I just got back from The Beach. During October it is a nice place to go to get away from people because it is not the busy season, schools are in session, it is not cold yet & the beaches are darn near empty...Or are they?
That’s the way it used to be anyway. This year was different. This time there were families everywhere. They were all over my beach. They all had rented bicycles & were rolling all over everywhere that was not a beach. All of them were carrying cell phones & way too many of them had tattoos.
Every time I asked anyone why there were so many people I was told the same thing... “It’s Fall Break”. When I would reply, “Fall Break, I never heard of such a thing”, I was looked at like I was stupid. For a smart fella, I sure get looked at like I am stupid a lot.
It was at this point that I was glad I had room in my car to pack my Potted Plant Outfit. I put it on & started to mingle with the multitude. They did not pay any attention to this potted plant bouncing up to them because they were too busy paying attention to their cell phones.
I started asking the teenagers questions & the far greater majority of them gave these answers...
- When was the Vietnam War fought?... Answer: That’s a tough one but I am fairly certain it was during the 1800’s.
- How many stars are there on that American Flag waving on that pole over there?... Is that what that is? I really can’t answer this question because it is waving too fast & I can’t count them. (Credit for this silliness goes to Jay Leno’s Jaywalking bit.)
- Who was John Wayne?... I don’t have a clue. Oh, wait a second! Is that that really cute guy on Dancing with the Starts?
Let’s get back to Fall Break. While I was Plant Eavesdropping I heard one teen say, “I sure needed this break! I’ve been in school since mid August. This is the first week of October. That’s a long time! I can’t wait till Thanksgiving Break. Then it’s going to be tough sledding to get to Christmas Break (actually she said Holiday Break). And I can’t wait till Spring Break (she did not say Easter Break). This year I am going to Bambini. The only problem is Spring Break is only 7 days long. My parents have agreed that it is too short & have told me to take a couple of extra days. Don’t you think there ought to be a Break between Holiday Break & Spring Break? I sure do!”
I usually come back from The Beach refreshed & energized. This time I came back feeling like a balloon that had just been pinned.
Would I kid u?
Smartfella
3 comments:
Someone else wonders about the Fall Break innovation! I learned about it from my next-door neighbor who is in 2nd grade. He was quite excited about it but I asked him—didn’t you just start school a little while ago? He looked at me all puzzled, babbled something unintelligible, and ran home. I guess all the polls showing the USA near the bottom in education especially in math and science must have been misinterpreted or we would not be organizing the school year around Breaks. Time-on-task is onerous, of course, and probably not psychologically healthy.
Overlooking the heads the Breakers, I hope your beach-time was splendid and that you have some lovely photos. Last year’s shot of the two of you in beach chairs facing the sunset is memorable. Please ask your wife to send me a couple of good pix and to forgive the deadly email I sent her—it was not brief. Not even a suitable beach read. I hope she was able to relax and spent time on the To-Do-For-Christmas list furtively while you were away on Potted Plant Interviews.
I would not be surprised if this story was not made up! The world we live in is unbelievable nowadays.
Hey smart fella, I heard somewhere from some guy that saw it on the Internet that fall break started when, a few years ago, there were teacher furloughs. Now, I haven't checked this on Snopes or anything, but they say that paid fall break is now an institution in 27 States.
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