Thursday, October 20, 2011

This May Be Our Most Entertaining TV Show … Provided You Are Resigned To The Sad Belief That Americans Are Not Too Smart

Please note the Gadget on the left called “Share it”. If you are entertained by this Foolishness (or one in the future), use “Share it” to tell your friends or enemies about it on FaceBook or Twitter.

PLEASE don’t think I watch Are You Smarter than a 5th Grader on a regular basis. It’s just that sometimes I am in the gym (trying to keep my heart from attacking me) and I am faced with several unpalatable choices like…

  • The View
  • The Talk
  • The Chew
  • Those Wonder Bra Infomercials that go on forever 

Some of these Average Americans on Are You Smarter than a 5th Grader (who I fear are really Average Americans) are really stupid.

Here is the first example…

  1. Question: “In what state was the Transcontinental Railroad completed in 1869?”
  2. The contestant (who we had already been told had a 3.87 Grade Point Average in college) answered, “New York State”!
  3. If you think this is the right answer, please do not add a comment to this blog posting and tell me you think it is the right answer.
  4. It would burst my bubble to know that my Foolishness…Or Is It? readers are that ignorant.
  5. The answer is Utah.
  6. Utah is nowhere close to New York.
  7. Please do not question my geographical association of New York and Utah because it would burst my bubble to know that my Foolishness…Or Is It? readers are that ignorant.

Here is another example…

  1. True or False: “Europe shares a land border with Asia”.
  2. The contestant said, “Wait a minute! What did you say was the grade level of this question?”
  3. The host reminded him it was, Second Grade Geography.
  4. After thinking about the question, the contestant then became more confident of his answer and locked in … False.
  5. The host informed the contestant that his answer was wrong and the unbelieving contestant asked to see a map on the show’s big screen to prove that the answer was True.
  6. When he was shown the map he looked like he still did not believe he was wrong.

Are You Smarter than a Fifth Grader is not the only show that make me feel embarrassed for my fellow Americans. Allow me to wrap up this Foolishness with a Jeopardy episode…
  1. There was a contestant on who we were told was a former successful Attorney and she was now a successful Talk Show Host (which proved she was smart because all Talk Show Hosts are smart … Or are they?).
  2. The question was, “Who betrayed Jesus for thirty pieces of silver?”
  3. She immediately hit the button and confidently answered, “Saint Peter!”

There you go again. You are thinking I made up all of the above. These three episodes are the absolute truth and to prove it this time I will not add an “Or is it?”.

Would I kid u?