Hold Onto Your Wallets!

The Internet wants all our money!

For example, if you want to catch up on recent sports results you can go to ESPN and watch sports clips all day long. There was a time when a commercial would pop up in the beginning of you search and then you could watch clips until you had had your fill. This is not the case any longer. Now you get a commercial before every sports clip. The clips may be was short as 30 seconds but you will have to see a 30 second commercial before you can watch your 30 second clip.

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I just watched a really slick new way to get my money that came to me from the people who use our sadness at the loss of friends and family as an entry into our wallets (here come the bullets).

(I was contacted because I put a comment in a friend’s Book of Memories when he passed away.)

If I sound skeptical, that’s because I am skeptical...

Dear Family and Friends of Peter Fernerk (Yea, Fella is using a fictitious name)...

Ø  Being remembered matters.

Ø  The message you shared in Peter’s Guest Book after his passing was meaningful.

Ø  On the anniversary of Peter’s passing, share another memory or condolence and help others hold Peter a little closer in their hearts as you held him close to yours.

I’m starting to tear up for Peter all over again!

Want to do more to remember Peter than simply Guest Book entry?

Ø On Peter’s anniversary, consider honoring his life and legacy by planting Eco-Friendly Memorial Trees.

Ø Trees will be planted in a forest with the greatest need, at the best suitable time (typically spring or fall), by a team of certified arborists.

Wow! What a great way to honor and remember Peter! He loved trees! When we were kids together I often saw Peter climbing trees.

Your Sympathy Gift includes:

Ø A Digital Certificate, customized with your message, which can be printed for your records or given to the family.

Ø An entry in Peter’s Guest Book, noting your contribution.

Ø A listing in a Memorial Tree Registry, showing that trees were planted in honor of Peter.

Wow! These caring people have thought of everything!

They don’t cost much...(Or do they?)

Ø Buy 10 Memorial Trees and provide oxygen for 40 people annually for only 90.00.

Ø Buy a Cluster of 50 Memorial Trees and provide oxygen for 200 people annually for only $165.00.

Ø Buy a Grove of 100 Memorial Trees and provide oxygen for 400 people annually only $265.00.
>>>Notice how they tug at our wallets by not only remembering Peter but by making us feel guilty if we do not want to also make it possible for other people to breath.

I found myself thinking, even though Peter can no longer breathe, I was certain he would want others to breathe!

Why Plant Trees?

Ø This memorial tree planting will assist in reforestation, improve forest health and area watersheds, and provide a critical habitat for threatened and endangered wildlife.

These compassionate people have thought of everything! This is an offer that is hard to refuse!

The only thing they could have said that they did not say is, “Trees are people too”.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

If The United States Goes To War With China Will They Throw Sponges At Us?

 

The answer to the question posed by the Subject of this Blog Posting is... No, they would not throw sponges at us but Sponges may play an important role in such a conflict.

To be more precise, it is not actual Sponges that would play the important role in the conflict. Instead it would be things that are normally Hard as Rocks but Chinese Made Things that would have the Consistency of Sponges. 

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Yea, I know you are confused again. Please allow me to explain...

In the event of war between the United States and China, those military outposts in the western Pacific (the 7 Islands the Chinese have constructed in the South China Sea) would likely be key initial targets for U.S. strikes.

The Economist reported rumors suggest the new islands’ concrete is crumbling and their foundations are turning to sponge in the hostile climate.

And if that would not be enough of a problem for the Chinese, one wonders what would happen if there were to be a direct hit from a Typhoon?

Here are two links that will make you think of Sponges (or Chinese Construction Materials that remind you of Sponges)...

Ø https://nationalinterest.org/blog/buzz/sunk-how-chinas-man-made-islands-are-falling-apart-and-sinking-ocean-132047

Ø https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&v=W28VRBiLx9s

I don’t want to over-dramatize but do you remember that condo that collapsed in South Florida? If the Chinese built all the building in South Florida, we might have seen a different headline than what we did see...

Headline we saw: “South Florida Building Collapses”.

Headline we might have seen: “South Florida Collapses”.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

 

Women All Over The World Are Dying

 

A Vaccinated Woman has identified as a Vaccinated Man. We are all told that we must all accept His wishes and address Him as a Him (or whatever other pronoun He tells us to use).

A Terrible Glitch has been discovered in the Vaccine the Now Man received 88 Days Ago. The Medical Community announces that the Vaccine that the Now Man received 88 Days Ago becomes fatal to all Women who have been vaccinated with it exactly 90 days after the Vaccine was administered.

The good news is an Antidote to the 90 Days Woman Death Syndrome has been developed and a Worldwide Emergency Inoculation Program has begun.

The question of the day is...

Will the Man who used to be a Women rush to an Emergency Inoculation Place to get the Antidote Tomorrow?

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

This Is the Most Boring Job in the World

 

Costco and COVID19 combined to make Silly happen during the Pandemic...

Ø Every day Costco makes it a practice to give away samples of food products they sell.

Ø Costco employees are assigned to prepare the samples, put them into little plastic cups and place the samples onto a tray for the customers to pick up and eat.

Ø The customers are then supposed to love what they have eaten and buy a large quantity of what they have eaten (Costco only sells large quantities).

Ø Many customers make it a practice of moving from one Tasting Table to the next Tasting Table to the next Tasting Table.

Ø Some of them returned to the same Tasting Table over and over, which I’m sure is a Violation of the Rules in the Costco Customer Grazing Manuel.

Ø I’ve even seen customers doing tricky things like removing their hats and cramming them into their pockets so as not to get caught double or triple sampling by the Costco Table Monitor.

Here’s where the Boring came into play...

Ø During the Pandemic a plastic shield was placed in front of the samples of food and customers were allowed to look at the Tasty Sample Foods but they were not allowed to eat the Tasty Sample Foods.

Ø The Costco Table Monitor was not allowed to go in the Break Room and drink cocktails with little umbrellas in them.

Ø They had to stand behind the Plastic Shielded Sample Foods and do nothing.

Ø They had nothing to do all day but stand there and look at the Plastic Shielded Sample Foods and look at the Customers looking at the Plastic Shielded Sample Foods.

Here’s where the Silly came into play...

Ø As the Pandemic was drawing down to a lower degree of crazy, the Sample Foods were again made touchable by the hungry customers.

Ø The Sample Foods were touchable again but a sign was placed on the table that told the customers, that Due To COVID19, they were not allowed to eat the Sample Food until they were Outside the Costco Store.

Ø I did not see a single customer take some Sample Food who ran out of the store to eat the Sample Food so they could return to the store and move on to the next Sample Food Table to get another Sample Food so they could run out of the store to eat the Sample Food and so on and so forth.

This sign was a Silly Sign. If the Run Out Of The Store Requirement had been a Federal Law, it would have been the most violated Federal Law since Prohibition.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Double Talk About Double Jeopardy

Here is where the confusion starts...

Fifth Amendment:

No person shall be held to answer for a capital, or otherwise infamous crime, unless on a presentment or indictment of a Grand Jury, except in cases arising in the land or naval forces, or in the Militia, when in actual service in time of War or public danger; nor shall any person be subject for the same offence to be twice put in jeopardy of life or limb; nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation.

(Fella did the underlining.)

I recommend an asterisk be placed after the word “limb” followed by this disclaimer, “Just kidding”.

There are many of my Dear Readers who are lawyers but that does not negate my right to my own Stupid (or is it?) Opinion about the Law of Our Land.

There are Strong Opinions out there about Kyle Rittenhouse and what did or did not happen during the Kenosha Rioting of 2020. I have my own Strong Opinion about it all but I am not doing this Blog Posting to discuss that with you. I want to appeal to Common Sense and Fairness and address a You Gotta Be Kidding Aspect of the Law of Our Land.

Put yourself into the middle of all of this and ask yourself to think about how you would feel if you were treated this way by the Law of Our Land (here come the bullet points)...

Ø You have just been through the legal wringer of what we call the Justice System for 15 months.

Ø You have been tried and found Not Guilty On All Counts.

Ø It is hard to describe how relieved you are.

Ø You are making plans about how you are going to go about getting back to a normal life when you see a Brilliant Former Prosecutor on TV explain in excruciating detail how you might again be Put On Trail to again defend yourself against all the Same Charges you have just been found Not Guilty On All Counts.

>>>Have you ever noticed that all TV “Experts” are Former This and Former That? It looks to me like you can’t be hired to the position of TV Expert unless you are Unemployed.

Ø You say to yourself, “Self, that is Double Jeopardy! I’ve seen many a TV Show about Double Jeopardy. I know Double Jeopardy when I see Double Jeopardy and this looks like Double Jeopardy to me!”

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The TV “Expert” said there are two ways in which Rittenhouse could be Re-Tried on the Same Exact Charges that he had just been found Not Guilty On All Counts...

Ø He could be tried in Civil Court. It may be Legally Civil but to us who don’t know what we are talking about it does not look like a Civil Thing to do to someone who has just been found Not Guilty On All Counts.

Ø There is something in the law called the Dual Sovereignty Doctrine. If you want to read all about it, click here and have at it... https://constitution.congress.gov/browse/essay/amdt5-2-1-2-2/ALDE_00000859/ but here is a key excerpt from the link...

“We have here two sovereignties, deriving power from different sources, capable of dealing with the same subject-matter within the same territory. . . . Each government in determining what shall be an offense against its peace and dignity is exercising its own sovereignty, not that of the other.”

The more I read through the above link the more I became confused. I guess that’s why we have lawyers. They step in and take the place of our Mothers who could always stop us dead in our objections by simply saying, “Because I said so”. Our lawyers end our confusion by saying, “Because the law says so!”

In the 3^rd paragraph above I asked you to put yourself in the middle of all of this. Are you still there? When the lawyer told you “Because the law says so” he simply told you How the Cow Ate the Cabbage. Do you feel better?

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: Confused about my use of How the Cow Ate the Cabbage? Let the online Free Dictionary by Farlex explain it to you...

“The unadulterated truth about something; the way something really is. Said especially of a truth that someone does not want to hear or acknowledge.”

After having this Idiom explained to him, surely the Not-Guilty Guy (who is going back into court to do it all over again) must feel a lot better...Or does he?

The Exact Right Words

 

If you are like me, you think of the Exact Right Words after the event where you could have used the Exact Right Words is long gone. David Niven did not have that problem. His words were Exactly Right...

Robert Opel’s Streaking

Robert Opel was a photographer for the LGBT magazine The Advocate and much to everyone’s surprise, it was the 46th Academy Award ceremony (1974) when he made a name for himself by wearing nothing at all and streaking behind actor David Niven while he was hosting.

David Niven smartly remarked:

“Well, ladies and gentlemen, that was almost bound to happen… But isn’t it fascinating to think that probably the only laugh that man will ever get in his life is by stripping off and showing his shortcomings?”

Didya say you wanted to see a Video?

https://youtu.be/2IIl3zSYL8k

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Supply Chain Shortages

I started to make the Subject of this Blog Posting, "Understanding Supply Chain Shortages" but we all know that is Foolishness.

Here are some of the things we can’ get enough of because of Supply Chain Shortages...Oxygen for Medical Use, Workers, Chlorine, Corn, Juice, Juice Boxes (for the Juice we can’t get), Cars, Coffee, Computer Chips, Jet Fuel, Nike Shoes, School Supplies, Taco Bell has reported they are experiencing a National Ingredient Shortage (there’s a broad brush if I have ever seen one) and that old standby Etcetera, Etcetera, Etcetera.

https://youtu.be/1JHH6iwgIek

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Here’s a shortage that only I am reporting on (What would you do without me?)...

For years I have supplied Jingle Bells to fellow tennis players to hang on their clothing so that they can Jingle All The Way while they play tennis from December 1st until the last day we play before Christmas. It is hard to believe but some players refuse the use of my bells because they think I am being Silly.

What? Me Silly?

I just bought 18 new bells from a Dollar Store to replenish my Loaner Bell Supply. (Some of my fellow tennis players must be using the Bells and forgetting to return them to my Loaner Bell Box before they leave the courts or they are throwing them into the bushes when I’m not looking.)

I was horrified to find out that 13 of the 18 new bells I just bought did not have the little clackers inside. Oh my gosh! There is a Clacker Shortage Out There!

Does that new Federal Agency in Washington, D.C, (Bureau of Tabulating Things We Don’t Have Any More) know we are becoming more Clackerless with each passing day?

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This new Agency (which does not do anything about the shortages but just Tabulates the Shortages) is growing rapidly or at least it was growing rapidly. The Agency is now experiencing its own Labor Shortage. In 2 months of existence it had grown to more than 10,000 Tabulators. Now their growth spiral had slowed dramatically as more and more Qualified Tabulators have discovered they can make more on Welfare than they can make Tabulating at the Agency’s Palatial New Tabulation Headquarters in D.C. One of their early hires was quoted in the New York Times saying, “I can do nothing in the comfort of my own living room. Why should I travel all the way into the heart of Washington, D.C. to do nothing there?”

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From Fella’s Figure This One Out Department...

This from Cracker Barrel’s Web Site... "We apologize for the inconvenience as we are temporarily out of Hashbrown Casserole due to supply chain shortages. Please note that Hashbrown Casserole is not available as a side item option when placing your online order. We appreciate your patience as we work to make it available as soon as possible".

We will never figure this one out! Hashbrowns are too complicated. What ingredient is in short supply? Is it Unsalted Butter? or is it Frozen Shredded Hash Brown Potatoes? or is it Sharp Yellow Cheddar Cheese? or is it Sour Cream? or is it Garnish? or is it Yellow Onions or is it Eggs? or is it Sweet Paprika? or is it Cayenne? or is it Chopped Fresh Chives? or is it Kosher Salt? or is it Freshly Ground Black Pepper?

This is awful! Someone has to get their Bureaucratic Arms around this Quandary!

I know what we need do! We need a New Federal Agency! ... Or do we?

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Stand Down Burn Down

About every 6 weeks Celebrities R Us has an Awards Gala out in Hollywood where Celebrities present Awards to Themselves, Trees, Climate Activists, Unicorns, Rocks and Al Gore.

At their next Awards Gala they will present multiple awards to all the Mayors across the Good Ole USofA who instituted Police Stand Downs So We Could All Watch Buildings Burn Down.

The President of Celebrities R Us read this Press Release to the assembled breathless media yesterday...

Starting last year the many Mostly Peaceful Fiery Protests have brought a new dimension of excitement onto the American Landscape. The Mayors who instituted these Police Stand Downs recognized that we all had become bored with Seinfeld Reruns and gave us something new and different to watch on the nightly news each night. Even though the frequency of these Mostly Peaceful Fiery Protests has diminished as of late we will always have Portland’s Ongoing Mostly Peaceful Fiery Protests to satisfy our yearning for excitement. We are secure in the knowledge that we will always be able to watch Portland destroy itself in the safety of our living rooms each night. What a joy it is to see all this destruction happening night after night while realizing that it’s not our businesses that are being destroyed.

After the Press Release had been read, one of the reporters asked, “Your honor, do you not think that some consideration should be given to the Mom and Pop Business Owners who lost everything in these Mostly Peaceful Fiery Protests?”

His Honor looked confused. Knowing he was talking to a Mental Midget he composed himself and put the Midget in his place with this brilliant answer, “Who are these Mom and Pop People? Have they every made a movie? Have any of them ever received an award from any of the plethora of Awards Galas we have held all these years? Have any of them ever been to the South of France in season? The truth is we do not know who they are. Oh yes, some of them may have raised families but there are lots of families out here and some of these people they raised have done some really bad things.

Let’s move on. You there in the front row wearing all those diamonds and showing all those really interesting tattoos, do you have a better question to ask of me?”

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

 

So, What’s New? Portland Is Rioting! That’s Not New.

There is something new but please don’t jump to the bottom of this Blog Posting to find out what it is. Wade through my words to get to there. You will enjoy the wade...Or will u?

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Following the Kyle Rittenhouse Not-Guilty Verdict there were scattered protests across the Fruited Plain and a riot was declared in Portland, Oregon.

Maybe you think I am Picking on Portland. Maybe you think I am making this up because I like to Pick on Portland. Well, Mr. Smarty Pants Wrong Thinker, here is a link to a 44 second USA Today Video Article that shows I am speaking the truth...again.

https://www.usatoday.com/videos/news/nation/2021/11/20/rittenhouse-protest-portland-declared-riot/8700427002/

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In 1945 four years after I was born a movie entitled A Tree Grows in Brooklyn was a sensation. Today A Riot Was Declared in Portland is not a movie and we don’t see much about Portland’s riots on the Nightly News because the Talking Heads don’t want to look like they are Picking on Portland.

Here is a link to a Washington Examiner News Article that tells us all about these Ongoing Riots...  

(If you don’t want to click on the link, just read the last paragraph excerpt below the link below and you will get a good feel about what’s going on over there.)

https://www.washingtonexaminer.com/opinion/portland-legalized-rioting-and-youll-never-guess-what-happened-next

The last paragraph says it all, “Portland has chosen to be the home of rioters for years now. The city will also likely set its new modern high for homicides, as it is well on pace to pass its 1987 record. Portland leaders and Oregon legislators have stood idly by as lawlessness has been encouraged by activists and agitators. The outcome has been predictable, and the same mindset can’t be allowed to consume other cities or states throughout the country.”

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Portland’s Mayor Wheeler

I know what the Good Citizens of Portland can do! They can use the ballot box to not re-elect Mayor Wheeler! Here is why this strategy does not work in Portland...

Ø George Floyd was killed on May 25, 2020.

Ø Nationwide protests and rioting started on May 25, 2020.

Ø Portland was especially hit with riots happening almost every night since May 25, 2020.

Ø Mayor Wheeler instructed the Portland Police to Stand Down.

Ø It was called a Strategy.

Ø The Anarchists saw the police standing around and took that as Portland’s “permission” to continue to Riot.

Ø The Anarchists continued to Riot.

Ø Portland’s City Elections were held on November 3, 2020.

Ø November 3, 2020 is more than 5 months after the rioting in Portland started.

Ø The police have been standing and watching what was happening all this time because Mayor Wheeler told them to do “enforce” his Stand and Watch Strategy.

Mayor Ted Wheeler Was Relected On November 3, 2020!

Wheeler had support from United for Portland, a group that formed in October and included the Services Employees International Union, the Portland Business Alliance, the Oregon Restaurant & Lodging Association, the Oregon League of Conservation Voters, and the Portland NAACP.

Hiz Honor got 46.0% of the vote.

The second place candidate got 40.8% of the Vote.

Charlie Brown is visiting with me today. Charlie just said, “Aaugh!”

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Is it possible I still have not convinced you that there is A Lot of Rioting in Portland? WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU? Did I just hear you say it is an exaggeration to say Portland Rioted Almost Every Night? Ok, Mr. Hard to Convince, here is what happened during the 72 nights following May 29, 2020...

Protesters threw projectiles during 58 of the 72 nights of demonstrations.

They started fires on 42 of the nights.

Riots were declared on 17 of the nights, though it isn’t reported how often police classified the Chaos not as Riots but as “Unlawful Assemblies”.

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(This is the Something New I promised at the beginning of this Blog Posting)

Mayor Wheeler has accepted responsibility.

Now I see what you are thinking (my powers have moved on from knowing what you are saying to knowing what you are thinking). You are thinking you want proof that the Mayor has stepped up and taken responsibility. Well, here it is...

September 9, 2021

Portland Mayor Admits Hands-Off Approach to Riots Was Wrong

https://bearingarms.com/tomknighton/2021/09/09/portland-mayor-riots-n49773

I know some of you will not read this Mea Culpa Article about Hiz Honor saying it was hiz fault so I will leave you with these 4 bullet point excerpts from the article the some of you did not read...

Ø Even after the rest of the nation started to settle down, Portland had riots continue nightly for months.

Ø This was especially problematic because the Portland Police Department didn’t really do anything because the city mandated a hands-off approach to the rioters.

Ø Now, the mayor believes that might have been a mistake.

Ø Let’s file this under, “No s***, Sherlock.” (Fella did the highlighting.)

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: Now I know what you are about to be thinking in a moment. You are going to think, “How dare Fella add a Lagniappe to this already too long Blog Posting!”

The Headline to that last link above was (that might have been a mistake) ...

Portland mayor now says police ‘hands off’ riot response was ‘not the right strategy’

Fella comment to Hiz Honor the Mayor... Doing nothing in the face of massive and ongoing destruction of lives and property in your city Is Not A Strategy!

Your Honor, I Object! This Was An Accident!

NBC labels Waukesha attack an ‘accident’

by Becket Adams, Senior Commentary Writer | 

November 24, 2021 03:53 PM

A man rammed his car this weekend into a Christmas parade in Waukesha, Wisconsin, killing six (so far) and injuring dozens more. Eyewitnesses claim the driver intentionally sped up and swerved his vehicle into revelers.

But let’s not call it an “attack,” suggests NBC News. Rather, let’s call it an “accident.”

In a video uploaded Tuesday describing the arrest of suspect Darrell E. Brooks Jr., who is black, NBC included a caption that read , “Video captured by a Ring camera appears to show [Brooks] in front of a home before being arrested in connection to the Waukesha parade accident.”

Fella did the underlining.

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Other things must happen...

Ø The Victims should to be referred to Alleged Victims.

Ø The Injured’s Injuries should be referred to as Suspected Injuries.

Ø Ford Motor Company needs to be sued for making a Dangerous Weapon.

All 3 bullet points above make perfect sense in the Foolish world we live in today...Or do they?

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

 

Mystery Solved!

I have found him! I have found the Missing Man! How could I not have noticed him before now? Are my Renowned Noticing Skills slipping away from me?

Have I got your curiosity aroused? I hope I have but allow me to toy with you a bit more.

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The Missing Man has gone missing from Television Commercials for years and shows no sign of making a return anytime in the near future.

You have seen all the commercials just as I have seen all the commercials but you are not me and you may not have noticed what I noticed. Here is the layout of the kind of TV Commercials that have been catching my Noticing Eye for years now...

Ø A Mother with 2 Beautiful Mystery Children living in a Beautiful House is sitting down with her 2 Beautiful Mystery Children to decide what Security System they will select for the Beautiful House they live in.

Ø A Lady wakes up the morning after she retires from her life-long job. She strolls around with her cup of coffee in her Beautiful Home. And she starts planning in her Beautiful Head about what she is going to do with the rest of her life. Her Beautiful Mystery Children come join her and start helping her plan her Beautiful Future.

Ø A Mother is in the family car with a Beautiful Mystery Child teaching her Beautiful Mystery Child to drive the family car.

My Dear Readers, I know you. I know what you are thinking...

You are wondering why I kept calling the Beautiful Children “Mystery Children” in my three bullet points above. Pardon me. I thought it was obvious.

It’s because the Beautiful Children are in these Commercials but there is no Beautiful Father. There is not even an Ugly Father. There is No Father at all. If there is No Father, where did the Beautiful Children come from?

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I am about to solve the Mystery of the Mystery Children and the Mystery Missing Father...

I was in Costco a couple of days ago when I found the Missing Mystery Father. He walked right past me as I was looking for the beer. I found him and I found he had already found the beer. He was pushing a cart that had 4 Cases of Beer that had 36 Beers in Each Case!

There Is No Father In These Commercials Because He Is In Costco Buying The Beer!

How Silly you are! You probably thought all of this Foolishness above was my attempt to describe the Ongoing Attempt by some Mystery People to Diminish the Importance of the Father and/or the Father Figure in the Good Ole USofA.

Never forget that I know what you are thinking.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Can I Be Serious For A Minute? If PETA Wants To Be Taken Seriously, They Ought To Address Serious Issues.

 

I’m sorry (not really) but I think People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals should not spend their time getting agitated about Silly Issues if they want to be thought of as Not Silly.

PETA now is demanding that the Commissioner of Baseball change the name of Bullpen to the Arm Barn. I (an acknowledged expert on Silliness) am here to tell you that this is Silliness of the Highest Order.

The first recorded use of the term Bullpen was in 1877...

Ø These people way back then were not Evil People just because they started calling the Bullpen the Bullpen.

Ø They were not deliberately being disrespectful of Bulls.

Ø They were not the least bit uncaring about the feelings of Pens.

Lucky for them they happened to be living in a time when they were allowed to say things without being always on guard that each and every word they used would be analyzed for inner meaning knowing that a wrong word at the wrong time could jeopardize their livelihoods.

What’s next?...

Ø The word “Strike” needs to be banned from baseball because it implies violence. It would be better if we called it a “Centered Placement of the Ball”.

Ø The use of the word “Gridiron” must be removed from Football because a Gridiron is a Hot Grate for Cooking Food. Research has been conducted by some really smart researchers and they determined that the smoke emitted from the millions of Gridirons worldwide is confusing the Caribou and causing them to migrate into areas they don’t want to migrate into and once they do migrate where they did not want to migrate to they do not know how to get back from whence they migrated.

Ø The word “Sneakers” ought to be banned from basketball because it has a nasty ring to it since it implies that the basketball players hang around with Sneaky People like Burglars. What’s the alternative? There are many possibilities but “Soft Shoes” has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?

Don’t blame me for this Blog Posting. The Silly People at PETA caused me to write it. I just stumble across the Irrational out there and try to warn you what Foolishness is coming your way so you won’t be blindsided.

See, I myself just did it without knowing I did it! I was uncaring and insensitive and I want to apologize before a boycott is launched against my Blog. I said “blindsided” and I am sorry I did. I know I should have said Visually Impairedsided or Unseeingsided or Destitute of Visionsighted.

One thing I know for sure is I will never say “Blind As A Bat” because that is sure to get the Bat Lovers R Us People all roiled up at me.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: The sad part about all of this is, in the Era of Silliness which we live in, we hear such Foolishness and we laugh and we make jokes about how Crazy the Silly Protests are. Then, within weeks of the laughter dying down, we turn on the TV to see Panel Discussions in progress about the merits of what we were just laughing about. If we stay in front of the TV we witness College Professors explaining the Merits of the Crazy. We sit with our collective mouths open as we hear Psychologist lament about the injustices that are been heaped on bulls from the moment they are born. Before we know it we begin to feel guilty. Then we shock even ourselves by saying something like, “It looks like the manager has had enough. He just told a left hander to start warming up in the Arm Barn”.

This Election Was Flawed!

 

Did you just go jumping to a false conclusion again? Did you think I was talking about the 2020 Presidential Election? Ah Ha! I tricked you.

Fella is not talking about that election. He is talking about the Minneapolis City Election on November 2 where the good citizens of that fair city voted on a Referendum to Defund the Police.

Here is a quote from CNN Politics Online... “Talk of curbing police departments by cutting or limiting their resources has run into a countervailing wall of concern over public safety and waning support from early allies -- including leading Democrats who largely view it as political poison.”

Here is another quote from CNN Politics Online... “Mayor Jacob Frey was confronted outside his home in June 2020, shortly after Floyd's murder, and jeered when he refused to commit to abolishing the police department -- a much more ambitious step than was proposed in the ballot initiative on Tuesday. A day after Frey's confrontation with protesters, nine members of the city council announced plans to begin the process of ending the Minneapolis Police Department.”

(Somehow there is a difference between Defunding, Abolishing and Ending...Or is there?)

Here is a quote from Fella... “Wow! Nine members of the city council! The city Council only has 12 members. That 75% of the members were in favor of this Silly Idea! Wow!”

Fella is still bug eyed... “Wow! The President of the City Council was one of the nine! Wow!”

Here is another quote from CNN Politics Online... “More people cast their ballots early this year than any other Minneapolis election in 45 years. Early voting was up 143% compared to the 2017 municipal election, and up 488% compared to the 2013 municipal election.”

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In the end, it was up to Minneapolis residents to decide what they wanted—and on Election Day they voted 56 percent to 44 percent against the Referendum’s “Public Safety Amendment”, approved a strong mayor system, ousted some of the most vocal progressives in the council chambers and reelected Mayor Jacob Frey, a moderate who fought hard against the amendment.

By early fall, many of the council members had a change of heart and none of them wanted to discuss Defunding the Police.

The northern side of the city, which houses the largest African American population in the state, voted against the proposal.

That many Black residents in Minneapolis voted against the amendment wasn’t unexpected. Weeks before Election Day, pollsters had found that 75% of Black people here wanted more boots on the ground.

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But what prompted Fella to name this Blog Posting, “This Election Was Flawed!”? When I (me) put this question to Fella (me) Fella (me) said in Bullet Point Format (he {I} always talks in Bullet Point Format)...

• What concerns me is that fact that 44% Voted For the Referendum!
• 44% ain’t that far from 51%.
• It does not take much to move voters 7 Percentage Points in the Good Ole USofA today!
• Big happenings can cause riots and so can small happenings.
• The reason Fella (me) called this a Flawed Election is the fact that a significant percentage of the 44% that voted for the Referendum were people who could benefit if the Police Department were to be weakened because it had been Defunded, Abolished or Ended.
• Minneapolis’ Criminals R Us Chapter actually came out in full support of the Defund the Police Referendum!
• Criminals R Us even ran a heavy campaign of Full Page Newspaper Ads in favor of the Referendum!
• Fella (me) strongly believes that Criminals should be recused from being able to vote in a Defund the Police Referendum because they have a Vested Interest in seeing the Police Department Defunded!

This just ain’t right! (Fella {me} just ran out of Bullet Points).  

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

 

I understand That There Are Some of You Who Are Tired Of Foolishness, Silliness & Craziness. Well This Your Big Day!

I warn you Serious Seekers out there that, after you read this, you may be sorry but in your sadness your should remember that...

“Those who forget history are condemned to repeat it” is attributed to the American philosopher George Santayana and it can be accurately quoted as “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it” as stated in his work, The Life of Reason : Reason in Common.”

I have a very big book entitled, Chronicle of the 20^th century. On page 475 of 1,374 there is this small article (they are all small articles) that contains a Big Warning to us smug moderns who say to ourselves, “We would never do something like that. That’s crazy. We are smarter than that.”

Unless you have been living under a rock and watching nothing but the comings and goings of celebrities and, of course, football you should know that History Is Slowly Trying To Repeat Itself.

Here is the article. Don’t skim it. Read it slowly. Let it sink in...

Nazis Take Parents Away From Children

November 29, 1937. In Waldenberg, Germany, a court has taken parents away from their children because they refused to teach them Nazi ideology. The parents are pacifists, members of a Christian sect called International Bible Researchers. The court accused them of creating an environment where the children would grow up “enemies of the state”. The children were delivered into the state’s care.

The judge delivered a lengthy statement reading in part., “The law as a racial and national instrument entrusts German parents with the education of their children only under certain conditions, namely, that they educate them in the fashion that the nation and state expect”.

Worriedfella