If Only Members Of Congress Were As Upfront With Us As Racecar Drivers

Racecar Drivers plainly tell us who their sponsors are (who gives them money).

Just as Racecar Drivers do, Members of Congress ought to be required to wear “sponsor” patches on their $1,200 suits.

The only problem I see with this very logical plan is we would have to require that all Members of Congress be 7’ 5” tall. If they were shorter than this height, they would not be able to find enough space to give credit where credit is due.

One final thought. If we had to limit Members of Congress to people 7’ 5” tall, we might not find enough tall people to fill up the Halls of Congress. That would be terrible! … Or would it?

Would I kid u?

Is Indefinitely The Same As Never?

I will not use space in this Foolishness...Or Is It? to accuse or defend former governor Bla Go Je Vich of Illinois. Instead I will go after our silly Judicial System...Again.

This country has spent years and lots of money...

• Trying Bla Go Je Vich.
• Trying Bla Go Je Vich again.
• Watching many reports about whether his hair was his hair.
• Following him around as he jogged.
• Watching him signing autographs outside of courtrooms.

After seeing him convicted on 17 of 20 different corruption charges and being told that he could face up to 300 years in jail, we said to our collective selves, “Selves, It’s a slam dunk! It is over! He got what he deserves! Our Judicial System works after all!”

Or does it?

On September 29, 2011 I read the following, “Rod Blagojevich, the Illinois governor charged with several corruption convictions, has had his sentencing delayed indefinitely by a federal judge.”

Is Indefinitely the Same as Never?

Would I kid u?

The Number One Thing Americans Fear

Multiple Choice Question:

What is the thing that our society fears the most?

Possible Answers:

Terrorists or Violent Crime or The Boogie Man or Congress or Lawyers

I know for certain that most of you answered Congress. While I agree with you that that bunch is quite troubling to all of us, I think that the correct answer just might be Lawyers.

In truth our society is more and more being structured to defend itself against them.

To make my point, here are the details an incident that happened near where I live…

• A child’s backpack (with child attached) got caught in the closed doors of a school bus as said caught child (and backpack) were exiting the bus.
• The bus moved for 41 feet before the bus driver stopped the bus.
• The child and backpack were not injured.
• This incident happened on Friday afternoon and uncaught child was back in school on Monday morning.
• The School System’s Director of Transportation met with the student’s guardian before school on Monday and presented the child with a new Book Bag.

I would not have been surprised if Jack Nicholson had been there on Monday to tell the child that she was being given a Book Bag and not a Backpack because, “You can’t handle a Backpack!”.

All is well that ends well. No one was hurt. No one was fired. On one missed school. No Problem!

There was one problem. The School System was absolutely scared to death that there were going to be Law Suits, Lawyers all over the place and Claims of Loss of Sleep, Mental Anguish and Extreme Trauma.

The School System felt obligated to take the follow precautions to get ready for The Lawyers, in case they appeared…

• Emergency Responders were called out in force to the scene of the non-injury causing incident.
• Counselors contacted the parents of every of remaining student on the bus at the time of the non-injury causing incident.

I wonder what the Counselors told the parents of the remaining bus rider’s parents? … “It is my duty to inform you that your dear child was not involved in a non-injury causing incident that did involve another dear little child. If your child had been injured, he or she would have been injured but since he or she was not injured he or she received no injury. We are thankful that the involved child herself was also not injured but, if she had been injured, she would have been”.

I also wonder how many man hours were devoted to determining whether the bus had moved 40 or 41 or 42 feet?

Would I kid u?

NOTE: Don’t blame me… BlogSpot (Google) is responsible for those ads at the bottom of my Foolishness.

They Know What They Are Talking About ... Or Do They?

The above subject refers to “they”. “They” sure give me a lot to blog about.

This time “they” are medical people.  Medical people are definitely smarter than I am. So I must be wrong...Or am I?

At the present time hospitals and doctors use a system of about 18,000 codes to describe medical services in bills they send to insurers. 18,000 is enough of anything...Or is it?

The Federal Government now thinks that 18,000 codes do not get the job done. Under a new federally mandated Medical-Billing Coding List which stipulates that more detailed coding is a must, the number of codes is about to increase to 140,000.

Still not convinced? Still thinking to yourself that this is about medical stuff and, when it comes to medical stuff, you have to be specific. The Smartfella? is here to tell you, Think Again.

Here are a few of the kinds of specificity you get when you decide that 140,000 is just about the right number:

• Patient was injured in a chicken coop.
• Patient was injured in an opera house.
• Patient was injured in an art gallery.
• Patient was injured on a squash court.
• Patient was injured in nine different locations in and around mobile homes.
• Patient had a bizarre personal appearance.
• Patient walked into a lamppost, initial encounter.
• Patient walked into a lamppost, subsequent encounter.
• Patient was injured while sewing.
• Patient was injured while ironing.
• Patient was injured while playing a brass instrument.
• Patient was injured while crocheting.
• Patient was injured while doing handicrafts.
• Patient was injured while knitting.
• Patient was injured by a water-ski that was on fire.
• Nine codes each for injurious encounters with a duck, a macaw, a parrot, a goose, turkey or a chicken.
• Patient was injured by being bitten by a turtle.
• Patient was injured by being struck by a turtle.
• There used to be a single code for suturing an artery but now there will be 195 codes for suturing arteries.
• There used to be a single code for a badly healed fracture but now there will be 2,595 codes for badly healed fractures.
• Patient was injured as a result of an encounter with an alien.

In the above rundown I poked fun at 2,870 of the 140,000 codes. Due to my reputation for foolishness some of you are saying to yourselves, “Selves, he did it again. He zeroed in on the only 2,870 that could be construed as foolish. The remaining 137,130 are truly serious and important codes that will be of great benefit to the medical and insurance communities here in the Good Ole USofA.”

Everyone is entitled to his own stupid opinion. If that is what you believe then that is what you believe...Or do you?

Would I kid u?

We All Deserve The Fast Lane

We have all become accustomed to High Occupancy Vehicle (HOV) Lanes. In our area we have now moved to High Occupancy Toll (HOT) Lanes.

This is progress! ... Or is it?

Here is how HOT Lanes work...

• 73,000 transponders have been issued to drivers interested in using the fast HOT Lanes.
• Vehicles that have three occupants can drive in the HOT Lanes without charge.
• Vehicles that have fewer than three can use the HOT Lanes but they will have to pay a toll.
• Depending on how heavy the traffic is at the time that the lane is being used, the toll can range anywhere from ten to ninety cents a mile.

Officials have been quoted as saying, “This provides a transportation advantage to people in that corridor who are willing to pay for that advantage”.

As you would expect controversy surrounds this progressive step. There are a lot of lawyers who are chomping at the bit to file law suits. The basis for their anger, as is so often the case in the Good Ole USofA, is Fairness.

I again posed as a fly on the wall in the palatial law offices of one of the law firms heading up this fight back against unfairness and here is what I uncovered...

The law suits will contend that it is unfair that these fast lanes will be limited to the rich and that working folk should be allowed to get to Wal-Mart just as fast as moneyed people.

In my opinion, everyone ought to be required to use only the fast lanes. It ought to be against the law to drive in any of those other six lanes.

Why should only the rich get to go fast?

Would I kid u?

I Remember Gary Cuozzo

In 1967 the New Orleans Saints joined the National Football League. Gary Cuozzo was their first Quarterback. One of the other QBs was Billy Kilmer.

Cuozzo was wonderful until his glaring weakness came to light. His glaring weakness was his football team was terrible. That did not stop the fans from deciphering that Kilmer was the solution to all the ills of the Saints.

After awhile Kilmer was given his chance and our coach (who had no fear because his name was Tom Fears) replaced Cuozzo with Kilmer.

That did not fix the problems of the Saints because the Saints were still terrible but that did not deter the fans from chanting, “We want Cuozzo! We want Cuozzo!”

What’s my point? Don’t you see it? Gary Cuozzo is still out there but during this election cycle his name was Rick Perry, now it is Chris Christie and during the last election cycle his name was Fred Thompson.

In 2008 there was a genuine huge groundswell for Fred Thompson until he declared himself to be a candidate and then he was gone almost overnight.

I remember him appearing at his coming out party (actually it was a State Fair in someplace like Nebraska). He got out of his vehicle and started walking around shaking hands with the folks.

It took about three minutes for a Talking Head to comment that he had on $300 Loafers. She explained her keen observation by pointing out that he was obviously out of touch with the Working Shoes Wearing Nebraskans because he was wearing $300 Loafers.

He was toast. He was done. He was gone so fast that the folks were left wondering if he had ever announced for the presidency at all.

When I heard that Talking Head make her “Brilliant” $300 Loafers Comment, I actually thought I heard someone in the distance chanting, “We want Cuozzo! We want Cuozzo!”

Would I kid u?

Jobs … Jobs … Jobs

Please note the Gadget on the left called “Share it”. If you are entertained by this Foolishness (or one in the future), use “Share it” to tell your friends or enemies about it on Facebook or Twitter.

In my subject line above I only pecked out the word “Jobs” three times. James Hoffa (the one we can find) is a lot more articulate that I am. In that speech he gave on September 5th, he said “Jobs” seven times in a row.

I agree we need jobs. Creating jobs is what all our politicians are making speeches about during this current never-ending presidential campaign. My question is can they really “create” jobs?

Sister Mary Rita taught me that only God can create something out of nothing.

I realize that some politicians act godlike but I must side with the politicians on this one. When I was in my little uniform, I would never have dared to quibble with Sister Mary Rita about any of her definitions but I am full grown now and am not near as afraid of her as I used to be. As our rulers are currently using it, there is a distinction in this use of the word “create” for this simple reason…

Our political leaders are not creating something out of nothing. They are creating something out of a gigantic mess.

I would become truly concerned if my leaders started saying these kinds of things in order to create more jobs...

• We need more wildfires (workers would be needed to put out the fires).
• We need a lot of rioting (workers needed to put out fires and chase the rioters and looters around trying to arrest a few of them).
• We need a lot more hurricanes (workers needed to set up emergency shelters and serve food).

If our rulers started advocating any of the above, Sister Mary Rita and I are going to have to make a trip to Washington, D.C. and have a talk with those guys.

Notice I did not say the catastrophes above would have created more jobs for reporters. We already have an unlimited supply of people with their unique “skills”.

Would I kid u?

The Root Cause Of England’s Problems

I read in my local newspaper the following…

Prison authorities said they faced an "unprecedented situation" and were working on emergency plans to boost capacity "should further pressure be placed on the prison estate”.

Do you now see what the problem is over there in England? Those awful people went out and looted, broke things, beat up and mugged people and Scotland Yard put them up in estates.

I hear some of those Country Estates over there can be pretty nice.

Would I kid u?

That Was Then … This Is Now

Now that The Ten Commandments have been officially changed to The Ten Interesting Suggestions is it okay to hang these Suggestions in our courthouses?

Would I kid u?

Coming To The Defense Of Our Congress

I just read a columnist’s opinion piece in which he took the position that our Congress cannot do two things at the same time.

It must really be hard to be a conscientious member of The Congress of the United States of America and be really trying to do your best while constantly being under attack by an ungrateful public…

• I honestly believe that this commentator is being too harsh on our hard working Congress.
• Our Congress has on more than one occasion demonstrated its ability to multitask.
• The most recent example is their valiant attempts to reduce its own Wasteful Spending while, at the same time, voting to throw away lots more of our tax payer funds on New Forms of Wasteful Spending.

Did you really think I was going to come to their defense?

Would I kid u?

NOTE: Don’t blame me… BlogSpot (Google) is responsible for those ads at the bottom of my Foolishness.

His Plan Once Was Going To Be My Plan. It Was A Great Plan But Now It Is A Terrible Plan.

Please note the Gadget on the left called “Share it”. If you are entertained by this Foolishness (or one in the future), use “Share it” to tell your friends or enemies about it on Facebook or Twitter.

In past years I was a Fly on the Wall specializing in walls that belonged to Politicians Running for Office.
It was a lot of fun and immensely informative. If you are ever given the opportunity to be Political Fly, I recommend you jump at the chance (be sure to keep one of your many fly eyes looking out for swatters).
My years as a fly taught me that Political Runners always take different positions from other Political Runners. They feel that they must do this. They have to set themselves apart.
Many times they end up with positions on issues that are hard to defend but, in their small minds, it is better to be different than to be understood.
If they get into trouble, they know they can always change the subject or answer a different question.
All of the above has been a set up to this Foolishness…Or Is It? below is the meat of this posting … Are you excited?
Here is how it works…

• A Political Runner has an Opposing Runner who was an extremely successful businessman, has been a Senator for two and a half terms, is so popular that every member of the congress attends his birthday party every year and fights for the honor of taking to the podium to praise his talents and proclaim their admiration for him, is a war hero and is the loving father of 7 children all of whom are doctors and lawyers who do not take salaries but have devoted their lives to treating and representing the poor and downtrodden.
• The Political Runner’s campaign ads refer to the Opposing Runner as “The Dummy”.
• The Opposing Runner has just announced a Bullet-Proof Plan That Will Fix All Of The Ills Of The Good Ole USofA In Six Weeks.
• The Political Runner is really upset because … word for word … this is the exact same plan that the Political Runner was about to announce as his own plan.
• The Political Runner quickly comes up with a different plan.
• Throughout their Campaign War Room the Political Runner’s Staff are saying, “Our guy’s new plan will not work nearly as well as The Dummy’s plan and will probably send the country spiraling into another Great Depression but that’s the way it has to be because we have to separate ourselves”.
• The Political Runner fully agrees with his staff’s prediction about the next Great Depression but he says to himself, “I have no choice. I have to be different”.
• The Political Runner and his campaign staff then spend the next three hours before Happy Hour starts coming up with Half Truths, Nit Picks, Outright Lies and Obfuscations about The Dummy’s Bullet-Proof Plan That Will Fix All Of The Ills Of The Good Ole USofA In Six Weeks.

Am I being too cynical?
Would I kid u?
NOTE: Don’t blame me… BlogSpot (Google) is responsible for those ads at the bottom of my Foolishness.

Lying Is Bad … Or Is It?

Please note the Gadget on the left called “Share it”. If you are entertained by this Foolishness (or one in the future), use “Share it” to tell your friends or enemies about it on Facebook or Twitter.

Roger Clements is in deep trouble for Lying To Congress.

I’m confused again…

Why do we get so upset about someone who has Lied To Congress but Lying While In Congress is considered to be nothing more than a Pre-Happy Hour Activity?

Would I kid u?

What’s Wrong With Us? … (I may have used this Foolishness Title before but I’ve got to use again it because IT IS A PERFECT FIT!)

Please note the Gadget on the left called “Share it”. If you are entertained by this Foolishness (or one in the future), use “Share it” to tell your friends or enemies about it on Facebook or Twitter.

Maybe I could have called this posting … What’s Wrong With Us Part 2? Actually, the way the world around us is coming apart there will very likely be Parts 3 & 4 & 5 & ?.

Is anyone out there reading Ernest Hemingway or Plato or any kind of History Book?

I am agitated this time about  Twitter or Tweeting and/or those who proudly proclaim, “I am a twit and proud of it”.

What really caught my attention was the sheer volume of people (called “followers”) who spend their time reading about what celebrities pump out via their Twitter Sites.

I have found a web site that quantifies how many Followers are out there reading their celebrities’ last Tweet and/or anxiously waiting for the next Tweet. What this all means is I wasted my time finding out about all the people who are wasting their time.

Here are the Top Two Twitter Sites and how many Followers each has:

• Lady Gaga has 13,178,568.
• Justin Bieber has 12,347,684.

(Conservative Voters Take Note: As of August 1, 2011 Michele Bachmann and Mitt Romney have yet to go over 100,000.)

Can these Followers really believe that their Celebrities are sitting at their computers or stabbing at their smart phones to send to them their inner most thoughts, feelings and concerns?

To my way of thinking, the Celebs don’t even hire humans to tweet to their adoring public for them. They probably have computer programs that generate a myriad of feel good nonsense.

Things like the following are making Twit’s Hearts all over the Good Ole USofA skip a beat…

• I just had a Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich. Boy was that good!
• Today I went to the beach in my new bikini. OMG! I really caused a ruckus!
• I went shopping today on Rodeo Drive. I bought a $7,000 necklace. I can’t wait to go out tonight and knock ‘em dead at Chez Louie Restaurant!
• I just had a Jelly and Peanut Butter Sandwich. Boy was that good!

Shaquille O’Neal has 4,274,939 Followers. When he decided to retire he did it through his Twitter Account. He actually told his fans that he wanted them to be “first to know” of his decision.

First to Know?

I wonder if each of the 4,274,939 felt that Shaquille thought they were so special that  he had sent them a personal Tweet straight from his big heart and that he personally pecked out his Tweet with his own big fingers.

Can’t you just hear each of the Twits saying to himself, “He did not tell anyone but me”.

Would I kid u?

NOTE: Don’t blame me… BlogSpot (Google) is responsible for those ads at the bottom of my Foolishness.

Girlie Men & Proud Of It…Or Are They?

Please note the Gadget on the left called “Share it”. If you are entertained by this Foolishness Posting (or one in the future), use “Share it” to tell your friends about it on Facebook or Twitter.

There are times when I get the feeling that I don’t understand anything.

I have repeatedly seen a TV Commercial that shows a hairy man using the advertised little shaving product removing hair from his arms and his chest. He is smiling. He seems happy to be de-hairing himself on camera. There is no evidence that anyone is holding a gun to his head.

What’s wrong with my fellow American Males? We should be proud of our hair. We he-men once knew that Hairs R Us.

God in heaven probably has been confused by a lot of the things done by mankind over the eons but this one must have him as perplexed as any of his creation’s other bumbling. If he has a drawing board, he has probably gone back to it.

However, there is an opportunity here for entrepreneurs to make money. If men are shaving off hair, why not sell the idea that women ought to put on hair?

Can’t you just hear the “Only On TV” ads touting women buying clumps of paste-on hair? …

“But wait! Buy now and we will send you two, yes two, of our finest discarded hair Paste-On Clumps. This hair was caught as it fell from a hair discarding male before it hit the ground by the Hollywood Celebrity of Your Choice. Don’t wait. Quantities are limited because some of these girlie men appear to be having second thoughts about what the heck they are doing. Get your Girlie Clumps now before the Girlie Men come to their senses.”

John Wayne is dead.

Would I kid u?

NOTE: Don’t blame me… BlogSpot (Google) is responsible for those ads at the bottom of my Foolishness.

If Roger Miller Were Alive, He Would Turn Over In His Grave

Considering what has been happening in England lately, do you think ole Roger could stand up in front of us today and sing…

England swings like a pendulum do

Bobbies on bicycles two by two

Westminster Abbey

The Tower of Big Ben

The rosy red cheeks of the little children

I saw in the paper while everything was coming apart over there there was consideration of giving the police new “powers” to combat the lawlessness.

If this new “power” sounds a little silly to you that means your head is screwed on correctly.

The “power” under consideration was the authority to tell masked looters, rioters, arsonists, muggers or vandals that they had to take off their masks.

This started my foolishness juices flowing. Does this mean that it is only against the law in England to loot, riot, set things on fire, mug or vandalize if you are wearing a mask?

Carrying the Foolishness…Or Is It? further, once that the mask had been removed, would English Bad Persons then have been allowed to continue with the evil deeds that they had chosen that day’s activity?

Would I kid u?

NOTE: Don’t blame me… BlogSpot (Google) is responsible for those ads at the bottom of my Foolishness.

Talking Heads & Pundits … Dumb & Dumber

I copied the excerpts below from a news article about the Chinook Crash a short while back. It got me very agitated.

I always get agitated at Talking Heads and Pundits when they try to sound like experts while having no expertise except their mouths and/or their word processors.

The “Allen” in the quote below is an U.S. Army General...

“Allen defended the decision to send in the Chinook loaded with special operations forces to pursue insurgents escaping from the weekend firefight with Army Rangers in a dangerous region of Wardak province of eastern Afghanistan.”

• Are they upset because they were going after the bad guys? That's what our fighting forces do. That's why they are called "fighting forces".
• Are they upset because our fighting forces were sent into "a dangerous region"? They are trained to go into dangerous regions.

“Questions remain about why the troops were called in to aid other U.S. combatants engaged in a firefight”…

• Huh?
• Can they really be questioning why they were sent in to aid their fellow combatants?

  Al Capp of Li’l Abner Fame used to say he was,

“An Expert on Nothing with an Opinion on Everything.”

 

Al Capp was a humorist. These Talking Heads are not supposed to be funny. They are also better than Al Capp ever was at being Experts on Nothing with Opinions on Everything.

Would I kid u?

More Foolishness…

Al Capp also was the creator of the mascot symbol for the high school I went to in New Orleans … The Fighting Blue Jay

I bet you can hardly contain your emotions after gazing upon this little bird.  

NOTE: Don’t blame me… BlogSpot (Google) is responsible for those ads at the bottom of my Foolishness.

It’s Presidential Election Time Again…Have You Noticed?

Yes it is time to be bombarded about the Presidential Election…again. That’s the bad news. The worst news is it has already been going on for a long time and it is going to be going on all the way until November of NEXT year. There ought to be a law to prevent this because this is Cruel and Unusual Punishment.
We are presently involved picking our next ruler and much of what we do to pick our next ruler does not make sense. We have certain standards and our standards many times have nothing to do with the qualifications that an office seeker ought to have.
Would you vote for a president who was bald? You just said to yourself that you certainly would but would you really do that?
Here is a list of disqualifiers that would certainly be hot discussion topics by the folks back home if such candidates were offered up for consideration to be President of the United States of America.
Coffee Shop Conversation…

• “That guy has a brilliant organized mind, is highly educated and has 22 years of experience in the successful governance of the largest city in America but I could never vote for him because he is too fat.”
• “That guy has an impeccably flawless ability to analyze any situation correctly and determine the proper course of action but he is too short.”
• “I see what you are saying. I fully agree that he is the only one who could possible save us from the impending doom that is upon us but do you see that huge space between his front teeth? When you get right down to it, you can’t trust anyone with a gap that big.”

Again the Smartfella? does not just make silly things up. He is very proud that he has an unblemished record of proposing specific and detailed plans of action to remedy what he makes silly about.
I say put the name of everyone wanting to be president into a hat and have Justin Bieber reach in and pick out our next ruler.
I can hear you saying, “That would be foolish”. My comeback to you is … “Are you telling me that the way we do it now is not foolish?”
On the other hand, why don’t be forget the hat and simply appoint Justin Bieber to the job. He may not be qualified but he is Good Looking, he has Great Hair and, most importantly, he does not have a gap in his front teeth.
The best part is he could go out on the North Portico on weekends and sing to his subjects all across The Fruited Plain.
Would I kid u?
NOTE: Don’t blame me… BlogSpot (Google) is responsible for those ads at the bottom of my Foolishness.

What A Straw Poll Is Is A Mystery But I Do Wish It Were Better At Being Whatever It Is

Go ahead and admit it, you do not know what a Straw Poll is, do you?

Please allow me to help you come to a better understanding of just what a Straw Poll really is. Of course I will be using the Iowa State Fair Straw Poll in Ames, Iowa to instruct you. The Iowa Straw Poll is a confusing political exercise which is a testament to...

• The presidential candidate who has the best organized political organization behind him/her.
• The presidential candidate who has the best organized political organization behind him/her who has the biggest tent.
• The presidential candidate who has the best organized political organization behind him/her who has the biggest tent who serves the best BBQ.
• The presidential candidate who has the best organized political organization behind him/her who has the biggest tent who serves the best BBQ and the most busses to ride the eaters from the BBQ to the place where the voting is being done.

Now do you understand?

Referring back to the Subject of this Foolishness...Or Is It?, “I Do Wish It Were Better At Being Whatever It Is”. Can you imagine how much better off we would all be if the Iowa Straw Poll were an exact, infallible, never-been-wrong predictor of who the next President of the good ole USofA was going to be?

It the Iowa Straw Poll was that good, we could do away with the agony of the rest of the Presidential Campaign and just wait for the Inauguration.

We would all be spared the awful ordeal we are about to endure. Instead we could just take naps in front of the TV while Talking Heads just sat there staring straight ahead with nothing to say. It would be like watching CSPAN for the next 14 months.

There it is. You are now educated about Straw Polls. The only question left unanswered is... What Does Straw Have to Do with All of This?

Would I kid u?

I’m Not Sure What Diversity Really Is But I know This Is Ridiculous

In this Foolishness…Or Is It? I am taking off my Silly Hat and am donning my Reporter Hat. I am going to just report on what I have read and maybe, just maybe, some bit of foolishness will show its silly head.

My source if information is the Wall Street Journal which reported on what a Heather Mac Donald wrote in www.city-journal.org.

I know about the WSJ but I am not familiar with City Journal or Heather Mac Donald (or why she puts a space between the “Mac” and the “Donald”) but that is okay because neither it nor she is familiar with me.

Heather Mac Donald wrote recently about California’s budget crisis and how a spokesman for the University of California said, “Our campuses and the UC Office of the President already have cut to the bone.” Heather Mac Donald goes on to disagree with this “cut to the bone” contention, when it comes to the area of Diversity.

The following is a quote from her July 14, 2011 article…

“Not only have diversity sinecures been protected from budget cuts, their numbers are actually growing. The University of California at San Diego, for example, is creating a new full-time “vice chancellor for equity, diversity, and inclusion.” This position would augment UC San Diego’s already massive diversity apparatus, which includes the Chancellor’s Diversity Office, the associate vice chancellor for faculty equity, the assistant vice chancellor for diversity, the faculty equity advisors, the graduate diversity coordinators, the staff diversity liaison, the undergraduate student diversity liaison, the graduate student diversity liaison, the chief diversity officer, the director of development for diversity initiatives, the Office of Academic Diversity and Equal Opportunity, the Committee on Gender Identity and Sexual Orientation Issues, the Committee on the Status of Women, the Campus Council on Climate, Culture and Inclusion, the Diversity Council, and the directors of the Cross-Cultural Center, the Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender Resource Center, and the Women’s Center.”

Whatever happened to Reading, Writing and Arithmetic?

This is the area of any Foolishness…Or Is It? where I say something foolishness or silly or tongue in cheek or smart alecky or wise guyish but this time I am at a loss for words. Could the above quote actually be true. Could their diversity apparatus listing really be that long? I must have made it up…Or did I?

If you want to see if I made the quote up, you can go read the entire article at…

http://www.city-journal.org/2011/cjc0714hm.html 

or you could just trust me.

Have I ever kidded u?

Note: For the record, I did not read the entire article. It has 1,762 words and is 17 paragraphs long. I just found the Diversity Explosion Listing, stopped reading and started in on my Blog Posting.

An America Living Inside Cubicles Would Be A Better America

W.C Fields was known for his crazy humor. He was also well known for his dislike of children. He many times said that he thought children should be raised inside a barrel and fed through a hole. I think he may have been on to something really worth thinking about with this comedy bit of his.

Don’t get me wrong. I am not advocating his Barrel Feeding Plan for our children. I am thinking he had a point; if you think of the barrel idea as an analogy for my idea that the good ole USofA might be better off if it were segmented into cubicles. Cubicles would isolate us from each other and that would be good. Please allow me to explain (this is going to be a hard one to explain)…

Because of our world of instant communication, we spread news very fast. Some of this news is not helpful to society.

Let’s say an awful person in New Hampshire does some gruesome thing. Within moments an awful person in Oregon who has the potential to be a gruesome person sees what his fellow awful person in New Hampshire has done and says to himself, “Self, that is a very gruesome thing to have done to someone else. Why did not I think of that?”

After a momentary disappointment in his own inability to come up with new gruesome ideas on his own, he thinks, “I’m going to do that terrible thing too”. This is how the modern world spreads evil.

My wish is that different parts of America were divided into Isolated Cubicles. If we were so divided, we would not spread our evilness all over this country.

Cubicle Living, as great an idea as it is, does have its drawbacks…

• In the Cubicle America the modern phenomena of getting Tattoos all over our bodies would still be contained inside the originating cubicle. That would really be a shame … Or would it?
• If we lived inside Cubicles, many of us would never have been exposed to Lady Gaga. That would be terrible … Or would it?
• In a Cubicle Controlled Country many of us would never have had the pleasure of watching American Idol. That would be horrific … Or would it?

The late Paul Harvey just came into my Computer Room and told me I ought to tell you the Rest of the Story about W.C. Fields and the children and the barrel and the feeding and the hole. The Rest of the Story is that W.C. went on to say, “and, when they become teenagers, plug up the hole”.

Don’t blame me. I did not say this terrible thing about our children/teenagers. I only related what W.C. said.

Would W.C. kid u?