Sunday, September 27, 2009

Looking Good Ain’t Good!

Have you looked at the Obituary Page lately? If you have, you most certainly have noticed that the pictures of the dearly departed all look like they are in great shape. There is reason to be concerned about this situation and the Smartfella? is here to advise you accordingly.
If any of the following has happen to you recently, you need to take action…
· Someone told you, “You sure are looking good!”
· A friend says, “My my! Aren’t you looking chipper today!”
· You go through the guard shack of a fancy gated community to play tennis where you have to show your driver’s license and when the guard returns your license he says, “You have lost weight since your driver’s license picture was taken. Good job!”
If any of the above is happening to you, you are in eminent danger of finding your good looking self on the Obituary Page. I urge you to do something before it is too late…
· Get a friend who really cares for you to punch you in an eye or your nose hard enough to make things swell, turn black and blue and/or bleed.
· Start wearing a patch over one eye.
· Start frowning a lot.
· Spring for some plastic surgery and get several really ugly scars installed on your good looking face.
· Get a tattoo or two.
The third bullet above (about the drivers license) has me completely unnerved because it actually happened to me last Wednesday. I have been having trouble sleeping ever since.
Would I kid u?