Remember Plastic?

Originally Published 12/27/20 but Modified 8/21/22...

I read where Climate Change (formerly known as Global Warming) is causing a Fungus to grow on the trees that Produce Plastic. The Fungus is causing the trees to shrivel up and dies at an alarming rate. Some really smart people are warning that we have only 7 years before the Plastic Industry will be a thing of the past.

I am pecking out this Blog Posting to the Whole World (OK, a small slight sliver of the World) to do what I can to slow the certain demise of the Plastic Industry. My stopgap delaying tactic will not fix the problem but it will be significant.

It has to do with Deceptive Containers that are all over the Fruited Plain (Actually the Whole World)…

Above is one of Offending Deceptive Containers. You go into stores and see these large containers and we say to ourselves, “Now there is a large container!” You take it home and shake away and never know how deceptively you have been deceived.

There comes the day when your large container is empty and you think to yourself, “Self, I’m going to go back to my store and buy another large container of powder! You are happy. Your store is happy.

Some call this Fat, Dumb and Happy. The truth is your Wallet Is Not Fat, You Are Dumb and the Really Happy one in all of this is the Powder Manufacturer.

Do you get my drift yet? It’s the Deceptive Large Container! The container is Large but it is only about One Third Filled with Powder! You, my Dear Reader, have been had.

Have you ever thought to yourself, “That Fella is different from me”. I am different. You go home and start shaking your powder. I go home and take the very-hard-to-get-off top of the Deceptive Container and I look down and shout out, “Eureka! They are trying to deceive me!” Almost immediately an Echo Came Back…“Eureka! They are trying to deceive me!”…“Eureka! They are trying to deceive me!”…“Eureka! They are trying to deceive me!”

Yea, I go back and buy a new Deceptive Container when my old Deceptive Container runs out just like you do but I know I have the satisfaction of knowing I been screwed and you don’t.

I know I know the Powder Manufacturer is standing (he can’t sit because his wallet is too big) in his big evil office smiling at all of us not-too-smart people.

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I have a fix. I propose that our 9% Approval Rating Congress pass a Federal Law that required all manufacturers of anything to make their plastic containers a smidgen larger than the space taken up by the Contained Product they are selling.

The Worldwide Benefit to all of world would be immediate and long-lasting…

Ø Think of the Plastic Trees that will be saved!

Ø Think of the Trapped Air that would not be trapped inside of these huge Deceptive Containers and would then be available for us to breath!

Ø Big Box Stores would be able to build smaller Big Box Stores because they would no longer have need for as much display space as they once had.

Ø Big Box Stores would have available more floor space where they could put in increased numbers of Check Out Counters with signs on them that read, “This Register Is Closed”.

I’m finished kidding u.

Smartfella