A Lesson In Higher Arithmetic

For this Blog Posting you ought to put down your beer because you are going to have to be at your best to follow this Foolishness.

Higher Arithmetic by Bullet Point...

Ø Needless to say (but I’ll say it anyway) any Washington D.C. forecast of how much money will be spent on anything is always too low.

Ø Forget bullet point #1 above. For purposes of my Higher Arithmetic Lesson, I’ll accept the current forecast for the Green New Deal at $93 Trillion.

Ø However, you should not forget that $93 Trillion is 93 Thousand Billion Dollars.

Ø A Supporter of the New Green Deal Who Is Running for President was asked where the $93 Trillion is going to come from.

Ø The Supporter of the New Green Deal Who Is Running for President did not like the question and he got snippy with his answer.

Ø The Supporter of the New Green Deal Who Is Running for President pointed out that Amazon made $5 Billion in 2017 and did not pay any Income Taxes.

(It should be noted that Amazon avoided paying any Income Taxes through the legal use of existing Tax Law.)

Ø OK. I give up. This is a valid argument and I concede that the Supporter of the New Green Deal Who Is Running for President has won this argument.

My surrender above was done with my tongue firmly planted in my cheek and, therefore, it was not a legitimate surrender at all but was only an attempt for me to catch my breath. Here I come again...

Ø Would it surprise you if I said that $5 Billion (5 thousand million) is not a lot of money?

Ø Actually it is not when it is compared to $93 Trillion (93 thousand billion).

Ø For the sake of argument I will concede that the Supporter of the New Green Deal Who Is Running for President is right and Amazon must pay Income Taxes on its $5 Billion Profit.

Ø I will further concede that Amazon should accept the entire $5 Billion as its Income Tax Responsibility for 2017.

Here comes the Higher Arithmetic...

$93 Trillion minus $5 Billion leaves 92 Trillion 995 Billion More Dollars that the Supporter of the New Green Deal Who Is Running for President needs to find from somewhere else to pay for the Green New Deal’s Total Cost.

Note from Fella to the Supporter of the New Green Deal Who Is Running for President:

You may not like the question and you may want to get snippy with me with your answer but I have to ask...

Where do you plan to get the 92 Trillion 995 Billion More Dollars?

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: Oh darn! Here comes Senator Foghorn Leghorn stepping up to the podium. I know what he is going to say before he says it. He is so predictable... “Son, why son, don’t ya see it? 93 ain’t much! Why it’s only 1 more than 92. It’s not even 94. Now if you were talking about 95, you might have a valid point but, golly gee, 93 is only 93!”

Please Help Me! I’m So Busy Writing Blogs About Foolishness I Don’t Have Time To Save Our Country.

I need you to get in Contact with the 2020 Presidential Candidates and get a message to them from Alexander Tyler.

 

Before I give you the message I am pleading with you to pass along, I need to make you aware of what the 2020 Presidential Candidates have been about while they have been going about the Campaign Trail telling us what they want to do for us...

Ø One of the Candidates wants to create a system that ensures Americans have an income of at least $1,000 a month.

Ø Another one of the Candidates wants there to be a universal basic income in the Good Ole USofA regardless of whether or not the Income Receiver works for the Basic Income.

Ø There is a Candidate who is proposing a plan that he calculates will provide $46,215 to every 18-year-old in the lowest income bracket by giving them annual subsidies in a federally managed savings account.

Ø Almost all the Candidates appear to be proposing Free College Tuition.

Ø Some of the Candidates have jumped on the giving of Reparations to Present Day Living People who had ancestors who suffered Discriminations while they were Long Ago Living People.

Ø All Candidates are not bothering to propose Free Phones because Free Phone is now in a category called Established Entitlement.

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Here is the Alexander Tyler Information...

At about the time our original 13 states adopted their new constitution, in the year 1787, Alexander Tyler was a Scottish history professor at The University of Edinburgh and he had this to say about "The Fall of The Athenian Republic" some 2,000 years prior.

"A democracy is always temporary in nature; it simply cannot exist as a permanent form of government. A democracy will continue to exist up until the time that voters discover that they can vote themselves generous gifts from the public treasury. From that moment on, the majority always votes for the candidates who promise the most benefits from the public treasury, with the result that every democracy will finally collapse due to loose fiscal policy, (which is) always followed by a dictatorship." (Fella did the bolding and underlining above.)

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If Alexander was with us today, he would probably confess that he is saddened to see that he was so smart before he became an American...

“I take no joy is seeing how smart I was in 1787. My prediction is coming to pass with more vehemence than even I thought was possible. All of us in the Good Ole USofA are in a heap of trouble. I tried to warn ye but, instead of reading and heeding my plain spoken brilliance, ye chose to Tweet and Retweet Miscellaneous Trivial Foolishness”.

 

Would I kid ye?

Smartfella

First Time Ever! Our Federal Government Has Been Petitioned From Beyond The Grave...Part 2

This Blog Posting to Foolishness...Or Is It is now almost 6 years old. Because of the Zaniness that is our Congress, I have this irresistible urge to republish it...Or should I?

 

I know what I will do. I will add a Lagniappe onto it as a flimsy excuse to unleash it again. I hope you will forgive me for resorting to this trickery but the Continuing Craziness in Washington, and the fact that today is the old traditional date we celebrate Washington’s Birthday, demands I do this.

 

Smartfella

2/22/19

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General George Washington has petitioned the Congress to change the name of Washington D.C. to, "Anything else ye damn well please". 

He went on to say... 
     "I spent my life in service to this once great country and I no longer consider it an honor to have our capital named after me. 

    Besides, my cohorts up here in heaven have begun to laugh at me every time the word "Washington" is mentioned on the news shows down there. Since ye now have the 24 Hour News Cycle, the guffaws are never ending. 

    Sadly sleep is not needed up here. If we did sleep, I could get away from the ridicule for a wee bit. This being the case, the laughing and finger pointing never stops. 

    Benjamin Franklin is the worst!" 

Authorities are baffled at how Ole George went about communicating with our 2017 11% Approval Rated Congress. 

A Senate Committee will begin holding hearings next week to get to the root of this strange phenomenon. Committee Hearings are a sure way to get to the bottom of any issue of importance...Or are they? 

Would I kid u? 
Smartfella

 

Lagniappe: I have an idea! I recommend you change the name Washington D.C. to Franklin D.C.

This Blog Posting Is Not Written In Support Of Cruelty Being Perpetrated On The Livers Of Ducks And Geese

With the one exception of that Goose that bit my oldest daughter on her Stomach about 49 years ago, while she was happily feeding it, I like all other Ducks and Geese.

(Actually she was bitten on her Tummy because she was not old enough to have developed a Stomach yet.)

An excerpt from this article https://nypost.com/2019/02/03/state-bill-would-ban-foie-gras-in-new-york-for-animal-cruelty/ is below...

“New Yorkers will be saying ‘au revoir' to a popular, but controversial, French delicacy if a local legislator has her way.

A Manhattan legislator is pushing for a city ban on the sale of Foie Gras by restaurants and vendors on the basis of animal cruelty.

A New York Councilwoman told reporters that her bill proposing to make sale of the fattened-goose-liver pate criminal is ‘common sense’ because the Foie Gras production process is ‘egregious’ and has been wrongly ‘tolerated’ for ‘far too long’ in the Big Apple.

Violators would be guilty of a misdemeanor and face fines of up to $1,000 and a year in jail for each offense, if the proposal became law.”

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I am not advocating being mean to Ducks and Geese but many in the Good Ole USofA today say, I don’t use that product, so I don’t care what you do to the people that do use that product.

A good example of this way of thinking is those that say, “I don’t smoke, therefore, I am in favor of taxing the Devil out of Cigarettes because I won’t be paying the tax on those Taxed Cigarettes”.

Since most people do not eat Foie Gras, this law will probably be passed.

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Question to the Foie Gras Legislator: Does it bother you to know that in New York State a Goose or a Duck would have more protection from pain and suffering than an Unborn or a Just Born Human Baby?

Answer from the Foie Gras Legislator: What are you some kind of nitpicky person? Don’t you understand that an Unborn or a Just Born Human Baby does not have feathers?

Response from the questioner: You have a valid point there. I wonder why I never thought of that.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Some People Will Always Be Opposed To Whatever Is Proposed

When anything is proposed about anything the News Media will immediately come back with the contrary positions taken by Some People. The implication is, if Some People are not in favor of what has been proposed, we ought not to proceed with whatever has been proposed.

Of course there is opposition. There is always opposition. I’ll give you some examples from the pages of history...

Ø Normandy Invasion: General Eisenhower decided he wanted to have the Normandy Invasion at Normandy but Some People thought Eisenhower should not attack the Normandy Beachhead because it was such a pretty beach and an attack there would clutter it up.

Ø The Smartphone: Steve Jobs decided he wanted to invent the Smartphone but Some People thought Steve Jobs should not bother making the Smartphone because people were too busy playing Trivial Pursuit and they did not want to be interrupted.

Ø Hitler Killing Jews: President Roosevelt wanted to stop Hitler from killing all the Jews but Some People thought we should not try and stop Hitler from killing all the Jews because Hitler had promised that, once he had killed all the Jews, he would stop killing Jews.

I admit I made up these 3 examples and I apologize...Or did I?...Or do I?

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Return With Me To Those Thrilling Days Of Yesteryear

I made up the made up bolded centered News Release below. Why did I make it up? You will have to and read this Blog Posting to find out. Trust me, it will make perfect sense...Or will it?

 

Amalgamated Widgets, Inc. has announced that it’s near and long term profit outlooks are bright. This positive forecast is directly related to actions taken by its management that have resulted in increased sales in all areas in which the company distributes and sells its New and Improved Widgets.

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That was then and this is now. This is how we Increase Profits and Sales Momentum in the Good Ole USofA today...

 

(I just took a moment out of creating this Blog Posting to look up the word “momentum” in order to help me understand what’s going on but it did not help.)

 

General Motors management has said its earnings are picking up speed, with added momentum (there’s that word again) due to come this year from Plant Closures and Job Cuts.

 

GM said further that its largest restructuring since its 2009 bankruptcy will have a Speedy Impact on its Bottom Line. The cuts to its North American operations should Boost Operating Profit in 2019 by nearly 20%, or by over $2 billion, with More Benefit Expected in 2020.

 

GM’s shares rose 7% to $37.17 after the above announcement.

 

GM management is currently focused on Cutting Costs and Improving Cash Flow to Sustain Strong Results (I started to look up “Strong Results” but decided against it because it might confuse me even more.) in the event the U.S. auto market cools, while still funneling money toward future bets on electric and self-driving vehicles.

 

GM’s restructuring includes Idling Five Factories in the U.S. and Canada this year, part of a plan that could Cut 14,000 Employees in route to slashing $6 billion in Annual Cash Costs by 2020.

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Man, am I Silly! As I was rising to the height of my Mediocre Automotive Career I thought we were supposed Concentrate on Building Quality Vehicles, Increasing Customer Loyalty by Treating Our Customers Right Before and After the Sale and Building a Strong Dealer Body that would work hand in hand with us to Develop a Customer Base that would Return Again and Again to their Dealerships for Repeat Vehicle Sales and its Companion Service and Parts Income.   

 

Now I find I was all wrong. If we had been concentrating on Closing Plants and Cutting Workers there is no telling how much money we could have made!

 

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

At First The Smart People Thought It Was An Unusually Severe Series Of Earthquakes But That’s Not What It Was

Seismologists all across the Northeast United States have been in a tizzy for the last week. Their Earthquake Detecting Machines (EDMs) have been shaking continuously 24/7 and the Seismologists have been sending out this dire warning to the good people of the entire Northeast to get the heck out of there:

Major earthquakes have been sweeping the Northeast United States for several days. What exactly is causing them is still undetermined.

In keeping with our ongoing policy of exercising an abundance of caution abundantly when we can’t explain what is abundantly not certain, we are recommending the immediate evacuation of the entire Northeast United States.

We do not think we are over exaggerating the dangers facing this part of our country.

Yes, we are saying Get the Hell Out Of Dodge and every other city, town, village, hamlet and nook and cranny from Virginia and Pennsylvania through Maine.

We will issue another News Release when it’s safe to return, if ever that day comes.

Fella is not one to jump onto the Overreaction Bandwagon. I did my own research into these strange happenings using my own EDM in my basement and I have found the real reason why these Non-Stop Apparent Earthquakes are happening.

 

Once you see what my research has come up with, you will be saying to your collective selves, “Of course, why did I not see that! I wish I were as smart as Fella!”

 

It’s the Scandalous Political Revelations in the State of Virginia that’s causing the ground to rumble as if there were actual earthquakes going on...and on...and on.

 

What’s actually happened is the craziness surrounding the Governor, the Lt. Governor and the State’s Attorney General has caused Virginia’s Founding Fathers (James Madison, Thomas Jefferson, George Washington, George Mason, John Jay, John Blair, James McClurg, Edmund Randolph, George Wythe, Richard Henry Lee and Patrick Henry) to Roll Over in Their Graves.

 

Just stop and think about it. That’s a lot of rolling!

 

The Wall Street Journal had an interesting commentary to make on February 8, 2019, “How can we continue looking down on Arkansas and Mississippi with this sort of stuff going on?”

 

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

 

Lagniappe: To heap scandal upon scandal, I have also found out that Seismologist R Us have also been paid off by the Motel 6 Chain of Motels in the Midwest United States to issue the Evacuation Notice to the Northeast United States. This ruse has paid off handsomely for Motel 6 because every one of their Motels in the Mid-West has had to turn on their No Vacancy Sign (something not a single one of them has ever had to do before this Orchestrated Windfall).

Be Careful About Who You Hate

First I will give you a Wonderful News Update...

Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah!

It Is Being Reported That Israeli Scientists Have Found a Cure for Cancer!!!

If a new report out of Israel turns out to be true, scientists in the Jewish state of Israel have discovered a cure for Cancer. And not just a cure for certain forms of cancer, but a complete cure for the deadly disease.

 

According to Dan Aridor, chairman of the board of Accelerated Evolution Biotechnologies Ltd. (AEBi) and CEO Dr. Ilan Morad, their treatment will not need time for the body to acculturate to it before it works. Aridor stated, “We believe we will offer in a year’s time a complete cure for cancer. … Our cancer cure will be effective from day one ... and will have no or minimal side-effects at a much lower cost than most other treatments on the market. Our solution will be both generic and personal.”

 

The treatment is called MuTaTo (multi-target toxin), and works much like antibiotics do in targeting bacteria. MuTaTo is based on SoAP technology, which works by finding, binding and removing bacteria by utilizing bacteriophage-derived proteins. Bacteriophages are viruses that infect bacteria.

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It continues to amaze me how the Late Paul Harvey shows up behind me at the most opportune moments. Yes, he is right behind me at this very moment telling me to tell all of you, The Rest of the Story...

 

The Israelis, in cooperation with the Late Dr. Leonard (Bones) McCoy of Star Trek fame (died of Stomach Cancer in 1999), have perfected Dr. McCoy’s little hand-held scanning device that will be used to scan any cancer ridden patient before this Miracle Cancer Cure is administered.

 

If the McCoy Scanner reveals the cancer-ridden patient hates all Jews and wants to see the State of Israel wiped off the face of the Earth, the Miracle Cancer Cure will only be effective on that patient for curing Toenail Fungus.

 

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: Quote from Dr. McCoy...”You see, I feel sorrier for you than I do for him, because you'll never know the things that love can drive a man to... the ecstasies, the miseries, the broken rules, the desperate chances, the glorious failures, and the glorious victories. All of these things you'll never know, simply because the word "love" isn't written into your book.”

Lagniappe Another: If you want to read one of the many article on the Internet about Israel’s Cancer Cure, click below...

https://www.dailywire.com/news/42759/still-want-boycott-israel-israeli-scientists-find-hank-berrien