Sunday, January 07, 2018

I Just Heard Someone Say, “Under Ordinary Circumstances” And I Said To Myself, “Self, What’s Ordinary?”

I have a feeling that the world we live in has always been Extraordinary but, if it was not always that way, it is now.

Nothing is “Ordinary” any longer. There used to be things we could depend on because that’s just the way it was. Now we are beleaguered by the Topsy-Turvy, Upside Down, Crazy, Unbelievable, Strange, etc.

 

What am I talking about? Here are a few examples…

Ø If your parents found out that Sister Mary Mary had to discipline you by hitting you on your hand with her ruler, you got hit with another ruler at home. Now parents run screaming (closely followed by their lawyer) to the school to give Sister Mary Mary a piece of their mind.

Ø In San Francisco people used to jump off the Golden Gate Bridge and die. Now Bridge Officials are installing a System of Nets that will cost over $200 Million Dollars to discourage jumpers.
>Did you notice the word “over” in the above bullet, as in “over $200 Million Dollars”. Do you know how high over $200 Million Dollars “over $200 Million Dollars” can go? I don’t and they don’t either.

>Current news reports say initially the cost was to be $76 Million Dollars. I wrote about this craziness in 2008 and I know that at that time Bridge Officials were saying it would cost between $40 and $50 Million Dollars. This can only mean that they are lying about their past lies.
>In my 2008 Blog Posting I pointed out that people who want to commit suicide want to commit suicide. This means that they are going to scramble across the net and fall over the edge of the net so they can continue to commit suicide.
>Bridge Officials will find that, in order to prevent the suicide determined jumpers from continuing to commit suicide, guards with rifles will have to be employed to shoot them before they get to the edge of the net.

Ø Phone Booths were everywhere but none were called Cars.

Ø Boys were boys and girls were girls.

Ø We used to work and study hard so we could get to the point where we deserved the things we acquired. Now we see and hear commercials every day that tell us we deserve lots of things (start paying attention to commercials and you will be amazed at all the things the announcer says you deserve)…A trip to Hawaii, A big screen TV, Not to have to pay your credit card balance in full, A dental implant, An Apple Watch (And every other Electronic Device there is out there), etc.

Ø Only men and women married each other.

Ø We used to address people older than us as “Sir” and “Ma’am”. I still do that but I don’t limit it to the few people that are older than I am. The look of confusion on the faces of those around me when I do this is beautiful to behold. Occasionally someone will say. “You must be from down south”. To which I happily reply, “Yes, sir/ma’am, I am”.

Ø We used to say, “Hello or Good Morning”. From that we progressed to, “Where ya at, man”. Then we progressed further on to, “Hey, dude”. I don’t consider this “Progress” Progress.

Ø The Cubs could not win the World Series.

Ø We used to put on a Coat and Tie to go pick people up at the Airport. Now we go to Sunday Morning Church dressed as if we just got back from the Beach or out of the Garden.

Ø Dogs and Trees were not People Too.

Ø We all only had 7 TV Channels. We watched 3 to 4 of our 7 TV Channels. Now we pay through the nose so we can brag that we have 552 TV Channels but we watch 3 to 4 of our 552 TV Channels.

Ø The MailMan was called the MailMan and not the PersonPerson.

Ø Politicians did not lie every time they opened their mouths…Or did they not?

Ø We used to be required to be home in time to sit at the Dinner Table for Family Dinner and we did not consider it a Requirement. We sat up straight and said “please” a lot. Now Family Dinners are only seen on Ozzie and Harriet and Ozzie and Harriet is not seen and I am considered Out of Step because I just changed my Email Lagniappe Signature to… "No text message is ever worth interrupting a meal with people you love."

 

Maybe the Good Ole Days were really not as Good as we make them out to be but I do think they were less confusing.

 

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

 

Lagniappe: In 1970 I ate at a well-known restaurant in Shreveport, LA that had been there for many years and it had a sign in its foyer from its early days of operation that read, “It’s tough to spend 75 Cents for a steak, but if you spend 50 Cents, it’s tougher”.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Today on Sunday morning was a segment on suicide at the Golden Gate Bridge. I thought it interesting that so much was dedicated to the prevention of suicide. But what if those who contributed to the net decided to try suicide elsewhere. Would they apply for and receive a voucher for another venue, Say for example the Golden Gate was not an option any longer, could they get a voucher for lodging, meals, and access to El Capitan in Yosemite?

SmartFella? said...

I talked about other suicide opportunities in my earlier blogs on this subject.
Enjoy!...Or will u?
http://forii.blogspot.com/search?q=Golden+Gate
FellaO

Anonymous said...

I was just wondering the other day....when did dogs become people. It is CRAZY!!!!