Saturday, November 15, 2025

I Don’t Like You but I Really Hate My Management for Trying to Make You Think I Like You.

Here is a Blog Posting of mine from April 9, 2010…

Making Clerks Friendlier

This is from The Philadelphia Inquirer … The state's Liquor Control Board is spending more than $173,000 to try to make workers friendlier and more well-mannered at the nearly 650 stores it operates. The board says it wants to make sure clerks are saying "hello," "thank you" and "come again" to customers shopping for wine and spirits.

A Harrisburg good-government activist said it's, “a sad state of affairs when you have to train people to be kind and courteous”.

This is what Fella thinks about this sad state of affairs…

If we don’t act now, we will find ourselves having to spend even more money to train clerks to…

  • Give the customers back their change.
  • Give the customers the bags (paper or plastic) containing what they have bought.
  • On cold days keeping the doors to the stores unlocked during their work shift because clerks had started locking the doors to prevent cold air from rushing in and giving them a chill.*

Would I kid u?

************

If Target’s management had read my blog from 2010 they might have thought better before issuing their 2025 Be Nice to Our Customers Directive.

Here is what Target’s Management thought was a No-Brainer Directive that no one, including their current employees, would object to…

  • A new staff policy at Target, part of a program called 10-4, is forcing employees to engage with customers more.
  • Fella says notice it said “forcing” and it appears force is going to be necessary.
  • Staff within a four-foot radius of a shopper must also personally greet the customer and initiate a warm, helpful interaction.
  • Fella thinks they will start making sure they stay 5 feet away from customers.
  • The company said that the new program is an attempt to elevate the shopping experience for patrons, making them feel truly appreciated.
  • With the resentment shown below, Fella wonders if they are really appreciated.
  • Target said, “We know when our guests are greeted, feel welcomed and get the help they need that translates to guest love and loyalty”.
  • Fella thinks it may translate into guest love and loyalty, but at this point it is generating employee hate and resistance.

After the comments that came back from Current Target Employees (see below), Current Management has headed back to the drawing board.

Employees sounding off online about the new policy makes Fella think the 10-4 Plan is likely to backfire…

  • “Who the f–k is waving at guests?”
  • “If I was [sic] a shopper, I would find that creepy.”
  • “Who the heck waves? I’ve never waved at a guest and would feel so uncomfortable doing so.”
  • One worker mocked the policy, saying the person who came up with it is “obviously an alien” and should be “investigated” by U.S. authorities.
  • “There is no way they’ve lived on this planet for years and think waving is a completely natural thing to do with guests!”
  • “Nothing says ‘corporate joy’ like a mandatory smile.”

************

Back at the beginning of this Blog Posting, we were told of the good intentions of Pennsylvania’s state's Liquor Control Board when it thought it was a good idea to spend more than $173,000 to try to make workers friendlier and more well-mannered.

Fella’s advice to Current Target Managements is… Have you ever heard of A Drop in The Bucket? $173,000 is not near enough to get your Modern Target Employees to be nice. If you said the word “nice” to any of them, they would whip out their Smartphone and Google the word.

On the other hand, don’t get carried away with how much you do spend. No amount of money is likely to fix this problem. Go back above and read the last six bullets. Do you really think these employees sound fixable?

I have another idea. Call the Pennsylvania State Liquor Control Board and ask how their $173,000 investment worked out. If they come back with an evasive answer like, “Our sales did not go down”, remember they were selling booze and you are selling Nespresso Pods, Underwear and Mints.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: Fella wondered if those fellows running Pennsylvania’s state's Liquor Control Board were that bright to begin with when he learned they spent another $173,000 trying to figure out why winter sales results were so much lower than summer sales results even after they found out that their employees had started locking the doors in winter.

Friday, November 07, 2025

I Know How to Prevent a Government Shutdown from Starting, And If One Somehow Got Started by Accident, I Know How to Get It Shut Down So Quickly History Will Never Know It Got Started Accidently

 

It’s a 3 Step Process but the 1st Step and the 2nd Step are the only ones that count, so forget I said anything about Step 3.

Step 1: Congress Will Not Get Paid for as long as the Shutdown Lasts.

Step 2: Congress Will Not Get Reimbursed for the time that the Shutdown was Shut Down after the Shutdown is over.

Do you see why Step 3 was thrown into the ashbin of history?

Would I kid u?

Smartfella


Monday, November 03, 2025

Are You Wise? If You Are, Heed My Words. What Are My Words? Don’t Dare Go Driving Around Up There!

From the get-go of this Blog Posting I will admit, last month I was not wise because I was Silly. I actually drove around in the Northeast of the Good Ole USofA.

That begs this question, how do those that drive to and from work in the Northeast make it back home alive day after day? 

Said another way...

  • I wonder how many times a year does a Northeastern Driver call into work and say, “I’m terribly sorry but I can’t come in today. I’m afraid to go out there”. 
  • The office says, “What do you mean ‘out there’? What are you afraid of?” 
  • The scaredy cat says, “Them!” 
  • The office says, “Oh, I understand”.

Potholes…

I now believe that every pothole in the Good Ole USofA is in the Northeast. There is a lot of money to be made by a Smartfella who opens a series of Repair Shops named, Alignments "Я" Us

On the other hand, it may be that they are not bothered by potholes. They drive so fast that their tires do not sink into potholes. They just zip over them.

They All Hated Me...

It was quickly obvious to me why every other driver around me was mad at me. It was because I was only going 15 miles per hour over the posted speed limit. If you only drive 15 miles per hour over the posted speed limit, every other driver will blow his horn as he speeds past you, and he will glare at you as he goes by.

State Governments Actually Employ Horn Blowers to Blow Their Horns…

Allow me to explain... 

  • These Horn Blowers are everywhere.
  • I probably can’t prove they are everywhere but in my personal experience I can testify that there was always one of them behind me.
  • The Departments of Transportation equip the Horn Blower’s cars with electronic devices mounted on their dashboards that constantly scan for drivers who dare to think while they drive.

Allow me to explain... 

  • If you are a driver who comes up against a toll booth and for a slit second you get confused and don't know what to do, one of these horn blowing drivers is certain to be behind you and he is certain to angrily blow his angry horn at you because you dared to pause and think what you should do next. 
  • The Rule of the Road up here is...When in Doubt, Smash the Accelerator!

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: The mugging is so bad up there that the muggers are offering the mugged half of what they lost in the mugg, if the mugged will walk the mugger safely back home.