The United Kingdom Takes The Bull By The Horns

Government Needs To Learn To Distinguish Fly Chit From Pepper

Since Britain voted to leave the European Union more than a year ago, Continental Europeans have mockingly said that the decision will result in Britain becoming an isolated and lonely island nation.

 

Britain, in fact, already has a serious problem with loneliness. Research has found more than 9,000,000 people in Britain often or always feel lonely.

Back On January 17th Prime Minister Theresa May Appointed a Minister for Loneliness

Britain’s Office for National Statistics will help to establish a method of measuring loneliness and a fund was set up to help the government and charities develop a wider strategy to identify opportunities to tackle the problem.

 

A retired nurse from Berkshire, in southwest England, said she started to feel lonely when her son moved abroad and she downsized to a smaller house in a different county. She said, “It was a financial decision to move and I didn’t really have it in me to start making new friends.”

 

Just how would the Minister for Loneliness address this lady’s issues?...

Ø The government could possibly pay to move the son back to where Mum lives.

Ø If he refused to move back, the Minister for Loneliness would certainly have to put him in jail until he agrees to return.

Ø Because of the concerns Mum had about finances, the government ought to pay to get her a bigger house.

Ø The government certainly should consider paying to move her back to her old county.

Ø The Minister for Loneliness would have to coordinate the moving of the son back to where his lonely Mum is living but the Ministry would have to make sure it waited until it was finally decided whether Mum was going to move back to her old county or just get her new government paid for bigger house in her new county before the government moved the son to where she is living because lack of coordination could result in him being moved to her new county after she had moved to her old county. (I just knew this was going to get complicated.)

Ø Because of the potential for confusion described in the above bullet, Theresa May will certainly have to appoint a Minister for Loneliness Rectification Coordination to handle these kinds of issues for the Ministry.

Ø Since she does not have it in her to make new friends, the Minister for Loneliness is preparing Regulatory Requirements for issuing Compulsory Loneliness Elimination Compliance Notifications (CLECN’s) to send to all Mum’s neighbors within a 3 block radius of her new home, wherever that new home ends up being located, requiring that they become friends with Mum.

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The Fella’s Question of the Day...

Do Governments have to get involved in every aspect of their minion’s lives?

 

The Government’s Answer of the Day...

You betcha government does! If Government does not get involved in every aspect of their minion’s lives, who will?

 

From the Fella’s What’s Next? Department...

Ø Minister for Talking Too Much?

Ø Minister for Yawning at Inappropriate Times?

Ø Minister for Burping?

 

I shudder to think about it.

 

Would I kid u?

Smartfella