Wednesday, October 02, 2013

I Am Now Financially Set For Life

Opportunity knocks at the most unexpected times. Thankfully I was ready for it and I have taken action to set myself up financially for life.

This stroke of genius has taken a huge worry from my mind. I had been counting on the proceeds from the sale of my book to take care of me in my fast approaching golden years but my mind is not yet so golden that I could not see that that plan was in jeopardy.

I have set up a company called, Monuments Up Close. Out of my garage at this moment are flowing a line of products that will revolutionize Washington D.C. national monument viewing in Shut Down America.

Since our Federal Government has determined that during the Shut Down we are not allowed to get close to the Washington D.C. Monuments, I am making it possible to get close without getting close. (All of the parts of all of the packages below will be painted Red White & Blue, of course)...

  • Bronze Package...A set of Binoculars or one of those Zoomies Binocular Eyeglasses advertised on TV for seeing our beloved monuments over the top of the barricades.
  • Silver Package...Includes the Bronze Package but adds one of those 3 Step Folding Ladders from Home Depot to allow the Silver Package owner to see over those cheap people who only bought Bronze Packages.
  • Gold Package...Includes the Bronze and Silver package but adds a Turntable that revolves 360 degrees so the Gold Package Owner can see the full panorama of our nation’s capital. The turntable will make a complete revolution in exactly 13 minutes in honor of the 13 original colonies.
  • Platinum Package... Includes the Bronze, Silver and Gold Package but adds a Sound System that will play a continuous loop of John Philip Sousa Music.

The only thing that could put a damper on my plan for a comfortable retirement is if the Federal Government Shutdown came to a quick end.

When I look at the makeup of the Rulers who are presently ruling us I am confident that the end will not be quickly forthcoming and my retirement financial security is assured.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

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