I’ve Got The Exact Right Words Inside My Computer & I’m Going To Let Them Out

In the Great State of Georgia we have a problem with Lobbyists. The problem with Lobbyists is that the Lobbyists have no problem in their unending efforts to get the State of Georgia Legislators to do their bidding...

• In The Peach State there is a concern that Lobbyists are “Influencing” our Legislators.
• “Influencing” was once called “bribing”.
• The crux of the problem just might be centered around the fact that there is no limit on how much our Lobbyists can spend on our Legislators.

I know I call myself The Smartfella but I am smart enough to know that some might take issue with how smart I really am. However, I am smart enough to know that unlimited spending on Legislators will very likely lead to our Honorable Legislators becoming not so Honorable.
I am comforted to see that the Republican House Speaker has sprung into action. He is taking the bull by the horns. He is going to nip this one in the bud. He is going to stop the buck.
The Speaker plans to create a Study Group when the General Assembly reconvenes in January of 2013 to examine how other states handle Banning Gifts by Lobbyists.
Here comes the sarcasm...

• We are told there is a need for a Study Group.
• We are told there is a need to examine how other states handle this thorny issue.
• I wonder if this will entail trips to other states.
• I wonder if one of these other states will be Hawaii.

I have a plan of action that would save all this studying and traveling...

• Buy a Laptop Computer.
• Place the new Laptop Computer on the Speaker’s Desk in front of the Speaker.
• Instruct the Speaker to peck out the following words for a new law that he will propose in the legislature...

“It is against the law in the State of Georgia for any Legislator to take anything from any Lobbyist.”

That oughta do it. This issue does not seem to be that thorny an issue to a Smartfella.

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There are several reasons why my Piece-Of-Cake Simple Common Sense Legislative Wording (above) will never become law in Georgia.
Here is what is going to happen to my nineteen words of Piece-Of-Cake Simple Common Sense Legislative Wording...

• An objection will be raised with regard to the number of words in the bill because it is 57,783 words shorter than the Required Minimum Wording for any proposed legislation.
• There will be much consternation about the fact that the wording of the bill is able to be completely understood. A long-time member of the state Senate is sure to say, “If we allow this bill to be passed into law, we will set a dangerous precedent. The voters could very well come to expect all bills we pass in the future to be clear and understandable.”
• This will be heard coming from a distressed house member, “Mr. Speaker, I ask you where in this bill’s wording are the words we have come to know and love?...
  *The first of many examples of how Wording Challenged this bill is is I see no use of the word “whereas”. “Whereas” is one of my personal favorites.
  *We have all come to know and love “aforementioned”. There is not a single “aforementioned” in here.
  *Where is the much beloved use of the word “reasonable”? It makes a tear come to my eye when I think of the many hours we have spent in this hallowed chamber arguing about how much is reasonably “reasonable”... Reasonable Expenditure, Reasonable Expense Reimbursement, Reasonable Payments, etc. These are the types of legislative debates that have made the folks back home look upon this Legislative Body in awe. To be perfectly honest with you, Mr. Speaker, without the numerous arguments we have entered into over the meaning of “reasonable” we would probably have signed into Happy Hour many days at 2:30pm. Golly gee, we could all be alcoholics by now!”

If they were all drunkards, we Folks Back Home, just might have lost all respect for them... Or would we?... Or have we?”
Would I kid u?