Rewriting History … Again

I see where the Governor of New Mexico is hankering (that’s old west talk for yearning to) pardon Billy The Kid. The Smartfella? always finds himself hankering to understand why his fellow man gets himself all tangled up about such things. Such happenings always bring up questions in my puzzled mind…

• Why bother taking the time to hanker to to do it?
• Should not the governor be devoting his time to more pressing issues?

If little Billy is actually pardoned, it seems just as logical to consider other equally silly actions that ought to follow right behind…

• Should we not forgive Ivan the Terrible for being terrible?
• Once little Billy is pardoned should we not then declare that the 21 people he killed did not become dead?
• Should not the descendants who were not born of the 21 people who were not killed then be given compensation for the life that they did not lead?

As an aside…

In doing my extensive research for this Foolishness, I spend 20 minutes reading a site on the Internet about Billy the Kid called Fact vs. Myth. This was, at the same time, very enlightening and confusing. I found out that everything we know about little Billy is not true, starting with He Was Not Little…

• He did not kill 21 people.
• He was not ugly.
• He lived to a ripe old age (probably on a Brussels Sprouts Farm with Butch Cassidy & Elvis).
• He did not have a bad temper.
• He had a good sense of humor.
• He was not a big time cattle rustler.
• He did not join Jesse James’ Gang.
• He did not kill his first man because that man insulted his mother.
• He was not chubby.
• He was not left-handed but was ambidextrous and primarily right-handed.
• He was not illiterate.
• He did not shoot a man in a hotel for snoring too loud. 
• He did not drink too much.

Heck, this guy was a saint! The least the Governor could do would be to change his name to Billy the Adult.

Would I kid u?