congressional Enablers Of This Mob

Ø Pro Football Team President Resigns

Ø CFO Resigns Citing 'Personal Reasons'

Ø Former Illinois House Speaker Resigns

I could go on but you have probably had enough. I know I have.

************

The Internet never stops trying to help us. Are you considering the possibility of Resigning? The Internet has just what you need. Here is a plethora of Sincere, Personal or Heartfelt Resignation Letters that will let those you left back at work know you were Special.

There may be some duplication in these links but duplication is the life-blood of the Internet. Were it not for duplication, we would be able to read the entire Internet during the time it takes us to drink 3 beers...

Ø Respectful Resignation Letters

Ø Graceful Resignation Letters   

Ø Best Resignation Letter Examples

Ø Positive Letters of Resignation

Ø Sincere and Appreciative Resignation Letters

Ø Heartfelt Resignation Letters Tips and Examples

George Burns who said... “Sincerity - if you can fake that, you've got it made.” 

 

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

 

Lagniappe: Above I said, “Are you considering the possibility of Resigning?”, but in today’s world, you never know if you are going to be Resigning. I saw a news article on the Internet about a CEO of a major manufacturing firm who lives in Sacramento, CA who resigned because a Video surfaced on You Tube of a guy in Bangor, Maine who looked like him kicking a puppy.

Oops! When I make something up I usually remember to tell you I made that something up. This time I forgot to tell you I made up the above Lagniappe but you already knew that...Or did you? Actually, I have seen so many I did not make up that sound like this one I did not make up I am not sure if I made this one up...Or not. 

As We Learn More About This Dire Pandemic We Get Smarter...Or do we?

Wraparound Germ Transmission Prevention Plexiglas is saving many lives during this dire Pandemic...Or is it still?

However many it has saved it now appears that some of us believe enough lives have been saved and they are moving on to save other important things.

Did you just ask yourself what can be more important than saving Human Lives? I’m not saying I understand what is happening but I do have Photographic evidence of which I am about to speak.

What I speak about is we have saved so many Human Lives we are now relocating our Wraparound Germ Transmission Prevention Plexiglas to Save Inhuman Cash Registers...

Check out the above picture and see for yourself that Costco now has the Wraparound Germ Transmission Prevention Plexiglas protecting the Cash Registers Only. 

The space where the Customer and the Employee are spewing germs at each other is Germ-Spreading Wide Open Unprotected. 

I don’t want to be too hard on Costco. They have probably noticed what Fella has noticed...

Almost every time I see one of these Wraparound Germ Transmission Prevention Plexiglas Installations I see the customer standing to one side or the other talking around the Wraparound Germ Transmission Prevention Plexiglas or his feet are on the 6’ Apart Stand Here Spots on the floor but he is contorting his body and head so that he can poke his head around the side of the Wraparound Germ Transmission Prevention Plexiglas

Costco probably said to itself, “If we can’t keep the customers safe, at least we can keep the Cash Registers Safe”.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

 

Our World Getting Too Complicated!!!

Virtual Private Networks (VPNs) are a great way to prevent all those Evils out there from having their way with and doing bad things to us.

I have not had a VPN very long but I have now been confronted with 2 circumstances where I am told to Disable my VPN if I want to be able to connect with what I am trying to connect with.

Strangely enough (when you consider that you use a VPN for Security) is many banks (including mine) will not let you connect if you have a VPN trying to keep you secure.

************

Today I found out that Amazon Prime tells me I can’t see their Informational Link about Amazon Prime Movies if I have my VPN watching over me.

When I look at their link to get information about their Movies, I see this message...

Your device is connected to the Internet using a VPN or proxy service. Please disable it and try again. For more help, go to amazon.com/pv-vpn.

When I go to the URL they suggest (amazon.com/pv-vpn), see this Unbelievably Complicated and Confusing Information...

Issues While Playing Prime Video Titles

What to do when Prime Video titles won't play or if you see error codes such as 1007, 1022, 7003, 7005, 7031, 7135, 7202, 7203, 7204, 7206, 7207, 7230, 7250, 7251, 7301, 7303, 7305, 7306, 8020, 9003, 9074.

Ø Close the Prime Video app on your device (or your web browser, if you're watching on your computer).

Ø Restart your computer or connected device.

Ø Ensure that your device or web browser has the latest updates.

Ø Ensure that you’re not using the same account on multiple devices - you can only stream the same title to two devices at a time.

Ø Ensure that any external device is connected to your TV or display using an HDMI cable that is compatible with HDCP 1.4 (for HD content) or HDCP 2.2 (for UHD and/or HDR content).

Ø Pause other Internet activity – especially if other devices are using the network at the same time.

Ø Check your Internet connection. You may need to restart your connected device and/or router.

Ø If you’re able to connect to the Internet on other devices, update your connect device’s DNS settings. Please check with your device’s manufacturer for further details.

Ø If you’re attempting to control a device using Alexa, try to unpair then re-pair the device in the Alexa app.

Ø Disable any VPN or proxy servers.

For more help, try our Prime Video forum 

************

This is why the wordwas invented!

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Want To Be A Pilot? Become The Best Pilot And You Will Be A Pilot...Or Will You Be?

 

Let's Think About This...

ØOnce Upon a Time there was a White Male Human Being (I'll call him Sidney) who had always wanted to be a Commercial Airline Pilot.

ØAll of his education was directed toward gaining the skills required to become a Commercial Airline Pilot.

ØWhen he finished his Check Ride for his Private Pilot’s License his Check Ride Instructor said to him, “From the first day we rode together, I always felt safer when you had the controls instead of when I had the controls. It was an honor to be your instructor.”

ØAfter years of hard work Sidney is finally officially qualified (for years he has been Fully Qualified but now he has taken all the training and taken all the tests to be Officially Qualified) to become a Commercial Airline Pilot.

ØNot everyone knows that here is an elaborate Pilot Evaluation Computer System that ranks the Country’s Candidates who are vying to become Commercial Airline Pilots.

ØSidney has been ranked as the Most Qualified Candidate for the last 5 year in a row. 

One sad day Sidney gets a letter from the CEO of United Airlines saying, “Even though you are the Country’s Most Qualified Pilot Candidate we will not be hiring you to become one of our new Pilots. I am pleased to tell you that next time you are a passenger on one of our flights we will be sure to offer you your choice of an extra bag of Peanuts or Pretzels”.

Several months later Sidney is working at his job as a Part-Time Busboy at the local Country Club and he sees the CEO of United Airlines in the Member’s Lounge.

Sidney humbly asks the CEO why his application to become a Pilot for his airline was turned down. The CEO is a very straight shooter. He tells the Part-Time Busboy, “We are in the midst of 9 Year Hiring Program where we only hire Women and People of Color. I can see that you do not fall into either category. So there was no chance in hell of your being offered a position with us”.

Sidney then makes the mistake of humbly asking, “Is there any chance that one of the pilots who was hired instead of me was piloting that United Jet that crashed last Wednesday killing 256 people?”

The Very Straight Shooting CEO says, “How do you know about that?” He then calls for the Country Club’s Security Guard and has the Humble Former Qualified Pilot Candidate and Former Part-Time Busboy thrown out of the Country Club on his very qualified head.

Not too long ago the Former #1 Most Qualified Pilot Candidate was closing the Gap on his life-long dream of becoming a Commercial Pilot. Now he is the #1 Stock Boy At The GAP.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

How To Get Those Basketball Players To Come Out In Favor Of Georgia’s Photo ID Voting Requirement

Require that all voting in all future elections be held at Coca-Cola World Headquarters...

If Coca-Cola says Photo ID is OK, you know  

It Is OK!

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe:  

Half-Mast Is The Position, Roughly Halfway Down A Flagpole, To Which A Flag Is Lowered As A Sign Of Respect When An Important Person Dies...Or Is It?

 

I drove past our Post Office the other day and the flag was at Half-Mast...Again. The city I live in could save a lot of taxpayer money when buying and installing Flagpoles in the future by buying poles that are half as long as they used to buy.

(Maybe the above wise crack does not make a lot of sense but I’m going to forge ahead with this Blog Posting anyway.)

There was a time when we saw a flag on a flagpole at half-mast and we would turn on the radio to hear about which one our Leaders, Explorers, Sports Figures or Rulers had died.

We could also look around and we would usually see a newsboy with a bunch of newspapers under his arm holding one of them up above his head and shouting, ”Read All About It!” and, of course, we would rush up and give a nickel to the shouting boy so we could Read All About It.

Today we are treating our Flagpoles like Participation Trophies. We give out trophies to bewildered children and hoist up flags half-way up flagpoles like they were not important.

Let your mind wander with me for a few moments. Think how much less time we would have to teach our children Reading, Writing and Arithmetic if we began each school day by calling every student up on the stage in the school’s auditorium to receive their Perfect Attendance For Today Certificate.

If Everything Is Special, Nothing Is Special

Before I came to an understanding about how un-special the Flagpole had become I wasted a lot of times trying to find out what momentous happening had happened. I understood how far we had slid down the flagpole went one day I rushed over to City Hall, burst into the Mayor’s Palatial Office and shouted, “What momentous happening has happened?!”

There sat my Mayor with an almost empty box of Kleenex in front of her patting her mascara dripping eyes as she replied, “Cuddles has died!” I shouted back, “What’s a Cuddles?” She moaned back, “My Cat!”

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

 

 

Should I Be Thankful That They Work So Hard To Confuse Me?

 

I have hearing problem. If the person talking to my ears is a Heavily Accented Person, I just can’t understand what the heck they are saying.

There is such a large economic benefit to companies I reach out to across the World Wide Web to hire people who I can’t understand it looks like I’m just going to have to live with the confusion.

Here is what actually happened on a call a few days ago. I got a letter from a Credit Card Company concerning my dispute of a $230 charge for a product I never received. The letter so confused me that I called my Credit Card Company’s Customer Service Department.

The letter stated the following...

Ø We have received a $230 credit from this merchant; therefore, the conditional credit of $230 on your account is now permanent.

Ø We previously issued a conditional credit of $230 to your account pending the outcome of our investigation. Now that the investigation is complete, we have again charged your account $230.

I told my Heavily Accented Customer Service Representative that it appears I was charged $230 then had a credit of $230 and now I have a second charge of $230. It looks like I was charged 2 times for $230 and credited 1 time for $230. This means I am paying $230 for the cost of the disputed product I did not get.

Now things really started going downhill...

Ø My Heavily Accented Representative now knows she is talking to an Ignorant Accented Person and tells me that I am confused because my dispute has actually been decided in my favor.

Ø I say how can that be?...
>I go on to say I was charged $230 2 times and credited $230 1 time, therefore, I have paid $230 for a product I did not get.
>I add, “This means the letter is wrong”.

Ø My Heavily Accented Representative contradicts me and says the letter is not wrong...
>She goes on to say it is I who am wrong because I am paying attention to the second paragraph.
>She adds, I should ignore the second paragraph and only pay attention to the first paragraph.
>She finishes up with, “This means the letter is right and you are wrong”.

My dear readers, you are not often proud of me but on this occasion you ought to be proud of me. I kept cool and asked her to repeat that explanation about ignoring and paying attention to this paragraph and that paragraph and, believe it or not, she did it again with all the conviction that she was talking to an Ignorant Accented Person and she must keep her cool when talking to such a Fella.

I let it drop. I plan to wait till the statements come in showing all the debit(s) and all the credit(s) and, if I have more debits than credits, I will call back and hope I get someone who is not a Heavily Accented Representative who I can understand and who can understand me (an Ignorant Accented Person).

The above paragraph may prove that I am an idiot. What do you think are my chances of that happening?

Since I started this Blog Posting another Dispute has been resolved and I have received a letter. Thank heaven the Confusing Second Paragraph was not included.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: Here is what I think happened right after she hung up the phone. She said to herself, “What an idiot!” I think there is a good chance that she did not take that much pleasure in her after-the-hang-up-parting-shot-at-my-intelligence because she was so Heavily Accented she did not understand what she said to herself.