I Was Once A Popular Word

Whatever happened to the word “million(s)”?

Here is a recent interview conducted by www.what’sgoingonincongresstoday.com ...

What’s Going On In Congress Today Guy: Thank you for taking time out of your busy schedule to come in for this interview today.

Used To Be A Popular Word Guy: It is my pleasure but, actually, I did not have much to do anyway.

WGOICT Guy: Well, you certainly have jumped right into the heart of the reason for this interview. Can you tell us what happened to make you so little used, or dare I say, downright unpopular?

UTBAPW Guy: At first it was a slow process. Every time the citizens of the United States turned around our elected representatives in Congress were using my name. They would say, “A million dollars for this or 200 million dollars for that and then the word(s) “million(s)” disappeared from their vocabulary. They started saying, “A billion dollars for this or 200 billion dollars for that” and they completely forgot they had ever heard of the word(s) “million(s)”.

WGOICT Guy: Was it a gradual process?

UTBAPW Guy: At first it was but almost overnight the process has accelerated in recent years. Now it is as if they never knew of my existence.

WGOICT Guy: Don’t you see any hope that you will make a comeback or are you on a slippery slope to oblivion?

UTBAPW Guy: There was a time that I thought there was hope for my continued usage but now I think the latter fate that you just mentioned in your question is my sad future.

WGOICT Guy: What was it that gave you hope?

UTBAPW Guy: Members of Congress used to say things like, “One billion 500 million” but now they just say, “One and a half billion” or “One point five billion”. There is no longer any reference to the word(s) “million(s)” in their pontifications.

WGOICT Guy: I must admit that this is a sadder story than I anticipated when I originally set up this interview. What are you going to do now?

UTBAPW Guy: Sorry to ruin your day but I have to tell it like it is. What am I going to do? I see my path as clear as the look of compassion on your face. I am going to slide into the Ash Heap of History and see if I can find General MacArthur. He is still fading away down there somewhere. He might remember me. He might understand what has happened to me ... or will he?

Would I kid u?