Construction of a Shower Stall with a View Toward Preventing Litigation

The health club where I am desperately trying to prevent my heart from attacking me has a brand new shower stall. Because I have a tendency to allow my mind to wander, I find this seemingly mundane plastic cleaning compartment quite interesting.

Here is what my wandering mind has been taking note of…

• The floor of the stall is constructed with a very gentle slope toward the center drain hole. This has been done to ward off law suits due to a person’s slippery foot slipping on the slippery floor if the slope were too sloping and thereby causing the showering person to slip and fall. If this were to happen, there would almost certainly be a lawsuit because the showering person slipped in lawsuit happy America.
• The floor of the stall is constructed without any kind of lip or ledge on the floor where the dirty person steps in to become clean. This has been done to ward off law suits due to the stepping in (or out) person tripping on the way in (or out) thereby causing the dirty (or now clean) person to trip and fall. If this were to happen, there would almost certainly be a lawsuit because the shower person tripped in lawsuit happy America.
• Because the slope is so gentle the water does not drain fast enough.
• What the water does do is build up and overflow out of the shower stall because there is no lip or ledge to prevent it from doing so.
• This results in water flowing out of the stall onto the tiled bathroom floor.
• The water on the tiled bathroom floor is waiting for the slippery clean foot to step onto it which will, any day now, cause a newly cleaned person to slip and fall which will almost certainly result in a lawsuit in lawsuit happy America.

At first I did not understand why that young trial lawyer was sitting outside the bathroom with his business card at the ready. Being sly, cunning and alert, it was not long before I figured it out. He is there waiting for the thud and the moan from inside the bathroom. He is there as a “public servant” to see that we get what’s coming to us (and to make payments on his Mercedes Benz) in lawsuit happy America.

Would I kid u?