Sunday, September 29, 2013

I Not About To Get In The Middle Of The Raising The Debt Ceiling Controversy... Or am I?

Back when we had Freedom of Speech in this country, I would not have been so hesitant to peck out this Blog Posting. I’m gonna peck on anyway...

Our 10% approval rated congress is again talking about whether we ought to raise the Debt Ceiling.

Should our rulers not be talking about what we are doing wrong that “necessitates” us having to raise our Debt Ceiling?

If you think the Good Ole USofA can keep doing this every few months and survive, you ought to be writing a Blog called Foolishness...You Bet Ya!

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

(117)

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Saturday, September 28, 2013

Originality Is One Of My Strongest Attributes…Or is it?

I have every confidence that I can be Original, Clever and/or Smart. I especially like to be Original.

In a burst of Original Thinking I came up with the following thought...

Lying to Congress is a Crime (a felony)

But

Lying by Congress is not a crime

I recently heard an Important and Powerful Member of Congress say, “Politicians running for office say a lot of things they do not mean”.

This was the response to a question about a particular politician doing the complete opposite after being elected from what he said he would do while he was campaigning.

To make it even worst this response was accompanied by a lot of smiling and laughing by the Important and Powerful Member of Congress.

clip_image002

Back to my Original Boast about My Being Original...

I decided to look up, “Lying by Congress” in Google. Google quickly came back at me and (as it usually does) gave me the total hits on “Lying by Congress”...

“About 35,600,000 Results”

It sure looks like a lot of other Original Thinkers beat me to it.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

(193)

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

I Do Not Understand You!

This is not a politically inspired blog posting. Some of you will understandably be sensitive about some of these terminology changes. Don’t be.
This is only an exercise in the observation of the Proliferation of Intended Confusion. If we had just stayed with the original word/phrase usage, we would not be constantly saying, “What does that mean?”
Today we are is a constant state of unease because our society is obsessed with changing Words and Phrases that we understand to something we don’t understand in order to make us feel better and/or trick us into thinking we feel better...
All examples below came from some legitimate news outlet. I did not make any of these up…
    • Tax Increase...
o Revenue Enhancement
  • Put the company up For Sale...
o Explore Strategic Alternatives
  • Suspect...
o Person of Interest
  • Secretary of War...
o Secretary of Defense
  • Spending of Federal Funds...
o Investment of Federal Funds
  • Tax Cut...
o Eliminate a Revenue Stream
  • Commit Crime...
o Exhibit Misbehavior
  • Vandalism...
o Interference with Government or Private Property
  • Evacuation...
o Order of Departure
  • Terror Attack...
o Man Caused Disaster
  • A Big Missile that could carry 10-12 Re-Entry Vehicles each Armed with a 300-Kiloton W87 Warhead...
o The Peacekeeper Missile
  • Global War on Terror...
o Overseas Contingency Operation
  • Lost Job...
o Laid Off
  • Fired...
o Laid Off
  • Fired...
o Downsized
  • Abortion...
o Choice
  • Terror Attack at Ft. Hood...
o Workplace Violence
  • Quotas…
o Diversity Metrics
  • Congressional Vacation...
o Recess
  • Congressional Vacation...
o Home District Work Period
  • Coup d'état...
o Change of Government
  • Coup d'état...
o Intervention
  • Illegal Alien...
o Undocumented Alien
  • Illegal Alien...
o Undocumented Worker
  • Illegal Alien...
o Undocumented American
  • Illegal Alien...
o Undocumented Citizen
  • Employee...
o Associate
  • Retreat...
o Retrograde Movement
  • Lying...
o Giving False Information
  • Secretary...
o Administrative Assistant
  • Armed Policeman in Our Schools...
o School Resource Officer
  • Gun Control...
o Gun Reform
  • Global Warming...
o Climate Changes
  • Obamacare Penalties...
o Affordable Care Act Shared Responsibility Payments
  • Burns...
    • Thermal Injuries
  • A Sexual Affair...
o An Encounter
      • Government Printing Money...
      o Quantitative Easing
Just how much confusion can this create? I’ll give you a demonstration by pecking out an Intentional Confusion Statement issued by a CEO to his minions...

>As the person responsible for the well being of this corporation, I had made a decision to explore a strategic alternative. Our survival has been put into question by the government’s latest revenue enhancement which was forced upon all of us by our government’s continued investment of our tax revenue in questionable ventures.

>I have also had a hard time concentrating on business because of my encounter with my administrative assistant and the choice she made.

>I can’t help but feel if I had set higher diversity metrics we would not be in the situation we find ourselves in at this time but our shared responsibility payment is too much to overcome.

>I have ordered in a peacekeeper for 2pm today, and since I have canceled my previously issued order of departure, please remain at your desks while the peacekeeper makes all our troubles go away.


I have held off publishing this Foolishness for quite some time and the List has continued to grow. I began to think, if I kept waiting, I might never get this one posted. That’s because this kind of obfuscation is a modern mushrooming phenomena and it will never stop.


If you come across items that could be added to the list above, send me an email or put a comment to this posting (Anonymous is OK & Easy). I have the ability to go back into any published blog and revise it. (Just like Congress I have the power to Revise & Extend my Foolishness.)
If y’all keep adding to the list, this may become known in literary circles as the Foolishness...Or Is It Without End... Amen.
Would I kid u?
Smartfella
(681)
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Monday, September 23, 2013

This Blog Posting Could Save Us A Whole Bunch Of Money

The Internet is wonderful! Here is what I learned from the Net recently...

Two thirds of deaths worldwide go completely unrecorded.

For Example: In Malawi, any death that occurs outside a medical facility is not recorded.

Do you see it? Do you see how our rulers could save us a ton or two of money?

What? You don’t see it? Sometimes the Smartfella gets discouraged. After all the effort I have expended over the years to improve your Powers of Observation, I sometimes feel I have completely failed.

OK, one more time, I will explain the obvious...

  • Every year the Good Ole USofA borrows a humongous amount of money to give to countries all over the world in the form of Foreign Aid.
  • We give our borrowed money to countries based on the number of people each country has within its borders.
  • Let’s say we believe that there are 7,000,000 people in Grand Fenwick.
  • Our rulers decide that we are going to borrow $5 for every citizen in Grand Fenwick to help Grand Fenwickians in their national effort to eradicate extinct animal species
  • That means we will borrow and give to Grand Fenwick $35,000,000.
  • Grand Fenwick is a country that does not record deaths when their citizens become dead.
  • The truth is Grand Fenwick only has 1,000,000 people.
  • If we knew the true population of Grand Fenwick, we would not have had to borrow $34,000,000 of our actually borrowed $35,000,000.

If we had no Grand Fenwickian use for this $34,000,000, Congress could have made better use of their unlimited power to borrow money. They could have gone ahead with the borrowing of the unneeded $34,000,000 and done lots of other wonderful things...

  • They could have given themselves a raise.
  • They could have given this $34,000,000 to another country that has severely overstated its population.
  • They could have purchased 3,400,000 copies of my book Foolishness...Or Is It? (Also available on Kindle) and placed them in public restrooms all over the Fruited Plain. They could have chained them in place with all those chains the Post Office has in storage in Albuquerque that it bought to use on Chained Desk Pens before they went on an austerity kick and discontinued providing Chained Desk Pens.

This last bullet above would mean a windfall of income to me because it would increase my sales by 3,399,907. With all that loot, I could hire someone to write Foolishness...Or Is It? for me.

My first choice would have been Ernest Hemingway but he is dead. I know he is dead because his death was recorded. If he had died in Malawi on his front porch, he would still be alive.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: Do you know where I came up with the name of “Grand Fenwick”? If you do, you are either very old or you just Googled it.

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Sunday, September 22, 2013

If You Want To Get Depressed ... Read This Blog Posting

This from the Internet:

A 35-year-old British man was sentenced to 14 years in jail after he pleaded guilty to convincing minor girls to send him sexual videos of themselves online, according to BBC News.

He reportedly told the young girls, posing as Bieber, that he would be their boyfriend if they stripped for him.

I would be depressed about the future if I read that 5 minor girls sent him sexually explicit videos of themselves...

The true number of videos he received was 800.

Does this information give you hope for the future?

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: He got 4 years in jail for the sexual stuff with minors because the learned judge considered that a Minor Offense and 10 years for representing himself as Justin Bieber.

(142)

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Friday, September 20, 2013

Everything We Read In The News Has Been Checked For Accuracy And We Can Be Sure It Is The Absolute Truth

Here are some of the things I read in the news about the July crash of that Asiana Airlines Flight in San Francisco...

  • Reported on the News: According to an eye witness the plane was just about to land when the tail of the plane came off.

o Truth: Its tail came off because of the crash.

  • Reported on the News: After wobbling for a minute, the aircraft flipped upside down, coming to a stop on the runway on its back.

o Truth: It never flipped upside down and did not end up on its back.

  • Reported on the News: Crashed because it was headed into the wind.

o Truth: Planes always try and land into the wind. They land better flying into the wind.

  • Reported on the News: Plane may have had only 1 pilot on board.

o Truth: It had two pilots in the cockpit at the time of the crash.

  • Reported on the News: Plane overshot the runway.

o Truth: Plane landed short of the runway.

    • Reported on the News: It cart wheeled end over end.

o Truth: It never cart wheeled end over end but it spun around.

  • Reported on the News: Smoke coming from bottom before it landed.

o Truth: It did not have smoke coming from anywhere before it crashed.

  • Reported on the News: Flight was coming in from Taipei, Taiwan.

o Truth: Flight was coming in from Seoul, South Korea.

  • Reported on the News: Questions have been raised about whether the pilots recognized that something was wrong quickly enough and did the right thing to fix it.

o The Truth: I would say the answer is “no”.

  • Reported in the News: It appears the pilots' efforts in those last few minutes were too little and too late to avert a crash.

o Truth: In St. Anthony of Padua Grammar School we were known to say, “No S**t Sherlock”.

All of the above is due to incompetence and frantic attempts to get the news to us fast. It sort of like the News Mistake Maker getting all indignant and saying, “Well, what do you want Speed or Accuracy? You can always correct inaccuracies, if you get caught, but if you don’t get caught being inaccurate, you have been accurate”.

There was a time when we could believe pictures because... “A picture is proof positive!”

Then Photoshop was invented. If you ever see my head on Arnold Schwarzenegger’s body from 30 years ago, you should not believe that is me underneath my head.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

(455)

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Confused Creatures From Outer Space

Imagine along with me for a moment...

  • A space ship from where no man has gone before outer space is hovering above the earth.
  • He studies a Human Being and a Dog out for a walk.
  • The Dog periodically poops and proudly prances to the end of his leach.
  • The Human Being gets down on his hands and knees and picks up the pooped poop and puts it in a poop bag and puts the poop containing bag in his pocket.

The question for you, my dear reader, is...

Which Being Would the Observing Space Creature Think is the Superior Being?

----------------------

I know you are dying for more silliness on this subject, so I will continue on this subject.

My newspaper has informed me that the town in which I reside is having an election to determine which of four candidates will be chosen as Top Dog. Residents in good standing can vote at any one of Five Polling Locations through September 30. The news article tells me and my fellow Duluthians...

“Four Four-Legged Candidates are Vying for the Title of Mayor of Chattapoochee Dog Park”

The Silliness never ends around here. For those of you in Australia who are reading this Blog Posting I should explain that we have a river in these parts named Chattahoochee. The Dog Park is named Chattapoochee! Get it? Are you sorry you got it?

We don’t go throwing around our awards and honors lightly in Georgia. My newspaper explains what qualifies Honey, Marley, Moon Pie and Penny to become eligible for this ballot...

“The candidates were selected based on their Community Involvement, Application Presentation and their Campaign Statements describing their recommendations for Chattapoochee Dog Park”

This is the next sentence after the prior centered bolded sentence. You may think I immediately pecked out this next sentence after pecking out the prior centered bolded sentence. Actually it has been about five minutes between the two sentences. After I pecked out the silliness about Involvement, Presentation and Statements I ran out into the street and shouted as loud as I could, “What the heck is wrong with us?!” (Yes, you are right, I did not say “heck”.)

The Dogs are winning! I think Congress ought to pass a law that would say that any About To Be Dog Buyer has to watch a Computerized Presentation that would inform him of such things as...

  • A picture of how much poop will have to be picked up in the years to come.
  • The amount of money that will be spent on Dog Accessories of All Kinds, Vets Bills, Rug Cleaning, Food, Replacement of Furniture and Over Night Stays in the Pouchie Palace. (I am sure there are a myriad of expenses I missed but you get my drift.)
  • The numbers of hours that will be spent having the Dog lead the buyer around the neighborhood.
  • A footnote ought to be included to show the tabulation of the number of hours in the above bullet that were spent in the rain or snow or middle of the night.
  • The number of times formerly friendly neighbors will knock on your door accusing your Dog of pooping on their lawns.
  • The number of arguments in his household that will occur about whose turn it is to walk the Dog.
  • The numbers of times you will shout at your Dog to stop barking at everything from Falling Leaves to Joggers to your 96 Year Old Neighbor pushing her Walker Down the Sidewalk.

It’s those ears! They hear everything! If we used to be able to put a man on the moon, why have we not invented Ear Plugs for Dogs?

Have you wondered why Dogs have such complete control over their “Masters”? I know why and you are about to know why, after you read the sentence below...

Dog Spelled Backwards Is God

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

(664)

Saturday, September 14, 2013

My Requests To Our News Media

Now that Major Nidal Hasan has been convicted of every charge brought against him except throwing out the baby with the bath water, I would like to ask our Crack News Media to stop referring to him as the “Alleged Perpetrator”.

If the above request is granted, I would like to follow up that request with one that asks the News Media to stop referring to the 13 Dead and 31 Wounded as “Alleged Victims”.

The above 2 paragraphs are a complete blog posting (without the “Would I kid u?”) but the late Paul Harvey just paid me another visit and asked me to tell you The Rest of the Story...

Just when I thought that Hasan was about to get what’s coming to him in an expeditious manner, I read that we are now into the Automatic Appeal Phase of his saga. Then just when I thought to myself that ought to take a couple of days, I read that the Automatic Appeal Phase could take decades.

There you go again thinking I am not very good at pecking at a computer. You think this because you are thinking I must have inadvertently pecked out “decades” instead of “weeks”. You are wrong about me being wrong. No, I am not confused. I got “decades” right. It is our Military Justice System that is making the mistakes.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

Lagniappe: It could be worse. He could have been tried in our Civilian Judicial System where his trial would not be complete for another 14 years and, after being convicted and incarcerated for life, he would be released in 7 years with a written apology for making him stay in prison so long.

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Friday, September 13, 2013

Wanna Meet A Fool? ... Meet Me

I keep saying I am Smart. Now I say I am dumb. Why the change? Allow me to demonstrate how smart I am by proving how dumb I am.

Our radio waves are full of advertisements from companies claiming to be capable of standing between you and the Internal Revenue Service and deflecting its attacks on you and beating it into submission.

These services never mention a fee but there must be a fee but I am sure it is not much ... Or am I? ... because they sound so sincerely concerned about the beleaguered Tax Payer’s well being and happiness.

Here are a few of the claims made by these wonderful organizations...

  • Client's Total Liability to IRS: $6,878,404
    Settlement: $0
    Savings: $6,878,404 (100%)
  • Client's Total Liability to IRS: $27,900
    Settlement: $1,200
    Savings: $26,700 (96%)
  • Clients Total Liability to IRS: $212,555
    Settlement: $2,400
    Savings: $210,155 (99%)
  • Clients Total Liability to IRS: $94,000
    Settlement: $2,046
    Savings: $91,954 (98%)
  • Clients Total Liability to IRS: $304,231
    Settlement: $73.00
    Savings: $304,158 (99%)
  • Client's Total Liability to IRS: $87,000
    Settlement: $1,500
    Savings: $85,500 (98%)
  • Client's Total Liability to IRS: $500,000
    Settlement: $10,000
    Savings: $490,000 (98%)

Do you get my drift in my Subject Line Question above? I am obviously dumb because I have always paid my taxes. The question for you, my dear reader, is... Are you as dumb as the Smartfella?

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

(248)

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Thursday, September 12, 2013

The Most Beautiful Woman In The World

I read on the Internet that Gwyneth Paltrow has been declared the Most Beautiful Woman in the World by the people who go around declaring such things.

The Smartfella has nothing against Gwyneth but that could be because I hardly know who she is, other than she is a Movie Star Celebrity. That may be a fair trade off because Gwyneth does not know who I am either.

Why did the Most Beautiful Woman in the World Selection Committee decide that they would only look at Hollywood Celebrities to find someone to put on their Silly Pedestal?

What about?...

  • Sally Watkins in Peoria, IL? ... Everyone who she rings up at her Wal-Mart checkout counter thinks she is a knockout.
  • Lilly Mae Gillcot in St. Louis, MO? ... Every patron at the zoo is amazed at how dazzling she is as she tends to the African Lions she takes care of. If the Lions could, they would give their vote to Lilly Mae every time and not even give Gwyneth a second glance.
  • The Girl from Ipanema? ... She may be a little past her prime but she was Tall and Tan and Young and Lovely and besides...

Gwyneth never had a Song of the Year named after her.

The Girl has had the Second Most Recorded Song in the history of songs sung about her. Gwyneth can’t say the same.

No song written about Gwyneth was ever chosen to be in Library of Congress.

Rather than come up with one of his Smart Alec closings to this Foolishness Posting the Smartfella has decided to just let you listen and enjoy a couple of Boys singing about The Girl...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=NldPFVKYmiw

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

(299)

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

If You Want To Have Your Beliefs Reinforced, Make Sure You Read News Articles From Sources That Reinforce Your Beliefs

Contrary to what your first impression might be, this is not a Blog Posting that is For or Against our President’s Syrian Chemical Weapons Position.

It is simply my valiant attempt to advise you to read from sources that believe as you believe, so that you will know that you are right.

First Major News Publication Outlet...

ST. PETERSBURG, Russia - U.S. President Barack Obama resisted pressure on Friday to abandon plans for air strikes against Syria and enlisted the support of 10 fellow leaders for a "strong" response to a chemical weapons attack.

Obama refused to blink after Russian President Vladimir Putin led a campaign to talk him out of military intervention at a two-day summit of the Group of Twenty developed and developing economies in St. Petersburg.

He persuaded nine other G20 nations plus Spain to join the United States in signing a statement calling for a strong international response, although it fell short of supporting military strikes, underscoring the deep disagreements that dominated the summit.

What this article teaches you...

  • Our President is a man of conviction... “resisted pressure”.
  • Our President is able to get others to follow his lead... “enlisted the support of 10 fellow leaders for a "strong" response”.
  • Our President holds firm to his convictions... “refused to blink”.
  • Our President is able to get others to follow his lead... “persuaded nine other G20 nations plus Spain to join the United States in signing a statement”.
  • Our President is tough... “calling for a strong international response”.

Second Major News Publication Outlet...

ST. PETERSBURG, Russia—President Barack Obama fell short in his bid to rally international support for a U.S. military strike on Syria, failing to overcome divisions at a summit of world leaders before flying home to face skeptics in Congress and the American public.

The lobbying blitz calling for a "strong international response" to Syria's alleged use of chemical weapons against rebels showed little sign of changing the minds of world leaders—some of whom took that phrase to mean "military action."

Mr. Obama's push also gained little ground in building a coalition to politically isolate Russian President Vladimir Putin, the summit host and one of the Syrian regime's chief allies and protectors.

What this article teaches you...

  • Our President is not able to get others to follow his lead... “fell short in his bid to rally international support.”
  • Our President is in trouble in his own country... “before flying home to face skeptics in Congress.”
  • Our President is not able to get others to follow his lead... “lobbying blitz calling for a "strong international response" to Syria's alleged use of chemical weapons against rebels showed little sign of changing the minds of world leaders.”
  • Our President can’t stand up successfully to the Russian President... “also gained little ground in building a coalition to politically isolate Russian President.”

These news articles were published the same day about the same prior day’s meeting in Russia.

As I stated above, you must choose your sources. The best way to reinforce your own beliefs is to read the source that supports your beliefs last. If you get confused and read the one that does not support your own beliefs last then simply go back and read the first one again. This will then become the last one you read and you will know that you are right in holding on to your Deep-Seated and Long-Held Beliefs.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

(603)

Sunday, September 08, 2013

Bunch Of Pleasant Fellows With Bombs

If we dropped flowers on the bad guys, they would certainly like us better … Or would they?

Have you noticed the current series of ads by the U.S. Navy running on TV? If you have not noticed, this Blog Posting is about to inform you about what has been happening on your TV while you were out getting a beer.

The U.S. Navy has a whole lot of ships, planes and bombs that can wreak havoc if called upon to float around the world to do some havoc wreaking. That appears to be their mission of the past. Now their mission is ... Ah ... Uh ... I’m not sure what their mission is.

The words used at the end of two U.S. Navy commercials are what have caught my attention...

America’s Navy ... A Force For Good

While I agree that blowing up things and people that are trying to kill us all is a pretty good good, I am not sure this is what the commercial wordsmiths were intending to convey with the use of the word “good” in the above example.

&

Committed To Excellence and the Fair Treatment of All

I started to write something glib about “Fair Treatment” but I found I was glibless. I know “glibless” is not a word but that is what I am feeling about all of this, so I’ll leave it in.

I will know my concerns are valid if I start seeing these kinds of tag lines for other branches of our Fighting Forces...

  • Army ... Army Strong But Compassionate
  • Air Force ... Understanding From Above
  • Marines ... A Few Nice Men

I’ve decided I am right to fret over all of this Goodness, Fairness, Compassion, Understanding and Niceness because I read a news article the other day which told me that Admiral Bull Halsey has been turning over in his grave.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

(326)

Monday, September 02, 2013

Allow Me To Make It Up To You

That last Foolishness...Or Is It? was very long. Allow me to make it up to you with a short one...

My newspaper tells me that 2 very famous Hollywood Celebrities are separating from each other and living apart in order to “work on their marriage”.

That’s the way celebrities “work” on their marriages. Out here in the real world we go out for a pizza and a couple of beers to work on our marriages.

Since Hollywood Celebrities are known to be smarter than we are, that means they know how to fix marriages and we don’t… Or do we don’t?

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

(115)

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Sunday, September 01, 2013

I Agree That Your Position Is The Correct One And, Since My Position Is Opposite To Your Position, That Proves That My Position Is Right

This bullet points listed below in this Blog Posting were gleaned from an article about the NSA Spying Scandal published on 8/21/13. If you want to read all of it, click here: http://www.reuters.com/article/2013/08/22/us-usa-security-nsa-idUSBRE97K14Y20130822

If you do take the time to read the article, you will no doubt (see how smart I know my dear readers to be?) notice the following key excerpts...

  • “unintentionally collected as many as 56,000 emails of Americans per year between 2008 and 2011 in a program that a secret U.S. court (Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act of 1978 ... Note the word “foreign”.) subsequently said may have violated U.S. law and the Constitution
  • “the third instance in less than three years in which the government has disclosed a substantial misrepresentation regarding the scope of a major collection program”
  • “October 2011 ruling that the court (FISA) had concluded that the process that resulted in improper collections of the tens of thousands of emails was in some respects, deficient on statutory and constitutional grounds

It appears that the NSA is not denying the allegations underlined above but then the article had this to say: “Intelligence officials, speaking on condition of anonymity, defended their practices”.

The article clarified this matter further...

The emails in question represent only a small slice of the electronic communications scooped up around the world by the NSA. It targets about 250 million email communications for collection each year and, under a separate program, has captured and kept records of millions of phone calls by Americans.

The 250 million emails (plus millions of phone calls) admitted to in the above paragraph is described as follows... “Not An Egregious Overreaching”.

The reason our Federal Government can say this is Not An Egregious Overreaching is because of the Congressional Bunch of Things Grading System...

  • Anything less than 250 million of anything is a Drop in the Bucket.
  • Exactly 250 million is Not Egregious.
  • Anything over 250 million is Egregious.

Are you confused? I’m confused because they apparently don’t deny the bad things they did and they agree the bad things are bad things but they defend the bad things as good things.

Washington D.C. jargon what they are saying is...

Yes we did it. Yes it was wrong to do it.

but

That which we did, which was wrong, was right.

Need more examples of Washington D.C. Jargon?...

  • I got my gun, took careful aim at him and shot him in the chest but I did not mean to hurt him.
  • Yes I agree fully that what I testified to was a ball faced lie but, if it were true, it would be true.
  • I understand that as a Member of Congress I keep voting myself raises far in access of what is available to the minions outside of Congress but you must understand that I have a very wasteful lifestyle and I keep running out of money.

Did I clarify this issue for you? If so, I’m glad I could help.

Would I kid u?

Smartfella

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